JC staff-how friendly is too friendly?

Calien27

Why I don't live with the father has nothing to do with what I posted, sorry.


The thing is, if he is trying to gather information he is certainly going the wrong way about it, because when he gets chatty (including "is the father still around") I don't actually say anything in regards to my personal life. Sometimes he likes to interject little bits about his life outside of work, like saying his back was sore from something he'd been doing (could have been DIY for all I know, I didn't catch the end of what he said :rotfl:).

Lip_Stick

Maybe he's gleaming you for info, as it's been put, just so he can advise you about future benefits and coming off jsa.

sammyjammy

Maybe he is just being friendly. If you think he has overstepped the mark then tell him, they are (mostly) human you know! When I worked in the Jobcentre 20 years ago we used to socialise in the local pub with those that we had met through signing on, we had a laugh, we were the same age and it had nothing to do with our professional relationship at work. I know few that met their partners through the Jobcentre too.

Those were the days of course, its nothing like that now.

I do however think its wrong if a member of staff uses the information they have available to them in a professional sense for personal gain, as in the case of Bitter and Twisted, that's just plain unprofessional.

Calien27

Thank you all for your input

I will see what (if anything) happens the next time I sign on and as most have advised, just tell him politely

Bitter and Twisted- If you don't mind me asking, what happened in the end, with the adviser that phoned and asked you out? :eek:

Sambucus_Nigra

Take a book and read whilst waiting, so that he can't wink at you.

Be prepared to answer 'is this relevant' at every dodgy question; or take a notebook and at every question you feel is inappropriate; look at your watch, lick your pencil and write down word for word what he has said and your answer.

john539

Calien27 wrote: »

I've been mentally debating with myself for a while about whether or not I should post this, in case I get the "mountain out of a molehill lecture"

It's just kind of odd to me, maybe I am making something out of nothing, but I've never known any of the other advisers at my local JC to be so...friendly towards the people going there.

Please, tell me honestly if I am being a paranoid idiot about this, I won't mind

Yes, it's odd.

Maybe he's misreading signals.
If you give a clear reaction or comment that you are not happy, hopefully he should get it and it will stop.


He's using his power over you.
Harassment can take many forms.

Or a complaint of inappropriate comments should bring him down to earth.

Ask to change advisor.

john539

miduck wrote: »

I honestly see no sign of flirting - telling a lady they are starting to show is hardly a come on! The OP is making themselves feel uncomfortable by thinking too much into it.

No, the JC advisor is in a position of great power & can cause someone serious problems.

That is why I suspect the OP & many others do not challenge inappropriate comments.

Calien27

Thank you both for the helpful answers!

Sambucus_Nigra

Calien27 wrote: »

Thank you both for the helpful answers!

Don't forget to say very loudly 'have you got something in your eye? Perhaps you should go sort it out and I could see a different adviser?'

Calien27

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

Don't forget to say very loudly 'have you got something in your eye? Perhaps you should go sort it out and I could see a different adviser?'

Now that I like :rotfl: