Struggled with debt for 12 years and now at the end of my rope.

DS4215

How many kids have you got between you and how many does your OH have with his ex? If he just had 2 kids with his ex it would be 20% of his wages (roughly £400 per month), but having kids of your own brings that down (can't remember exactly how much though) as does any time you look after his older kids....

spacey2012

For someone who can not control finances bankruptcy prevents them from starting it all over again.
It can be a blessing.
I dont think the OP is grasping that they can fill in a couple of forms, appear at a bankruptcy hearing and the debt is gone, wiped out.
They can still have a simple bank account for wages and direct debits.
Yes they wont get credit, but who is going to lend to someone defaulted on 25K of debt anyway.
OP my advice is explore the bankruptcy option.
The debts will be wiped out, you wont be able to do it again and your wages will be your own to live off.
Or you can knuckle down and spend the next 14 years eating cold beans.

ValHaller

spacey2012 wrote: »

OP my advice is explore the bankruptcy option.
The debts will be wiped out, you wont be able to do it again and your wages will be your own to live off.
Or you can knuckle down and spend the next 14 years eating cold beans.

It is premature to push bankruptcy before the SoA has been explored. For a start, we don't know whether it really is 14 years on cold beans

sparklefrog

What about the IVA route. Is that an option?

cupcake32

I am considering asking my Mum to help us pay off the Payday loans. It's just swallowing my pride and asking. She already helps us out so much so I doubt she'd notice an extra few hundred quid given to us, but still.
I'm really trying hard to become better with money and the situation we are in now scares me so much I don't think I could ever p*** money up the wall again. I think it's changed me forever - which is a good thing.
I'm going to see if I can start doing some ironing or something in the evenings to make some cash for us for we don't have to borrow off my Mum. Other than that I can't see a short term solution to our cash flow crisis. There is literally NOTHING to sell now. We've sold everything we have. I remember last month scouring the house for things to put on ebay to raise some money for food and thinking 'it's all gone'.
Some of the suggestions for reducing our utilities etc are really good but they can't be reduced anymore at the moment. For example, our electric is high because we are in debt to the electric board and are paying it off slowly each month. Although our outgoings are high we are on top of the bills (I know it doesn't sound like it) but 99% of the time they are all paid on time.
I could probably cut down on our grocery bill more if I really tried I suppose. I'll have a serious look at it later tonight.
I know I need to think it through seriously and not make any rash decisions but I'm clutching at spacey2012's posts telling us to go for bankruptcy. I feel like we've paid our dues now and should be able to start again. As I say, we've both struggled with these same debts for about 12 years.

cupcake32

When I say 'start again' I don't mean get ourselves in debt and screw up our lives again! x

kazwookie

How many children do you both have in total?

Are you claiming all the benefits you are entitled to?

ValHaller

cupcake32 wrote: »

I am considering asking my Mum to help us pay off the Payday loans. It's just swallowing my pride and asking. She already helps us out so much so I doubt she'd notice an extra few hundred quid given to us, but still.
I'm really trying hard to become better with money and the situation we are in now scares me so much I don't think I could ever p*** money up the wall again. I think it's changed me forever - which is a good thing.
I'm going to see if I can start doing some ironing or something in the evenings to make some cash for us for we don't have to borrow off my Mum. Other than that I can't see a short term solution to our cash flow crisis. There is literally NOTHING to sell now. We've sold everything we have. I remember last month scouring the house for things to put on ebay to raise some money for food and thinking 'it's all gone'.
Some of the suggestions for reducing our utilities etc are really good but they can't be reduced anymore at the moment. For example, our electric is high because we are in debt to the electric board and are paying it off slowly each month. Although our outgoings are high we are on top of the bills (I know it doesn't sound like it) but 99% of the time they are all paid on time.
I could probably cut down on our grocery bill more if I really tried I suppose. I'll have a serious look at it later tonight.
I know I need to think it through seriously and not make any rash decisions but I'm clutching at spacey2012's posts telling us to go for bankruptcy. I feel like we've paid our dues now and should be able to start again. As I say, we've both struggled with these same debts for about 12 years.

This is so frustrating. Without the payday loans, the DMP can be paid off in about 200 months - but if all your surplus goes to those debts, it is about 100 months (assuming interest stopped). And with some luck and good negotiating, you might see them gone a bit sooner.

But these pokksy PDLs are killing your chances of ever paying back, because they make your debt increase monthly.

I think the strategy has to be

• Come up with a plan to get out of the PDL's within say 6 months
• If there is no viable plan or it does not work, then default on the PDL's and take shelter from the crapstorm
• If the PDL's will not stop interest, then threaten to go bankrupt
• If that has no effect, go bankrupt

For the first step, go over and over your SoA looking for ways to cut down, for things to sell and for ways to increase your income. Look also for expenditure you have missed from the SoA

cupcake32

What would happen if we defaulted on the Payday loans?

cupcake32

kazwookie wrote: »

How many children do you both have in total?

Are you claiming all the benefits you are entitled to?

We have twins of 2 years old. Another on the way.
My husband has two girls aged 14 and 11 from his first marriage

We have looked in to claiming any benefits but apart from Child Benefit we are entitled to nothing.