Kid clutter....

lil.smartie

My daughter is 4 she has carpet, it's pink she chose it, not seen it in a while though... I was just as bad as a kid/teenager/not amazingly tidy now... My mum always told me I used to clear a spot by my bookcase & sit reading as she'd never discourage reading.. Guess what I caught her doing last weekend when she was tidying up... grrr wish I could apologise to my mum I know how she felt now!!
Going to get more boxes but lots got put in the loft last week, oh and total tom-boy so have cars & art stuff!!

Kate

Emmarillo

My daughters are messy (11 and 14) which shouldn't come as a surprise as neither my husband or I are naturally tidy. We have spent years stressing about this, and nothing's worked. We now make sure their rooms get properly tidied and cleaned once a week. The rest of the house I keep tidy and try to make sure that the girls keep their stuff in their rooms. Could you possibly try not to worry about the mess through the week and then blitz it (with her help) at the weekend?

My nephews are immaculate but spend all their time on the computer or watching tv. I know it's frustrating but try to be grateful that you've got a creative and imaginative little girl who can occupy herself happily .

Person_one

fluffnutter wrote: »

Sorry, but I'm not really feeling it. Did people miss the memo that said 'kids = mess'. Although there are exceptions of course, the average five year old's just not going to volunteer to put all their toys away, nor be very good at it when they do. You've got to help them. Make it a game, make it part of their play, have one room in the house that's just for you, i.e. don't let them make a mess in the sitting room.

But seriously? Clutter comes with kids. You're just winding yourself up if you don't accept that.

Thanks, I wondered why this wasn't said in the very first reply!

Children need to play, children playing creates clutter, parents need to put up with it until the children are old enough to be able to do it themselves.

At that point they can start attempting to teach them to tidy up which I believe takes between 3 and 23 years depending on the child.

meritaten

Sorry - but kids do not give a FF if the home is immaculate - their play is messy cos it needs to be, to allow them to explore thier creativity! If you want a home which stays immaculate at all times and begrudge the time spent tidying up after the kids have played or crafted - then perhaps you shouldnt have kids?

Brighton_belle

Tea-and-Cake wrote: »

. My 5yo loves arts and crafts so her carpet and bed is constantly covered in pens, pencil, pencil sharpenings... little bits of paper she has cut out, stickers etc etc she can happily do that for hours. Yesterday ...dressing up clothes, the contents of a board game and fuzzy felt.
I am so tempted to get rid of 90% of their playthings and leave them with about 10 toys each. .

OP when I read this I thought, wow, how wonderful to have such a creative, imginative and healthy little girl, aren't you lucky.
Getting rid of 90% of her things sounds so sad.
However, it's dressing up stuff and crafty stuff that seems to make the most mess, but is in turn a great stimulant for her imagination and would seem a shame to get rid. However, as an adult, I know how easy it is to have too much crafty stuff! You could probably cut back on tht and still have plenty. Can you contain the area it is used more?

I do hear you on she seems to have too much stuff for her or you to cope with. Perhaps you need to look at what she enjoys most and then working with her to let go of stuff she doesn't use: I do think including young children in that process is good so they learn how to let go of what they don't use/need and don't get anxious about stuff they love disappearing mysteriously.
Apart from the crafty stuff which you say she can do for hours (how wonderful!) is her play limited by having too much do you think - is she flitting from one thing to another? That is often an indication of having too much/too much choice.
Is there an excessive flow on bits and pieces carp in to the house that you can limit more effectively? Can you work on doing a cull prebirthdays and xmas when you know more will be coming into the house.
Then create a home for everything that works for her, that she can understand and seems logical to her rather than an adult.

Better_Off_1983

Posts/rants like this make me glad to be childfree by choice.

Children will make a 'mess' it is part and parcel of having children.

Blackpool_Saver

I have never allowed any of my children to use pens/pencils etc on beds, provide child with a table and say if you do not use it all craft toys will be confiscated

pigpen

1 craft box in a cupboard in the kitchen or under the stairs and ALL craft activities restricted to the kitchen/dining room ONLY.

scissors and pencil sharpeners shouldn't really be allowed unsupervised at 5.. my sone when 11 (now 21) 'sharpened' his finger.. just to see if it would apparently! so definitely a risk for a 5 y/o. pens/pencils etc in the bed are also dangerous.. they couldturn over and stab an eye with a pencil and yes I know a child who did this!

If they don't play with the toys get rid, absolutely, they don't need them. I got rid of most of our toys once mine played mostly on consoles/pcs etc.. they have a box of dressing up stuff with a lid and stacks and stacks of books all with bookcase space.

I have lived in a 3 bed house with 8 children, I know what 'restricted space' means and you have to make the best of the space you have.

abis21

My DD sounds similar to yours, only she is 6.5, but over time we have gotten into much better routines.

She is now only allowed 1 'lot' of toys at a time out. So if she is playing with barbies (all kept in a massive tub with a lid on it) and then she decides to play with dolls - then she has to put all barbies away first.

I now have large tubs, and smaller tubs for different things. Eg, felt pens have a tub, crayons have a tub, pencils have a tub, hair bobble have a tub, clips have a tub etc etc. So now she knows 'how' to tidy her things, and she knows the lid must fit on the tub for it to be fully tidied.

If something isn't tidied to your satisfaction, then maybe you could confiscate that 'tub' for a day. I thought at first that I wouldn't like the tubs cluttering up the place - but they are fab cos you can slot them places so on an evening you can't see any of the toys.

Every now and then (usually before/after birthday and christmas, and maybe another 2 times in the year) I go through her things and have a clear out. I sell some things, charity some things and bin some things. I do it when she isn't here - and she has never ever noticed - as I only get rid of the things she doesn't play with any more. That means that the tubs are still able to close and don't overflow.

I think it can be daunting for a 5 year old to know where to start with tidying - so I think having easy systems in place for them to learn how to do it is a great way of teaching them.

notanewuser

FBaby wrote: »

I strongly believe that you are either born tidy or messy.

This.

OP - I was exactly like your daughter at 5.

And 15.

And 25.

And now at 35.

It's in the DNA.

My sister is OCD about tidiness and has one hell of a bleach fetish.