Hormonal at 9!!

jockettuk

thanks.. my local doctors surgery has books for boys as well lol.. its quite graphic as shows you how they change lol my daughter picked one up as well and the questions i got asked lol... if you would like me to pick you one up i can if they have some left.. if you want one i will go up doctors and look and then email you for a address

Queenie

Mumstheword wrote:

jockettuk....you must have done a very good job with explaining everything for your little girl to be so excited, and un phased, well done!

Now then, I've got 3 BOYS....any advice?!!!!

When my eldest three reached the magic 13 (they are now in their 20's) I made them all a "teenage survivial kit" ... for my son's I bought them a book called:
"Living With A Willy" ... don't know if it's still in print, but I *can* tell you this much ... we still giggle about it today; my boys still say to me "Oh the day I took *that* to show my mates caused a right stir! They couldn't believe my Mum had bought it for me. Hope we're as open as you, Mum!"

You could try tracking it down via Amazon and the like, if that idea is one you agree with (don't want to offend anyone's sensitivities)

Savvy_Sue

Mumstheword wrote:

Now then, I've got 3 BOYS....any advice?!!!!

From one sufferer to another!

1. Be very grateful they'll never come home and say "Mum, I'm pregnant."

2. Make it very clear to them that DEATH would be preferable to coming home and saying "Mum, I've got this girl pregnant."

Savvy_Sue

Queenie wrote:

When my eldest three reached the magic 13 (they are now in their 20's) I made them all a "teenage survivial kit" ... for my son's I bought them a book called:
"Living With A Willy" ... don't know if it's still in print, but I *can* tell you this much ... we still giggle about it today; my boys still say to me "Oh the day I took *that* to show my mates caused a right stir! They couldn't believe my Mum had bought it for me. Hope we're as open as you, Mum!"

You could try tracking it down via Amazon and the like, if that idea is one you agree with (don't want to offend anyone's sensitivities)

Living with a Willy is indeed available on Amazon ...

pavlovs_dog

Savvy_Sue wrote:

From one sufferer to another!

1. Be very grateful they'll never come home and say "Mum, I'm pregnant."

2. Make it very clear to them that DEATH would be preferable to coming home and saying "Mum, I've got this girl pregnant."

i think you were joking in point number 2, but having graduated from the whole painful teenage thing in the past year or so, can i just take this chance to reiterate that when it comes to teaching your child the facts of life, the most important thing is keeping an open channel of communication, making them aware that they can talk to you about ANYTHING, no matter how potentially embarrassing or life changing.

to give you a personal experience....

as i have previously mentioned, due to my mum's awkwardness, i was too embarrassed to tell her when i started my periods, a time when i needed her more than ever.

although far from being prudish or shy around other people, sex and bodily functions are something that, even today as a young and confident woman, i cannot discuss with my mother...and the problem here is her old fashioned and prudish mindset.

i was about 15/16 when i had my first boyfriend that i saw on a regular basis. he was quite pushy to take things further, but i wasnt that serious about him, and so stood my ground, never letting him get further than i wanted to go. my mother however, was adament that i was sleeping with him (even though he was probably the last person in the world i would have trusted with my virginity). and would frequently quiz me about what we had done, point the finger at me and accuse me of pregnancy etc. in the end she stoppped me seeing him (i wasnt particularly bothered on an emotional level - i wasnt all that attached to him, just at that age, its important amongst your peers to have someone to call your own. on a matter of principal however, it was the start of the downfall in the mother-daughter relationship that still is far from healed).anyway, keeping on topic...

