Compensation for horrific treatment during a miscarriage NHS?

KiKi

I just want to say that I'm so sorry for the loss of your child. I have no other words for that.

You know this already, but you're grieving, and you're angry. Be as angry as you like, and be angry with the NHS, and be angry with the staff who were unkind or unhelpful, or thoughtless and insensitive. Shout at your friends and cry and do all the things you want to do. There will (even if it doesn't feel like it) come a time when you'll stop feeling angry.

Wait until the anger subsides a little before you pursue anything. You are much more likely to make headway with the hospital in getting an apology if you deal with them when you are feeling less angry. They are more likely to realise you're serious, and not 'reacting'.

And I absolutely agree with you that it's the principle of the way you were treated. Absolutely agree. I also agree that you're unlikely to get anywhere with financial compensation - there are very specific criteria for that to be the case. I think the best 'compensation' you can get is an apology and a recognition of what you went through. It may be best to try that first, then see how you feel.

However, I also recognise that you're probably not ready to hear that just yet. I hope that the results of the post mortem can help you to move on in some way.

How is your husband / partner doing?

DannyBo

OP; sorry to hear about your dreadful experience

As someone else pointed out earlier, you could spend years focusing on the quest for compensation and detract from 'moving on'

My own experience is this: exhaust all avenues re. Pals and ombudsman, be fobbed off - wait for 5 weeks (which is the time they are given to respond to each complaint) and so on.. I have come to my own conclusion that I have no other choice but to sue the NHS, although at the very early stages of my complaint, an apology would have been sufficient.

Because i have gone so far with this whole saga, i am now in the position of not being able to let it go and a mountain has become.

It's a tough call but be prepared for a long slog.

All the best x

Southwark29

So sorry to hear about your bad experiences. That sounds awful.

As other people have said, think about what you want to achieve. I'd bet that you don't really want the money but the recognition that you suffered and they should have done better.

I'm a senior hospital manager and work very closely with maternity and our complaints team. I'd recommend asking for a meeting so they can hear direct from you how it felt and you can ask them direct what they will do to stop it happening to others.

It's important for you to think about what you would have wanted them to do differently, and what they could have done reasonably. They will want to listen and learn.

You could also join their Maternity Services Liaison Committee or patient forum, and raise awareness with them about what should be done better.

fluffnutter

brunettegirl wrote: »

Because they owe us for making a distressing situation a million times worse than it needed to be.

Hospitals don't like having to give money away, been made to do that would make them take more notice and look at their treatment.

Ooh, I'm sorry but you've lost the dressing room with this one.

No one 'owes you' for a distressing situation. You are not 'owed' anything in life. What happened to you was horrible and regrettable, and I hope the hospital conducts a thorough investigation to see what, if anything, they can do differently to prevent something similar happening again. But to suggest they somehow 'owe' you makes you sound grasping and greedy.

Hospitals don't operate on a 'phew, got away with that because we didn't have to cough up so we won't bother investigating' policy. That you think that just shows that you simply don't understand how medical policy or practice works.

But... if you're right, thank God we have generous and altruistic people like you prepared to screw a bit of money out of the NHS just to make sure that others don't suffer equally distressing treatment.

TBH, I think SANDS would help you far more than money.

Courgette

fluffnutter wrote: »

Ooh, I'm sorry but you've lost the dressing room with this one.

No one 'owes you' for a distressing situation. You are not 'owed' anything in life. What happened to you was horrible and regrettable, and I hope the hospital conducts a thorough investigation to see what, if anything, they can do differently to prevent something similar happening again. But to suggest they somehow 'owe' you makes you sound grasping and greedy.

Hospitals don't operate on a 'phew, got away with that because we didn't have to cough up so we won't bother investigating' policy. That you think that just shows that you simply don't understand how medical policy or practice works.

But... if you're right, thank God we have generous and altruistic people like you prepared to screw a bit of money out of the NHS just to make sure that others don't suffer equally distressing treatment.

TBH, I think SANDS would help you far more than money.

Her baby died. Can you not manage a little bit of kindness? Screwing money out of people? Her heart is completely and utterly broken and she needs that to be acknowledged by the people who she trusted to care for her.

In my own experience of pregnancy loss, medical staff could all do with showing a bit of compassion at times. The thing that scares me most about losing another baby is dealing with the after 'care'.

I'm not saying that going down the suing route is necessarily the way to go but I am saying there's no need to be so harsh to a grieving mother

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Money won't solve anything. With the big profile cases, the usual outcome is that the staff concerned at the time are long, long gone - the junior doctors have become consultants somewhere else, the nursing or midwifery staff have left, the managers are completely different. All that's left for the person sueing is a cheque, a whole load of unpleasant memories being dragged up everywhere and, unfortunately, usually a destroyed marriage due to the stress and strain of focusing on making somebody else pay for the loss.

