Alchemausterity

HelenDaveKids

im still waiting for knob jokes, wrong sort but still thought funny,,,


A woman visited a plastic surgeon who told her about a new procedure called 'The Knob,' where a small knob is placed at the top of the woman's head and could be turned to tighten up her skin and produce the effect of a brand new face-lift.


Of course, the woman wanted 'The Knob.' Over the course of the years, the woman tightened the knob, and the effects were wonderful, the woman remained young looking and vibrant.After fifteen years, the woman returned to the surgeon with two problems. All these years, everything has been working just fine. I've had to turn the knob many times and I've always loved the results. But now I've developed two annoying problems: First, I have these terrible bags under my eyes and the knob won't get rid of them.'


The doctor looked at her closely and said, 'Those aren't bags, those are your assets.'


She said, 'Well, I guess there's no point in asking about the goatee.'

Alchemilla

Brilliant. Not a rude word in sight.

Secret_Saving_Squirrel

Very excited about the move, sorry about half term though,

Squirrel x

Excellent joke Helen

Alchemilla

£13 on house tarting up budget.

Gally I have been scrubbing muranese glass windows with a toothbrush and bleach. That should make you happy.

http://www.acornsashwindows.co.uk/photo-gallery/timber-repairs-reglazing/reglazing-muranese-glass.html

Windows look strangely bright when they are clean.

DH has foregone chess weekend and no love is greater than that.

Karmacat

Minimal spend and DH at home rather than at a chess tournament - both good

pavlovs_dog

you're making me want to spring clean Al. I'd best lie down until the feeling passes

Tilly_MFW_in_6_YRS

pavlovs_dog wrote: »

you're making me want to spring clean Al. I'd best lie down until the feeling passes

This made me roar with laughter - thank you Tilly x x x x

Alchemilla

I don't want any MFWs harmed during this process.

gallygirl

I'll stay on the sofa to balance the ying and yang . Though I have done over 10,500 steps today :T.

Alchemilla

Whoop! Good stepping GG.

£36 another pressie for DD.