Spousal Maintenance RPI increase

FBaby

SkintGypsy wrote: »

FBaby, I presume the spousal maintenance is to account for the career the OP didn't build, while supporting her husband's and caring for their joint children? Why does he get the benefit of a huge salary while she lives comparatively poorly after they made joint life decisions about how they would raise their family?

Perhaps she works in a minimum wage role while he is on a Director's salary?

Don't judge without the facts!

This argument always makes me smile. This assumption that if the wife had not had children to look after, she would automatically have built a career and be well off, that the reason she didn't is systematically put down to having no choice but to stay at home and look after the children for the benefit of the husband. It makes me laugh because if there was such prospect for a career and therefore a decent salary, between the two, they would most likely have had enough money to afford childcare so that the wife could continue with her career, as it happens for many couples... it makes me smile that the choice is put down to sacrifices rather than a choice of a much better lifestyle....

In any case, if you read my posts, you will see that my point is not so much about the right or wrong of the spousal maintenance, but the putting a few £££ over a more harmonious relationship with the ex for the benefit of the children.

FYI, I get no maintenance from my kids' dad and haven't for some time, even though I've heard that he is doing some work again... I even pay for all their travelling for them to go and see him. I am not asking for a penny from him, because in the end, I know it will cause massive arguments again, he will say he can't afford it blah blah blah and my kids will pick up on the bad vibes and be affected. I will try to come up with an arrangement if he works full-time again, but in the meantime, for the sake of what would probably come to under £100, I don't think it is worth it as my kids' happiness is worth a lot more than that.

Betsie2010

Dancingfairy thank you for the advice
I too often pay out for my kids for a "quiet" life rather than them have the fall out with inevitably follows from their Dad.
However, this is not an issue re the money so much as the principle that he can ignore the court order at his will and I can only enforce him to comply by going back to Court
But thanks for the feedback

SuzieSue

OP, do you have legal expenses cover with your house insurance? If so, it might be worth seeing if they will cover you.

FBaby

Forget principles, life is not about them but about making the best of a given circumstances and insuring the happiness of those we love.

How much are you to gain from that increase? £10 a month, £100 a month? The satisfaction that he will be a bit lesser well off and not able to afford his 5th holiday?

I too often pay out for my kids for a "quiet" life rather than them have the fall out with inevitably follows from their Dad.

Surely you pay out for your kids because the responsibility to do so is not just that of your ex? Probably wrongly phrased, but it comes out as if you are doing him a favour by doing so.

daska

margaretclare wrote: »

This is usually sorted out at the time of divorce - pension-splitting, lump sum etc. You can't just go on for ever and ever once the marriage is over. You have to look forward and not back.

And obviously this was sorted out at the time of the divorce if the OP has a Court Order for Spousal Support with a yearly increase based on RPI...

turn3r

Would the maintence clause of the divorce still be valid if one of the couple remarries? My husband divorced his wife under scottish law and her maintenance stopped when either she or he remarried, we obviously still pay maintenance for the children. Perhaps this is different in England?

Tropez

To be honest, I can't say I blame him for trying to get the order changed.

According to the Office of National Statistics in November, the average salary rise was 1.4% whereas RPI stood at 3.5% (down to 3.3% at present) and during the time period we're looking at here RPI has been as high as ~5%.

Well paid or not, it is unlikely that his salary has increased in-line with inflation while it is very likely this court order is causing him to be less well-off year on year as the value of his income declines.

However, that said, a court order is a court order and at present, unless and until successfully challenged he has to comply. I'd ask your solicitor about an Attachment of Earnings Order, which will require his employer to deduct some of the maintenance from his pay (usually the extra that would be payable due to inflation).

BitterAndTwisted

My mother got Spousal Maintenance when she was divorced. Back in the good old days when a mother's sacrifice of her independence and career was recognised. She was awarded the princely sum of three quid a week, and it was taxed. And that was everything she ended up with after 20 years of marriage. No cash, no savings, no possessions. Nothing but the clothes she stood up in. Oh, Dad "let her" keep the car. The car which was bought on finance, so she was saddled with the repayments for it. My Dad only paid her £12 a month, so she was robbed of four week's worth of maintenance every year for thirty-odd years. When she died I had a good mind to demand all that money back from him, the stingy old bar-steward. I dearly wish she'd got an RPI increase, she might not have had to work two jobs while raising my youngest sister with the fiver a week he paid for her.