I'm not saying this to put you off, I am sure that it was an awful experience that was not helped by the staff's attitude. But the strain of focusing on trying to get somebody to accept responsibility isn't good for anybody. And, sadly, as there was nothing to be done for your little one, and you haven't suffered permanent physical injury as far as I can tell, there's in all probability little chance of success - as the main loss you have, the pain you have is from the loss of your child.



I know where I worked that some of the midwives just couldn't handle women with late miscarriages or stillbirths. They just didn't know what to say or do. And some were angels and some complete cows. Doctors were often worse in some ways, they really didn't like not being able to do 'anything', and so would avoid the patient as much as possible. But some were fantastic, would hold hands, etc, some wouldn't be big on words, but would do everything they would for a later term baby.



The Post mortem results may be back, but they may not, it depends on the number that have to be performed in any area. It requires a specialist to perform the PM, plus there may be various tests that need to be completed.

If that is the case, you may need to make a further appointment when they are received - I really wouldn't recommend having them posted to you - or have them taken/posted to your GP and they will go through the results with you (even if you don't feel you can look at the first, they'll be fine with opening the envelope for you).


It may be that once you have your appointment that you have some satisfactory answers - you may not - but I hope that you leave the appointment at least feeling that somebody does understand, as having somebody acknowledge how awful a loss is seems to be the point at which a lot of ladies and their partners begin to adjust.


And, I hope I don't upset you unnecessarily, but in case you ever wonder what happened, I also undertook work experience in the hospital mortuary. (edited in case it's too much to read right now - highlight to read) The babies, no matter how tiny they were, were treated with so much tenderness and respect. They were individually swaddled in a blanket each and when somebody arrived to collect them, whether to go for PM or for the funeral, they were picked up gently and handed over just as somebody would a sleeping child. So whatever happened before, once your little one was transferred, there were people who showed they cared, even though you couldn't see them do it.

pinkshoes

brunettegirl wrote: »

I have no idea where to post this question really?!

I had a late miscarriage so had to deliver the baby via induced labour without going into too much gruesome detail the hospital did not give me drugs after agreeing that they would let me have whatever i wanted to reduce the pain - I got nothing till the end when the umbillican cord had got stuck and tools were needed to remove it.

I very much believe that if they had given me drugs at the begining of the labour like i asked I would of been much more relaxed and the cord would not of got stuck causing more problems and hemoraging.

Is this something I can claim compensation for? I have written a 4 paged letter complaint to the hospital and awaiting a response.

Opinions on this would be great please. My whole treatment was horrible and awful and very little compassion or support or niceness really.

We were made to wait longer for the inducing because they were too busy with labouring mums the night midwife told us!!!!!

Sorry for your loss.

Unfortunately, maternity wards are very over-stretched, and it's not always possible to have the drugs we want and need.

If there are lots of people who require an anesthetist for birth, then they are prioritised, and not everyone will get one.

Inductions are fitted in as and when spaces become available. The only way round this is to go private.

Money will not solve your sorrow. It will only limit resources in the maternity unit.

You need to find a different way to move on with your life. It was a horrific experience, but you need to move on.

fluffnutter

Courgette wrote: »

Her baby died. Can you not manage a little bit of kindness? Screwing money out of people? Her heart is completely and utterly broken and she needs that to be acknowledged by the people who she trusted to care for her.

Of course she does. Does that need to be financial? Perhaps I should assume that her oddly worded posts are as a result of her grieving but personally, if I'd lost a baby in such tragic circumstances, I wouldn't be on the internet asking how to get compo out of the NHS.

Courgette

brunettegirl wrote: »

Because they owe us for making a distressing situation a million times worse than it needed to be.

Hospitals don't like having to give money away, been made to do that would make them take more notice and look at their treatment.

brunettegirl wrote: »

I know that the money won't help and it won't bring the baby back, its not about that its the PRINCIPLE here.

Maybe this is reading like I expect thousands of pounds or something which I DON'T.

In all honesty £50 (would pay the parking fees!)

fluffnutter wrote: »

But... if you're right, thank God we have generous and altruistic people like you prepared to screw a bit of money out of the NHS just to make sure that others don't suffer equally distressing treatment.

To me, it desn't read at all like someone who is trying to 'screw money out of the NHS', it sounds like someone who feels their terrible pain needs to be acknowledged especially by those who were there and I still maintain that your comment sounded really nasty.

As I said previously, I'm not sure financial compensation is the way to go. A little bit of compassion from those who are charged with your care however goes a very long way

VK-2008

i would tend to agree with the majority there is no point claiming compo - you were not exactly majorly out of pocket (plus to many people claim when there is no need - look at car accidents/minor bumps for example and people wonder why premiums are rising)

i feel for you and the situation you went through, but what i would maybe do like you have done is complain about the experience you had, turn it into a postive so the management know what you went through so no one else has to go through the same

it is a sad situation but give yourself time to grieve, dont rush in to having another child to replace the one that died, take time, let your body rest and then look to the future