Not sure what to do....

Any

moreofthegoodstuff wrote: »

I don't want to sound heartless but I just feel bad on my husband because his family helped us loads and they probably couldn't really afford it either but insisted.

If it was completely down to me I would write it off in a heart beat.

And????
Your mother doesn't have the basics, but you worry she must match what others are giving you?
If you feel like YOU (not her) need to match your OH and his family in contributions toward YOUR life, get yourself a bar job!!!

lika_86

McKneff wrote: »

Your mum (after your husband, of course) if the priority here.

Interesting order of priority, I would always put family first when it comes to something like this, particularly given that they supported me for 20+ years and continue to.

OP - Write it off. Your mum's need to buy a washing machine etc is greater than your need to buy a house asap. If you were so desperate to buy a house then you shouldn't have had a wedding you and your OH couldn't afford by yourselves.

Stephb1986_2

Maybe sell your wedding dress and keep the money rather than asking your mum for it? She's having a bad run of luck at the moment why should she go without a car, washing machine etc just so you can have a dress for one day???

I'm getting married myself my folks have said they will give us £500 to put in the wedding budget (we've got it fully paid for out of our own pocket already) but it's if we want anything extra etc, my h2b's family haven't mentioned it at all. If my folks suddenly had to repair something or get a new washer I wouldn't be accepting the money off them.

What's more important money or family???

Brighton_belle

If it's your mum that pushed you both into getting married, point out to your DH that he now has a wonderful wife thanks to his m-in-law and surely he can't regret that, for the sake of the last £400.;)

moreofthegoodstuff

Feeling relieved to have phoned and said not to worry about it. I would rather have worked every extra weekend possible for a couple of months than have her worry about it. I didn't want to take the dress money to start with but she insisted and then the car broke down and I couldn't help but feel bad with my husbands families contribution considering they don't have a lot. I hope things seem a bit brighter for her now.

ognum

moreofthegoodstuff wrote: »

Feeling relieved to have phoned and said not to worry about it. I would rather have worked every extra weekend possible for a couple of months than have her worry about it. I didn't want to take the dress money to start with but she insisted and then the car broke down and I couldn't help but feel bad with my husbands families contribution considering they don't have a lot. I hope things seem a bit brighter for her now.

Well done, I am sure she feels much better and so do you so all good!

moreofthegoodstuff

Sometimes you just need someone to tell you what you know you need to do, plus it made me feel a lot less guilty when I showed the responses to my husband, he was just like 'phone her...' We're not some horrible money grabbing pair I just didn't want to upset anyone.