boys came and went, again nothing serious, but a few years later, i met my first true love, and fell head over heels for him. i knew that he was the one i wanted to give my virginity to...however i also knew i didnt want to get pregnant for at least another decade. BUT i was so filled with a sense of stigma from my mother about sex, that it gave me an incredible paranoia - you almost feel that simply looking at a willy would be enough to impregnate you, or that there were 'commando' sperm that could penetrate any barrier you put in their path (needless to say i didnt trust condoms) :rotfl:

as it happens, it was around this time i had enough and moved out. so there i was, faced with taking responsibility for my sexual health, and at the time when i could have really done with some mother-daughter support, i had none. and when i went to the doctor to go on the pill, the support i got there was lacklustre at best. rather than creating an approachable environment where young people were commended for taking responsibility for their sexual health (and the repercussions that may go with that), i was made to feel...well, slutty. :eek:

and after all that, i only ever did go 90% of the way with the guy that i wanted to share my first experience of sex with, because of all the psychological baggage i inherited from my mother. to this day, mother still cannot and will not accept that all boyfriend number one got was a kiss and the occasional fumble. so theres no chance of her ever accepting the fairytale ending to this story, that the gorgeous hunk who eventually deflowered me happened to turn out to be the man i plan to wed and have copious amounts of children with

we've all been kids, we've all been through the awkwardness of your body doing all these things that you dont know how to control. yes, with hindsight (once you learn whats going on and the 'fun' that goes it) it is something you can look back on and laugh. but at the time it is painful. why should you have to wait until your late teens/early twenties to be able to look back on it and laugh? start now:


be honest
be frank
be prepared to laugh and joke about it

trust me, your kids will thank you one day.

Poppy9

I think the best place for contraceptive advice is the Family Planning clinic. They provide a much better service than GPs because the specialise in this subject. They need to publise more their location and opening hours though.

jockettuk

depends on your gp .. our gp surgery is fantastic and im sure when the time is right for my daughter to want to go down that aisle so to speak they will be helpful.. i will always be on hand for my daughter to come and speak to .. in fact we were down the sanitry section of tescos the other day showing her what they all are and so she will be prepared when her periods start.. when she gets sexually active.. oh around the age of 30 will be ok lol i will be on hand to advise her and help.. if its under 16 god help the boy lol she has a dad and stepdad lol

my mother told me when i started my periods thats it dont go near boys lol i found most of my knowledge from the playground.. fortunalty i found out the truth sooner rather than later lol

Poppy9

jockettuk wrote:

oh around the age of 30 will be ok lol

30's a bit young - 35 at the earliest I would say;)

With the FPC you get to see a counsellor first who will take a bit about your options and anything else you wish to raise, then a nurse, then a Dr - usually female. I think they give much more info to youngsters who are unsure of what to expect and maybe a bit shy of talking to family GP.

Iona_Penny

My daughter was 10 when she started her periods (actually to counter previous observations she is now 14 and 5' 9'' I understand puberty onset can be judged by how soon they loose baby teeth which in turn is related to skeletal length??) Anyway my advice would be to get a pretty zip-up toilet bag and put in a san. towel of the smallest and thinnest kind and a clean pair of knickers and a poly bag for dirty stuff for her to keep in her school bag and do it sooner rather than later. Although she was at home when her period started my daughter had known for a while that if it happened at school she could deal with it without telling a teacher and so avoid embarrasment (yes I know it shouldnt matter but to them it does) She also knew that should it happen to any of her friends she could help them out and so made her feel good rather than bad about the whole thing.
When it did start I said she could be upset and not do the things she wanted or learn to deal with it and carry on which she did- I was very proud of her as it is a mad age to cope with something they couldnt dream up in a bad dream!

mariauk

Poppy9 wrote:

30's a bit young - 35 at the earliest I would say;)

With the FPC you get to see a counsellor first who will take a bit about your options and anything else you wish to raise, then a nurse, then a Dr - usually female. I think they give much more info to youngsters who are unsure of what to expect and maybe a bit shy of talking to family GP.

I also think FPC can be better for some young people as it isn`t as "personal" as your local Gp but the service is great. You may have to wait a while sometimes but our local FPC has a great bunch of people working there and make the nervous feel at ease. I made an appointment for and went with my daughter to show her where it was and give her some support(which she was glad of) I will be eternally grateful that our relationship is open enough for us to have done this together. You can only inform and support your children at this time in there lives and hopefully then, they maybe able to make an informed decision rather than jumping in at the deep end! Brook Clinic have always been a great place for young people to. Sorry I went a bit off topic there :rolleyes: