Any one child families by choice?

LisaLou1982

I grew up as an only child too . I never wished for any siblings and never felt lonely.

coincidentally my dad was married before he met my mum and had 2 children with her that he didn't see . I met my sister after my dad died and whilst it's lovely to have her in my life now, I'm no more or less happy than I was before

Spendless

Watching the sibling relationship has been my very favourite part of parenthood. My sister is 7 years younger than me, so to experience a smaller age gap (3 years) between an older brother and younger sister has been fascinating to observe. Sometimes frustrating, often touching, frequently amusing, but if it's not for you for whatever reason, then it's no-one elses business. For a very few weeks I was broody for a 3rd and then all my reasons not to go for it kicked in but there's been loads of threads about the joys of a third child, I just knew it wasn't for me. Good luck to you, whatever family you end up with.

jackyann

SuzieSue wrote: »

So it is up the parents to ensure that they aren't a burden on their only child. I do not have any children and so will not be a burden to them. The parents of only children need to provide for themselves like I will need to.

Absolutely! But even with well organised care, the emotional roller coaster of seeing parents deteriorate is upsetting, and having someone to share it with is a blessing.
I would not for one moment advocate having more than one child for that reason (!) but simply shared it as a contribution to the debate - really to emphasis the importance of having a good family circle.

lostinrates

balletshoes wrote: »

But Charlie that could happen if you had siblings - how many times on these boards have we seen posts from people who are not in contact with their grown-up siblings at all, have disowned/been disowned by them? Those siblings won't be there to be relied on in the event of a parents passing.

I am terrified of dealing with my sibling in the future when our mother dies. Terrified. Hopefully it's a very long time off, but I have had nightmares about it for years.

lostinrates

jackyann wrote: »

Absolutely! But even with well organised care, the emotional roller coaster of seeing parents deteriorate is upsetting, and having someone to share it with is a blessing.
I would not for one moment advocate having more than one child for that reason (!) but simply shared it as a contribution to the debate - really to emphasis the importance of having a good family circle.

It's my husband primarily I will turn too, then my friends. The 'family' one creates is often the most supportive and loving.

SuzieSue

lostinrates wrote: »

It's my husband primarily I will turn too, then my friends. The 'family' one creates is often the most supportive and loving.

Agreed. You can't choose the family you are born in to and believe me, if I could I would never have chosen any members of my birth family (not even my parents).

Flugelhorn

I am an only child.

It made me desperate to have more than one child (and I went through a lot to have the second - was not straightforward).

My kids say that the role of siblings is to help you cope with parents...

MiddyMum

I have one daughter, and she will be a one and only. I simply won't be able to afford anymore. I take my hat off to people who choose to have lots of children on an average wage.

With that said, I will always feel a little 'niggle' when I walk past mothercare, but as my partner just said to me 'that's window dressing'. I love my daughter dearly, but nothing could have prepared me for how hard parenting is.