Suspended During Grievance

kelly_borntoshop

the factory manager is the one holding the meeting.

Uncertain

kelly_borntoshop wrote: »

i have 1 child who is 4 - 5 in March, and the other who is 7.

Ok, that hardly helps I'm afraid. As Daisy has pointed out, that gives you certain extra rights for the next month or so. In any case you have to give 21 days notice to exercise this right so it doesn't help with sickness.

kelly_borntoshop

this leaves me unable to meet what they need doesnt it? and my boss still, and always will, have a problem with me.

basically i am up the creek.

zzzLazyDaisy

Uncertain wrote: »

Again, strictly speaking, this is not your employer's problem. (You might need to double check this point if it becomes relevant but I'm 90% certain there is no special dispensation). I'm sure LazyDaisy will know.

That's right. If the father isn't around for whatever reason (and goodness knows there are lots of mothers and children in that situation) it is up to the mother to organise back-up care.

(apologies, not meaning to be sexist towards the single parent fathers out there)

zzzLazyDaisy

kelly_borntoshop wrote: »

this leaves me unable to meet what they need doesnt it? and my boss still, and always will, have a problem with me.

basically i am up the creek.

Well that isn't actually strictly true is it?

You are in no worse a position than the millions of working mothers out there who have to juggle childcare and jobs with little or no help from the father, and better than some.

You have two school aged children, a childminder, a mother who will help in an emergency, after school clubs, holiday clubs. Presumably your little ones have friends whose mums are in the same boat, with whom you could come to some arrangements? And you have an employer who (at least in the past) has been generous with time off for child related issues, and may be again, when they see that you appreciate how lucky you are to have an employer who goes above and beyond what is required of them (I think you do see that now, don't you?).

Yes you may need to eek out your leave allowance so you can take care of your children - that will be the same wherever you work.

Of course if one of your children was seriously ill and you needed cover for two months, then you might have to throw in the towel and stop work, but you aren't there at the moment are you?

You might also want to think about what your mum says, and perhaps look for a part-time job that more easily fits around your childrens' hours? Even then, you have a better chance of finding work if you have a job, and a decent reference, and both will need you to build bridges.

Dx

FBaby

I can really sympathise as I was a single mum working full-time from the time my kids were 18 months and 3 until they were 8 and 11, and even now i am with my partner, I still can't expect him to take time off work if required with the kids as his industry is not parent's friendly, especially when it is not your children and my kids dad only screams his rights when it suits him!

I have to admit that taking each circumstances as they come, I have pushed my kids to the limit... that means that they do go to school unless they are seriously poorly..... my daughter went to school even when she had scarlet fever (not diagnosed until the GP said she was unlikely to be contagious any longer, and indeed no one else in her school got it!). My kids have got used to it. I have left calpol signing a special paper with the school so if required, they can administer it. My 13 yo DD now always keep two paracetamol with her. They don't see themselves as hard done by, they are both desperate to get 100% attendance by the end of the year (so far so good) and so therefore insist themselves going.

I had to take time off when my son had the proper flu (temperature over 40 degrees) and I had to take time off when my dd needed an operation and she still has regular medical appointments. I always let me boss know in advance, and always make up the time one way or the other. The thing is, because he sees that I don't take the time off for granted and always try to make it up, he is indeed showing great flexibility. He is now happy to allow me to work from home on occasions because he knows I do work when I am at home. My children are now 10 and 13 and that have long learnt not to expect anything from me if I'm working at home (they will even prepare their own lunches).

Do go back, jobs are so hard to find at the moment, it will be less demanding trying to save this one then looking for another and if they do agree to have you back, do everything in your powers to show them you are worthy of their trust. The onus is now on you to show you are flexible and grateful so they in turn show you they are prepared to be flexible too. Good luck.

kelly_borntoshop

so really it comes down to what is most important to me?

i could go to another full time job but the same would stand.

i put in for a few jobs last friday when i resigned. i have 2 interview offers though havent touched base properly with them yet. 1 phone call and an email - told them both i am available monday, tues, wed next week.

i have speech therapy thursday (which even when arranging this meeting, my employers knew this and gave me an afternoon time) and friday i could be back at work but i might not be.

one of the jobs is a 10-2 position, same money (still not great with regard to child illness).

so quite possibly, by thursday, with any luck, i could have another job offer.

would any of you stay in my current job with another offer on the table?

zzzLazyDaisy

kelly_borntoshop wrote: »

would any of you stay in my current job with another offer on the table?

None of us can really comment on that.

To be honest 10-2 hours are brilliant for child care as they fit around school hours. If that isn't going to suit you, nothing ever will. NO job is ever going to be 'great' for child illness. It will always be a juggling exercise and things will never be as perfect as you want them to be - that's life. If you really want/need to be there for your children 100%, whenever they need you, then you should either be a stay at home mum, or find something you can do on a self employed basis.

If you DO want/need paid employment outside the home, you need to consider if the new job will be conditional on a good reference from your current employer?

Another things to consider is that you currently have protection from unfair dismissal (and it is probably fear of that which has prevented your current employer from showing you the door). But the law changed in April last year, and you now have to work for an employer for two years before you are covered by the employment protection laws, which basically means they can dismiss you for any reason or no reason at all during that time (provided they don't breach anti-discrimination laws) and they don't have to follow any procedures. They can simply write you a cheque for your notice pay and tell you to collect your belongings on the way out.

Harsh, but true.

Dx

Sambucus_Nigra

kelly_borntoshop wrote: »

I picked up the message from the childminder on my way out the door (i leave at 4.30). the school had informed her she was ill, my childminder was asking to administer calpol and said she had never seen her so poorly. there is a case of scarlet fever at the school and my boss was aware of this also. i left as normal that day, not early.

i told my boss and said i would let her know as soon as possible as to whether i would need time off the next day. which is when she asked me to put a days holiday in.

at this point i wasnt aware of time off for emergency child illness. it was the breaking point for me .

Erm...why would this be the breaking point? Emergency child illness is unpaid leave, so a complete over reaction on your part here.

kelly_borntoshop

ok. i am going to go in with some humble pie. the manager wanted the meeting thursday gone but i said i was trying to get a union to come. that isn't going to happen i have tried quite a few.

so should i call and say that i have had time to think about the whole situation and that i am going to come in on my own, therefore i am happy for the meeting to come forward should he wish?