Financial Protection in Early Dementia?

Errata

This is controversial, but successfully "handling" someone with dementia means accommodating your behaviour to their demented damaged brain's perception of reality; then keeping them happy in their own world.

There's no controversy, it's been identified as good practice for a number of years, and many Care Homes practice it. People don't need to be "handled" - they're not wild animals.

John_Pierpoint

Have you ever been on the receiving end of a demented person?

My experience is that some carers could "handle" the situation some could not.

Like the police "handling" a drunk on Saturday night, there are some approaches that "handle" the situation better than others. Similarly some parents can "handle" a toddlers tantrum in the supermarket better than others - especially if they are not under immediate time pressure (eg. The warden is standing next to the meter waiting for it to tick over.)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elder_abuse

The other thing I have learned is that any carer, faced with an apparently never ending deteriorating 24/7 commitment to being unappreciated and abused, will eventually develop "cabin fever" and crack. Well organised social services organisations realise this and provide time off and regular respite care, to prevent the carer(s) "cracking up".

Errata

John_Pierpoint wrote: »

Have you ever been on the receiving end of a demented person?

QUOTE]
I'm sorry, I have no idea what you mean.

John_Pierpoint

Let us define terms:

Dementia is a progressive illness that involves the loss of the ability to:
Reason.
Recall.
Think.
Communicate.
Move about
and then recognise relatives and control bodily functions.
.

The effect of dementia can be likened to taking the family photo album and then working backwards tearing out the abilities and memories at random.

My personal experience is of having responsibilities for:
An Alzheimer's great aunt.
A mother in law with vascular dementia.
A mother reduced to the status of a 15 stone 3 year old by a stroke.
An uncle dying of a mis-diagnosed brain tumour.

As part of this experience spread over about 12 years, I found myself acting as driver for patients and their carers on journeys to and from respite care and special hospital appointments..Having a patient try to kick the hell out of the plastic trim, because they decided they did not want to get out of the car, is an example of being on the receiving end.

Though the really wearing effect is one of dealing with irrationality and the possible frustrated rage that may follow it. For example "You cannot go outside to meet your husband, who died 5 years ago, because I have locked the front door as it is 23:30 hours on a Sunday and it is snowing." So do you say that knowing that if you can distract the dementia suffer for five minutes the strange thought about 20 + 5 years retired husband needing to be collected from the station, will have flitted away to be replace by another possibly rational thought?

What is your practical experience of mental care in the community?

teajug

John_Pierpoint wrote: »

Let us define terms:

Dementia is a progressive illness that involves the loss of the ability to:
Reason.
Recall.
Think.
Communicate.
Move about
and then recognise relatives and control bodily functions.
.

The effect of dementia can be likened to taking the family photo album and then working backwards tearing out the abilities and memories at random.

My personal experience is of having responsibilities for:
An Alzheimer's great aunt.
A mother in law with vascular dementia.
A mother reduced to the status of a 15 stone 3 year old by a stroke.
An uncle dying of a mis-diagnosed brain tumour.

As part of this experience spread over about 12 years, I found myself acting as driver for patients and their carers on journeys to and from respite care and special hospital appointments. Having a patient try to kick the hell out of the plastic trim, because they decided they did not want to get out of the car, is an example of being on the receiving end.

Though the really wearing effect is one of dealing with irrationality and the possible frustrated rage that may follow it. For example "You cannot go outside to meet your husband, who died 5 years ago, because I have locked the front door as it is 23:30 hours on a Sunday and it is snowing." So do you say that knowing that if you can distract the dementia suffer for five minutes the strange thought about 20 + 5 years retired husband needing to be collected from the station, will have flitted away to be replace by another possibly rational thought?

What is your practical experience of mental care in the community?

I have had family members with dementia, well that's what the GP said it was, but no real test was done then to be certain as its only recently that adults with this condition got some recognition by the Health Service, which was because the media that highlighted the raw deal that adults were/are with this condition was getting in some care homes and indeed hospitals.

Also, I feel that the actions mentioned in the post above can apply to many kinds conditions with adults such as drinking too much alcohol or people on recreational drugs and does not solely relate to people with dementia/mental health/strokes.

mumps wrote: »

This is a public forum and I am just as entitled to comment as you. As someone reaching 60 this year I recognise that not many years ago I would have achieved OAP status this year, the age has changed and now it is SRP. Just like some people come on here and say "I don't want to be described as elderly" I am equally free to say I would rather people described me as old when I reach 60, that is what people have done for most of my life.

