'supporting each other through really tough times'

Uniscots97

Hello everyone, sorry not been about I needed a few days to myself. DIY friend (who's a lot older than me) has found out her daughter is expecting (her daughter is 24). I just can't get excited for her, is that bad? I keep wishing it was OH and I. Every time we think about it, one of us loses our job . This girl quit her job a few weeks ago and her other half (who is my age and I went to school with! He also had a child when he was 16, meaning that child is now 21! :eek:...... oh and guess what neither my friend or her daughter know!) doesn't work either and are expecting my friend to help with EVERYTHING! My friend's poor husband (not my friend's daughter's dad) is freaking out as he knows they are going to be expected to babysit every weekend (At the moment the daughter borrows money.....hundreds at a time...never pays it back and expects her Mum to look after her dog half the week, which means my friend driving through to get it as her daughter doesn't drive and neither does her boyfriend). Why on earth are !!!!less people like that allowed to have kids??? Sorry I'm having a rant.


Still job hunting and thats getting me down too.

fuddle

Kezlou it's good to read it from a parent's perspective.

I wonder if that horrible word beginning with 's' is a Northern thing? I too heard it a lot growing up. It has such negative connotations attached to it. So derogatory.

Had a great day on the sledges. It's pretty much thawed now but lovely free fun to be had this morning.

Off to pop in the bath, sit with a cuppa, annoy DH while he's trying to watch Blackadder and knit in the round my snood as a practice for knitting on circular needles. I wouldn't have it any other way on a winters Saturday night.

Will check out that forecast 2tonils, thank you.

[Deleted User]

WESTCOASTSCOT if ever we needed a story with a happy ending I believe you have just given us grounds for hope!!! How wonderfully uplifting to hear that your lovely son with help from his Mum and family has overcome all his problems and flown so high and become such a successful person. Thank you so very much for sharing that with us all, it must be a beacon of light to all of us with littlies with problems. You must be a brilliant and diligent Mum, well done all of you. You must be so very proud, Cheers Lyn xxx.

ginnyknit

WCS thats amazing, what great success. We were told, when Dd was 7, by a specialist at her school that she would never achieve anything - honestly those were his words. I walked out saying 'watch this space mate because she will prove you wrong!' They said her dyslexia was so bad no one would employ her, further education would be impossible, she wouldnt drive and not be able to do sports. Hmmm lets see, she kept herself employed from 15 years old, got several belts at karate, went to college to train as a chef and is the most amazing daughter and Mummy. She faces challenges head on and usually succeeds.

Grandma, I like the waistcoat, thats a very interesting theory. He does have a problem with accepting the space he is in and wanders a lot. I think I may run up a waistcoat and put some weights in it for a trial. I can see it easing his tension :j:j:j thank you so much x

sevenup01

so many interesting points of view on childrren with special needs. My old school friend has a son who is only 3 months younger than my son. He is high functioning autistic and was placed in a special needs nursery as it was felt by my friend that a special needs school would be best just because it was 'special needs'
We found that it was actually more disabling for the child than a mainstream school. He behaviours and mannerisms (hand flapping etc) became so much worse there. He was then placed into a mainstream primary with a one to one support worker where he improved amazingly and now he attends a mainstream secondary school with a 'special needs unit' but is mostly in the mainstream classes.
I am home schooling my youngest as i really dont think much of education in schools but thats another issue entirely.

kezlou

Westcoastscot - what a lovely story, i honestly had tears in my eyes reading it. So proud of your son Oh and you for supporting him so much :T:T. I told my OH and he said just wow thats brilliant.

I'm quite lucky with my children especially ds2, he doesn't have any physical disabilities i.e wheelchair / crutches so we were able to give a comprehensive argument for mainstream schooling.Can't imagine what it have like any other way.

We haven't even thought of secondary school, were literally playing it by day by day.

DS1 hopefully get support and assessed for dyslexia, our problem is that we home schooled in terms of teaching him English, Maths etc. Simply because the primary school failed him badly, and i was sick of it. They wouldn't test him for dyslexia as they said he wasn't bad as the other kids in his class. But he fits all the symptoms frustration, mental block etc he's basically the same as his dad. I was told we were bad parents when he was y4 because i said no to the school books, honestly he was given one line books that said "the cat sat on the mat". ds1 instead took in "the lion, the witch and the wardrobe". the teachers were shocked that he read all by himself, but still they wouldn't move him up.
So he went into Y5 a level 1/2 in his subjects, his Y5 teacher saw him reading a harry potter book and asked if he could read to her.
Lo and behold he went straight from a L1 in english to level 3, left Y5 with high Level 4's. At the end of Y6 he left with Level 5's and scored the highest results for Maths and Science in the whole of school. All it takes is one teacher to sit down and listen to a child, then suddenly things change. DS1 was badly bullied throughout primary school and was woodhead (one of the nicer names). It really effected him and is finding it hard to make friends in secondary school. He has a small group so he's getting there. His form tutor is lovely to and very supportive.

This is why i get so angry with schools, teachers now they have to toe the line so much they have no say over how subjects are taught. I was lucky with DS1's Y5 teacher and she just ignored the school headmaster and fought for my son. His Y6 teacher did the same. Luckily DS1's Y5 teacher is now the SenCo and his Y6 teacher is head of literacy and language within the primary school.
Luckily for ds2 he has this support structure or i don't know what would happened.

To anyone with hypermobilty or shows signs get to the GP straight away and say i want to so and so to see a physio therapist to be assessed. the ones who work with children are fantastic and so supportive. the ones who we see are so nice and supportive and actually speak to the child about how they feel rather than just asking you.

If you would like some exercises just me know i'll find the info the physio gave me. Its suitable for adults and children.

kezlou

Oh and the decision has been made no more offal in this house.
Were sick and can't make liver in any way shape or form taste nice.

I can't stand the texture, the taste nothing. Only OH ate it all, the boys and myself couldn't stomach it.

So yep thats it, we are from it!

Instead were going to try goat and mutton from the local halal shop.

kidcat

Ginny - if you are doing a weighted sensory type thing, be it a waistcoat, blanket, cushion or snake it must only be a max of 10% of his bodyweight. Weighted sensory products are very expensive to buy and can be expensive to make too as the weights are expensive to buy.
BUt grandma is right proprioception in autys is often very poor and weighted stuff can really help.
If you think he does have sensory difficulties its worth asking for an OT (Occupational Therapy) appointment they can often give loads of advice and even get grants towards specialist equipment.

If you do manage to make some weighted stuff please post some piccies - its always good to "borrow" ideas

Byatt

It's great so many children go on to do well academically through the support of their families.

Success comes in many guises but there are those of us with children who are not academically bright or even average intelligence, and the support and help we give continues without the "reward" of those elusive goals we as parents hope for our children, that is their full independence, children of their own (and thus grandchildren for us), and so we go back to the attitude of society which results in isolation from mainstream schooling to isolation within communities and always the worry of what happens when you are gone.

That is often the reality.

Softstuff

Okies, so I wake up, it's 7.45 and it's black as night because of the sheer quantity of rain. It's coming down in sheets. The field next door is filling (if that ever fills right up, we're under), the wind is incredible. And apparently we have a tornado warning. Oh eck. There's an evac centre open down the road. The library is closed :eek: Yes, that's the scary bit.

My upstairs neighbour is frankly losing it. I overheard her sweeping her balcony. We've been warned not to leave the house unless evacuating. Time to put all the meds in bags in case I think.