Maybe it's me that's being unreasonable ?

Somerset

It was a toss up between posting here or the 'vent' board. Atm I feeling annoyed with my OH, actually I'm feeling depressed, but that'll pass. The latest !!!!-up is laying a laminate kitchen floor. It's a tiny kitchen and I admit tricky along the appliances, but you should have seen the different size gaps everywhere where stuff was mismeasured. And what he always says is ''it'll have to do'' - well no it doesn't, it looks the botch it is. Yesterday I asked him to cut a bit off a small shelf, I marked the line he needed to cut to make it fit. He cut a completely different line, for no reason, and it's !!!!!!ed now.

Now you might say ''do it yourself then ''. I would, if he'd just be up-front about things. He'll never say he can't do something. It's always a ''10 minute job '' that's a piece of @@@@. And when I say anything during the 'doing' he accuses me of shouting or being negative - I can just see the mistakes as he does them.

So I either have to keep my mouth shut and pretend it's great when it's not, or there's a row because 'nothing he ever does is good enough'. He takes it as a criticism. It's not. Surely if a person is not good at DIY, then the best thing is to get someone in who can do it right. What is going on ?

Hitch

Those people that are really no good should leave well alone!! Doing things incorrectly can lead to problems later. Even something as simple as a small laminate floor job. Leaving an insufficient gap can lead to your kitchen floor becoming like the Alps!!
Will he let you have a go?? Can you do a joint effort to help each other?

Of if its something hes unsure about, send him to Ultimate Handyman or even here for a few hints and tips.

Somerset

Hitch wrote: »

!
Will he let you have a go?? Can you do a joint effort to help each other?/QUOTE]

We have done things jointly and I am going to have a go ( he's away for a week ). But that's not the thing. What is this macho rubbish that blokes are 'experts' at DIY when they're not. And the ' it'll do '' syndrome when in truth it's a candidate for DIY SOS. What is this blind spot all about ?

I should also say I'm calming down now and I do love him. It's just the DIY botches depress me . After all, everyone wants their home to look good. It truly doesn't bother him if it looks like crap.

plumb1_2

Somerset wrote: »

So I either have to keep my mouth shut and pretend it's great when it's not, or there's a row because 'nothing he ever does is good enough'.

Just like Sex:rotfl: still depressed?

Dont buy him a Doctors set for xmas what ever you do:rotfl:

kickstart_3

But if he is no good at it and you KNOW he is no good, then why do you let him do it in the first place??

Hitch

I guess im lucky not to have problems like that! I sometimes worry about something i have done looking odd, but when you mention it they very rarely even see the problem, let alone how you got around it.

Taking time and using the correct tools often makes for a good job, even if you have limited skills. There are a lot of jigs and things to assist, or even little tricks to do something easily. Places like this and Ultimate Handyman are really helpfull, a suprising amount of tradesmen hang out there, and we are all willing to help out with advise.

Not sure about the macho bit, i guess that depends on you partner!

Bear_family

My dad was exactly the same, my mum ended up doing anything remotely concerning DIY while he was out at the football, and then it took him 2 weeks to notice anyway!
I think it's male pride, men think they should be good at it, and can't understand when you're not ecstactic with their efforts when they're not. Try and praise him for the things he's good at and put the tools under lock and key when you have a job in mind until he's safely out of the way.

Bf

Somerset

kickstart
To avoid a row as in undermining him ( he says )

Hitch
Your key phrase was 'taking time' - he doesn't. He's got no attention to detail. I forgot the Friday thing of chopping off the washing machine plug when it was the fridge we were dumping. Just didn't take the time to check. I MUST add though he rewired the washing machine plug back afterwards.

Bear Family
Sounds like your Dad. Other thing - can you believe the amount of tools/saws/jigsaws etc etc they have ? I think it's a gene thing.

Melissa177

*sigh* - men!

Would he be offended if you enrolled him on a DIY course?

Somerset

Melissa177 wrote: »

*sigh* - men!

Would he be offended if you enrolled him on a DIY course?

Only if he was the tutor :rotfl:

HugoSP

We know a couple where he is almost completely hands off DIY and not ashamed of it, and she is qute handy. Having said that her dad works as a project manager for a large contracting company and has previously worked up the chain as a builder.

She is very good at laying concrete amongst other things. She's in charge with DIY and he's got the sense to do as he's told and it goes well every time.

His attitude is simple. "Why balls it up yourself if you can earn money to pay the professionals?"

Now I am a bloke who can do most things DIY, infact I earn a living part time by doing small jobs etc. However there are jobs that I cannot do, or haven't got the pacience for. One of them is wallpapering. I just don't.

On the other hand, yesterday I fitted a new electric cooker for another handyman. He freely admits that electrics are not his thing. However I will not even touch my own gas connections, even though the law allows me to as I would not be earning from it.

My wife is extremely good at putting up that tinting film on the rear windows of my van. One window was replaced recently and it needs doing. I won't be doing it - I have already got through loads of that film getting it wrong. Ditto with lino - I just can't!

The fact of the matter is we all have our strengths and weaknesses. Occasionally I will have a go at the jobs I struggle with when there is no risk of losing money over it. You never know I may just crack it! However, like the Ops other half. There are some things I am good at and some things I am not.