Just to reassure you I am not PC in the slightest, my husband is black, we are hitting old age nothing PC or patronising about me.

I don't know your family but I honestly don't see what difference their education, intellect etc has to do with it and I am sorry if it annoys you but it again comes across as you making judgements about people. Is someone born on the same day as one of your relatives older because of their education? No they are not they are exactly the same age, they might be healthier or not, they might be more or less enthusiastic about travel or music or literature but that is up to them it does not make one 70 year old old, another elderly and a third senior.

If you don't like babies it doesn't mean you have never heard comments like "bright as a button" being used in reference to a young child. I have never heard it used about an adult and I think it is patronising. I don't know what your role in healthcare is but I am a manager in healthcare and train and recruit staff, if you used that sort of language about service users in the setting I work in it would be considered patronising and you would receive further training in respect and dignity. If that sort of language was used directly to a service user it could even be considered abusive.

I don't understand what is so significant about your relative sharing your childfree choice, is that some big deal?

You are ignoring most of what I have said and latching on to some small parts. You don't respond to things like where shame comes into it or the reality that they are their ages whatever you think.

I have read the thread but I am leaving now, I only hope that everyone who works with older adults treats them as adults not children.

Well said mumps, what a disgraceful reference from a person in health care to make about adults ‘bright as a button’ which is normally used about young children and certainly ad should not be made about adults that may or may not have mental health conditions.

I had to write to one care home when a similar reference was made about residents in a care home that I used to visit. The matron and a staff nurse of that home said said ‘all our little ones’ how patronising remark was that to make about the adults residents. I wrote the matron confirming that I was unaware that they looked after children in their premises as well as adults. She wrote back saying 'if she and others' in the home made reference to ‘little ones’ it was recognising their friability, how discussing is that to say the least.

Also it is over a hundreds years since this condition was recognised and not until now that some people are getting a little bit of help with it from the professionals.

Fire_Fox

teajug wrote: »

Well said mumps, what a disgraceful reference from a person in health care to make about adults ‘bright as a button’ which is normally used about young children and certainly ad should not be made about adults that may or may not have mental health conditions.

Also it is over a hundreds years since this condition was recognised and not until now that some people are getting a little bit of help with it from the professionals.

It was a completely different relative to the one in the OP so no, that relative does not have any diagnosed nor even suspected disorders of mental health. Stop assuming and judging, stop putting YOUR interpretation on MY words, I don't use that phrase to describe children I would use something a whole lot less flattering if I speak about them at all.

Are certain people on this forum always so spiteful and unwelcoming?

"be as bright as a button (British & Australian)
to be intelligent and able to think quickly"
http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/be+as+bright+as+a+button

"If someone is described “as bright as a button,” it means they are quick-witted. The term comes from the early military uniforms which had metal buttons. The button often needed to be polished and be kept sparkling. It plays on the fact that bright means both clever and shiny."
http://www.grammar-monster.com/sayings_proverbs/as_bright_as_a_button.htm#YxoJvYX5fVpDFLF8.99

teajug

Fire_Fox wrote: »

I don't use that phrase to describe children I would use something a whole lot less flattering if I speak about them at all.

So you do not like children either, in what capacity do you work in health care, I would like to make sure I do not go near that establishment.
:eek:

Fire_Fox

teajug wrote: »

So you do not like children either, in what capacity do you work in health care, I would like to make sure I do not go near that establishment.
:eek:

Wow mature. Feel free to apologise for calling me disgraceful for being complimentary about one of my older relatives.

"be as bright as a button (British & Australian)
to be intelligent and able to think quickly"
http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/...ht+as+a+button

"If someone is described “as bright as a button,” it means they are quick-witted. The term comes from the early military uniforms which had metal buttons. The button often needed to be polished and be kept sparkling. It plays on the fact that bright means both clever and shiny."
http://www.grammar-monster.com/sayin...YX5fVpDFLF8.99

dzug1

Yet again a useful thread degenerates into a useless slanging match

John_Pierpoint

John_Pierpoint wrote: »

Let us define terms:

Dementia is a progressive illness that involves the loss of the ability to:
Reason.
Recall.
Think.
Communicate.
Move about
and then recognise relatives and control bodily functions.

First signs of dementia ?














[FONT=&quot]Does a humour bypass also qualify ?[/FONT]