He owes me money but won't pay up!!!!!

Princesspearl

I took his name off the house account back in May 2009. The only things that link us are the 2 mortgage accounts and the deeds to the house. We have no joint credit cards, loans, store cards, nothing.
The CCJ came about because of an unpaid loan that he took out in his own name. He took the loan out with our mortgage lender and then defaulted on the repayments. Instead of the repayments coming out of his own person account (there was no money in there to pay) the payments came out of the house account which at the time had his name on. The account where only I was paying money in.
In all of this time I have never let the mortgage go unpaid or missed any payments for it. even if it meant borrowing money from my personal credit card, savings, parents.
I have all the court papers from the CCJ and they do state that he is responsible for the debt but I had to be kept informed as my name is on the deeds to the house.
Even all our utility bills are in my name only as I don't want to be linked to him!!!

Errata

You seem to have a problem. You've tolerated his financial behaviour for six years without doing anything about it.
Try and claim off him what you think you're entitled to and he could very easily turn round and say you condoned it by taking no action to remedy matters during those years.

Person_one

Princesspearl wrote: »

I have all the paper-trails/bank statements to track his lack of financial support within the relationship, but I do know that the bottom line may be that as he's not man enough to admit that he left me to pay the bills and the mortgage, he won't be man enough to admit he owes me anything.

Sorry, but he doesn't owe you anything.

How you work out finances within a relationship is up to the two of you, and if you aren't happy with it you have to sort it out or end the relationship, not carry on but tot up what you think he should have been paying so that you could claim it when you break up!

You remind me a little of my ex who, when I was made redundant, wanted to keep a record of what 'my half' of all the expenses would have been so that I could pay it back when I got a job.

It certainly doesn't sound like he's been perfect, but he's actually right here, you can't ask him for six years worth of financial responsibility in a lump sum!

FBaby

You seem to struggle to understand that when you have a partner who doesn't contribute to his/her share financially, whatever arrangements you have in place, the only recourse you have is to get out as soon as you realise it is going to become detrimental to you as an individual. You don't get to close your eyes to it for years and then expect them to pay back what they should have. The law doesn't allow for it.

You are clearly very angry with the situation, hence you wanting what you think you are owed, but it would appear as if you have allowed it to go for way too long. You might have decided to give him the benefit of the doubt, hoping to save your relationship etc..., but that was your choice.

You need to move on and be grateful that you won't lose out more in the coming years.

getmore4less

you may also be stuck on the CCJ charge on the house,

If the house is sold and there is equity the debt gets paid from the proceeds.

It's the down side of joint and own accounts with the same lenders they usualy contain setting off clauses.

pinkshoes

Could you offer him a lump sum of cash to have his name taken off the deeds of the house (i.e. you buy him out), and in return you will sign a document saying you won't sue him for the £21000 he failed to pay towards the mortgage? Might be worth a try at least.

Ultimately, it's just money, and your sanity is more important, so just sell the house, take your half, and walk away. £21k is a small price to pay to be rid of such a loser!

Frogletina

On MSE there is often a debate about who pays what into a 'house' fund. Some split that 50/50 - others shares may be inequal amounts based on what people are earning. But would it be acceptable if the person only paying the lower share was asked to take a lower share of the equity in the house if they split?

I think everything depends on trust. Even if there is an agreement as to what would happen at the end of a relationship in reality due to the emotions involved and peoples circumstances, things may turn out differently.

I supported my partner for 3 years while he went to university and after one year he decided he wanted us to split up but still remain in the house until he graduated.

As agreed, I kept details of what the costs were, including his share of the mortgage. I was lucky that he kept to his word and paid me what was owed but as it was just an agreement between us I was sure I would have no way of enforcing it.

Padstow

“The bottom line is that couples should not assume that the legal pieces of paper that show co-ownership of a property are the end of the story. If one of them goes on to make a different arrangement, for example moving out or not paying the mortgage then the court can and will adjust the original shares."

http://www.irwinmitchell.com/news/Pages/Landmark-Ruling-Brings-Long-Awaited-Guidance-On-Rights-Of-Unmarried-Couples.aspx

ETA.Suggest taking the ruling to your solicitor, some are woefully behind the news.

globetraveller

A relative went through the same thing. There was nothing she could do about it and she did really look into it. They weren't even married. This is in Scotland by the way. She has learned the hard way. Sorry you are in the same situation.

marisco_2

Princesspearl wrote: »

He says that it's just tough luck andd shrugs his shoulders.

You can ask him for the money he has failed to contribute. Going by the above I doubt very much you will ever see a penny of it though. Legally it would be very difficult to prove unless you drew something up with a solicitor years ago and can prove he hasn't stuck to it. Thank god you have seen through him now and he wont get away with stinging you financially any further.

Being out in the big wide world and standing on his own two feet, without you there to support him, is going to come as one almighty shock to his system isn't it