Divorcing soon, how much can i expect to get from house

caroleann

Hi, My husband left us on !st March, not telling anyone where he was going, since then he has'nt been in touch and has'nt contributed to the house/ daughter/or bills, including the £731.50 per month mortgage, my solicitor says I can expect 2/3rds of the equity and the house is now sold, he wont get a solicitor so it's difficult to liase with him, will have to send documentation to his work address.
Can anyone give me any advice on how to get through this nightmare situation and what I can expect help wise from him?
We have found him now sharing a room in a house, he does'nt know we know where he is.
Its a tricky one I know.
Carole

Little_Miss_Saver

Hi there (((hugs to you and your family))

My only advice to you would be to visit your local CAB and/or solicitor if you have one.

I recently split from my now ex-OH and the CAB have been wonderful and exceptionally helpful. They gave me lots of "easy to understand" leaflets and put me in touch with a local solicitor for advice on the options we had about our house (it different as we were not married).

Not much advice I know and you may have already done this.

Good Luck and I hope that you can get this sorted swiftly and amicably.

LMS xx

Tam_Lin

Hi Carole - how did you manage to sell the house without the signature? Was it in your name only?

Good luck with this.

ravenfire_2

What a nightmare for you. Sorry I have no solid advice to offer on this but I just hope things get sorted for you. Good luck

back2square1

I got two thirds from sale of my house, however I could have got more. Do not worry if your husband chooses to not have a solicitor because he is under no obligation to get one. If he chooses to not get legal advice then he is a fool to himself.

As he left and has not contributed to house this will taken note of when the financial settlement is sent to the court for it to be signed off. The courts will look at what equity there is, both of your situations and circumstances and how much both of you need to live on, ie you will need more money to buy a house if you have children living with you because you will need a larger house.

It sounds to me that your ex husband isn't that bothered about what he gets out of the financial settlement because if he did he would have instructed a solicitor by now.

back2square1

Don't worry about ex husband correspondence address as long as he receives the letters regarding divorce etc then that is what is important. Maybe your solicitor could request a correspondence address to use throughout the divorce procedure whether that be his work address, parents address or shared house address.

I used my parents address for all correspondence whether it be from solicitor, bank or work because it was convenient whilst I did not know where I would be living in a years time.

peterbaker

back2square1 wrote: »

I got two thirds from sale of my house, however I could have got more. Do not worry if your husband chooses to not have a solicitor because he is under no obligation to get one. If he chooses to not get legal advice then he is a fool to himself.

Not necessarily, he might feel able to deal with the paperwork and negotiaton himself when it comes to it...

...

It sounds to me that your ex husband isn't that bothered about what he gets out of the financial settlement because if he did he would have instructed a solicitor by now.

Not necessarily ... he might be waiting to see what develops, and again (like me) he might feel quite able to deal with it when he needs to without paying a lawyer for anything other than helping to dot the i's and cross the t's at the end.


My OH spent a good £2000 on three different lawyers. I spent £250.

I also spent time in a bedsit although I have my own place again now. In my case I happened to be able to juggle finances well enough to be able to pay the mortgage on my childrens home for three years after I left right up to the divorce itself. But not everyone has the knowledge or wearwithal to be able to do that.

I had to fight hard to get one third of the net assets. Mothers have it easy when it comes to the money side if they are sitting tight in the home. You might not think so now (I know it isn't easy for a mother of young kids on her own) but a two thirds / one thirds split is not an immediately fair start point especially since the ex husband will be paying a proportion of income too.

My ex-wife sorted herself out a new husband and was married within the year after the divorce. His kids were grown so he got 50% out of his old marriage.

Net result, my ex, my kids and their step Dad live in a nice big comfy 4 bed house (always have) mortgage-free I think with money in the bank too! and I live in a mortgaged studio flat not much bigger than a hotel room. I pay them 20% of my income, and I have the kids for 130 days out of 365 every year too (I share a bed with my son when they are with me).

Now then, was I a fool to myself by not paying a lawyer thousands to better the two thirds / one third deal? I think not. It's a forgone conclusion for us non -multimillionaires when there are kids involved and they stay primarily with their mother. Was I a fool to myself for continuing to pay a £500 per month mortgage even whilst unemployed (by offset from my new borrowings and offset mortgage arrangements) yeah probably, but then I have a heart. Was I a fool to myself to throw in redundancy money to the joint assets pot for a job I didn't even take up until I left home - yep probably - UK new-millenium-man would have hidden that away somewhere. Not me. She ended up with two thirds of my redundancy payment too:-)

Family law in the UK is an a*ss, which means the OP has absolutely nothing to worry about (apart from the significant trials of bringing up a child alone of course).

back2square1

Not all people can manage a divorce by themselves without seeking legal advice. I got two thirds but he had an affair and caused the breakdown of our marriage, that was his choice not mine. He decided to have affair and no longer live with his children.
Not everyone does get two thirds however I did and I know other mothers who did too and some even got alot more. I understand Peter Bakers frustration as to how his ex wife now lives but I am still on my own after 2years separated living in a 3bed house whilst my ex husband drives around in a nice Mercedes compressor sport, lives in a nice 4bed house by himself and had a string of girlfriends - so he's hardly struggling.

peterbaker

back2square1 wrote: »

Not all people can manage a divorce by themselves without seeking legal advice. I got two thirds but he had an affair and caused the breakdown of our marriage, that was his choice not mine. He decided to have affair and no longer live with his children.
Not everyone does get two thirds however I did and I know other mothers who did too and some even got alot more. I understand Peter Bakers frustration as to how his ex wife now lives but I am still on my own after 2years separated living in a 3bed house whilst my ex husband drives around in a nice Mercedes compressor sport, lives in a nice 4bed house by himself and had a string of girlfriends - so he's hardly struggling.

Yeah but if the kids are still under 18 (or 21 ... who knows when the notional liability ends) you still get at least 20% of his income, despite getting two thirds of all the assets when you split, don't you?

PS Mother getting 66.6 and ex-husband getting 33.3 has nothing whatever to do with penalising an adulterer. Forget that. Divorce settlements for the common man or woman should not be tainted with thoughts of revenge. Divorce is rife in our country and marriage takes two to succeed. The start point should be 50/50 irrespective of kids. Then both parents should behave responsibly thereafter with separate lives but children in common to be nurtured and supported. Where is the motivation for absent fathers to do the right thing? The only common motivation I see practised in the UK is that of mothers to treat a divorce as a financial windfall opportunity justified completely wrongly by thoughts of revenge or 'I damn well deserve it'.

Not a very pretty picture of UK society, and one about as ugly as a mother of a 3y old serving on a warship thousands of miles away. Hopefully she can afford to stay a bit closer to home and be involved with her child now though!

thesaint

peterbaker wrote: »

<snip>Net result, my ex, my kids and their step Dad live in a nice big comfy 4 bed house (always have) mortgage-free I think with money in the bank too! and I live in a mortgaged studio flat not much bigger than a hotel room. I pay them 20% of my income, and I have the kids for 130 days out of 365 every year too (I share a bed with my son when they are with me).

<snip>

Although the starting point is 20% of your income, you should be receiving a reduction for every night that you have your children, are you not receiving this?

MJMum

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