Awful Adoption Experience - Advice?

ariba10

In my mind the reason that most dogs finish up in a Dogs home is that the people that hand them in have ruined them.

Bought with good intent and have no idea how to train them.

They are a pack animal and one of you have to be the leader.

If it is not you it will be them.

We have an friend (an elderly widow) who has two dogs that are uncontrolable. But it is not her fault. It is the "Post man ringing the bell" "The man next door shouting at them" and the reasons are endless.

Unfortunatly some people think they are human and that you can reason with them.

We have always had a dog and hopefully always will.

poppygreen

Sorry that I'm not replying to each of you - I'm new to forums and all the replies - thank you all so much. I'll try to answer everyone in this...

I am now so conscious of the aggression in him which he misdirects if he can't get what he wants or is scared that not only am I uncomfortable but it has made me less inclined to relax when I let him near as I have to be constantly on my guard - and simultanesously he is pining for the closeness and routine he is used to in the home. He is a very, very needy and dominating dog - very used to having it 100% his way. It's not his fault bless him - he had one owner all his 9 years and that's all he knows as a loving pack and his place in it. And the worst thing is, I do love him - he can be so affectionate and loving. I'm heartbroken to think of parting with him and he is clearly very attached to me already, but I know it is the right decision - he either needs someone with the time and skills to work on his behaviour, or to be homed with a lifestyle more similar to what he is used to, and capable of avoiding the situations he finds too distressing.

The poor thing clearly thinks he is being 'told off' because my lifestyle is so vastly different to his previous owner (who sat on settee with him 24/7, no walks just a garden to run in, fed from the table etc). When I think of the pain this home's lying has caused me and him I feel angry and very sad.

To bond with him for a further two weeks seems cruel for us both, and if the home are keeping the money (which I suspect they are likely to do) I don't see why they shouldn't consider putting one of the other dogs in kennels with that money to make room for him. They clearly didn't spend it on the vaccs they told me they had done so I do feel well and truly aggrieved that they haven't considered this. They do sometimes utilise kennels, so I don't think that would be unreasonable in this situation.

Putting a lot of work in to amend problematic behaviour and provide training I was prepared for - but I knew my limitations, what I could offer, and my own life and stuck to it. The terrible thing is that he is a wonderful dog in most ways and I'm sure he could be happy with someone.

The biggest problem is that my life revolves around walking, camping, being outdoors etc - lots of it. And he likes walks - never had them in his life and he loves them. But what he doesn't like that he also never experienced is other people and dogs. It's not just barking, or snarling, or even snapping. Every meeting, well every time he even spots a person or dog at a long distance, is a 20 minute nightmare where he ends up hurting himself he is so uncontrollable. And its not just outside. I can't open the front door (well, I bought a dog door guard so I can now), but he will literally foam at the mouth, bite me when I open it again and attack anything I have in my hands (post, shopping) - even if I hide it out of reach and sight for hours he remembers it and attacks it. That post problem I think he could be trained out of realtively easily - but the rest of it... I haven't even considered having anyone round as he did actually bite one of my neighbours - when I first contacted the rescue about his behaviour she said I had to socialise him and let him meet 'nice people and dogs' - tried that. He bit the dog, and bit the person (separate, controlled meetings). Can't risk it.

I bought a muzzle as he is not safe to walk anywhere near others - we live on a popular doggy walking and school route - but he is not taking to it at all - in an extreme way. So I am walking him in the dark, and taking him in the car to isolated places in the day.

He also bites me if I ignore him for more than an hour or so - he is used to constant physical contact if he isn't out doing his business or eating - it's that simple.

This is the dog I was told needed a quiet life with plenty of walks.

With a different adopter these issues might not be so apparent as he might be more content if he had a higher level of attention and setter cuddles and a quieter home location to ease him in to socialisation.

I know these problems could potentially be solved for him - but I cannot put my life on hold and dedicate every waking minute to his rehabilitation and conversion to fit in with a life so alien to him. It's not fair on either of us The thought of returning him there knowing they may just do it again...

Sorry if I'm rambling or making little sense - two weeks of this has really affected me. I work from home and let's just say that has suffered hugely.

I think I'm just offloading now... I feel so powerless and really stunned that a 'caring' rescue centre would be so underhand. Surely it's aim is to match decent owners to dogs for happy unions - could this all be about pocketing donations they know they can simply refuse to return and hence, in some deluded way, get funds to support the home? I had a feeling the owner wasn't that great at running an operation such as this very well (very disorganised and strangely defensive)... But you know, I was took in by it being a charity. Feel so stupid, like I've let the dog down by not being savvy enough to walk away when I should have.

krlyr

May I recommend you join the Dogpages forum? There are many rescues or rescue staff on there, as well as individuals that have dealt with dogs with aggression issues like this. They may be able to advise you on where to go next, from management (even if it's just short-term) to other rescues or individuals who may be able to take the dog on (and do a better job of rehabilitating or placing him with an owner better than the rescue he came from)
http://www.dogpages.org.uk/forums

Also this video on aclimatising a dog to a muzzle may be worth a watch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FABgZTFvHo

poppygreen

Just want to say thank you all so much - it is a relief to be talking about it and getting all the different suggestions and support. Taking him out now for a long walk somewhere others are not. I'll check back in when I return - I'll probably be thinking a bit straighter then!

krlyr

Also if you can afford it, it may be worth some thorough investigating at the vet for a possible cause for his aggression. Pain can really change a dog's behaviour and there are medical conditions that can cause aggression as a symptom - for example, hypothyroidism. I know of a recent case where someone took in quite an aggressive little dog and despite him improving a lot with her behavioural techniques, once she got him settled enough to manage a vet trip, x-rays showed that a couple of discs in his spine had basically completely disintegrated. He must have been in a severe amount of incurable pain (he was on pain relief as she suspected something was up due to a wonky hip) that could have been the main cause of all his aggression, but hiding it well as animals do to survive.
http://www.petplace.com/dogs/medical-causes-of-aggression-in-dogs/page1.aspx
Neurological issues like epilepsy or even a brain tumour could be something to consider too.
I can understand that it is quite a financial burden for a dog that you feel missold but it may put your mind at rest to know whether there is a treatable condition or whether he may have something incurable making euthanasia the kindest option - if it's the latter then it may be fairer to get to the route of it, spoil him for a day and let him go peacefully rather than be passd pillar to post by this unscrupulous rescue.

coinxoperated

I read your post this morning and felt so extremely sad for you. I've taken my first opportunity to get on a proper PC to post.

Firstly, do you have young children in your home? Or grandchildren that visit very regularly? If so, I think having a dog that can snap at any point until he's trained/calmed is far to dangerous. With Adults its different in my opinion.

Secondly, growing up, we had a rescue GSD that used to lunge, snarl, bark etc at people/bikes/dogs/cats/air...

It took a LOT of dedication and training to help him become a 'safe' dog and I'll be honest, it wasn't an overly enjoyable experience. There were times where he would be so extremely vicious, he would turn on us if we were at the other end of the lead. We took him to a large dog training club and just made the situation worse.

We eventually got in contact with a few other people that owned very calm well mannered dogs, that agreed, with a box muzzle, we could allow him to socalize with them in a controlled environment... and it worked. We were always extremely careful with him as the amount of the damage he could do was extreme. I will never forget him grabbing my dads arm while we were out on a walk and refusing to let go! My dad had to have about 25 stitches!

He was classed as 'some minor food aggression/possessive tendancies' when we got him from a dog rescue. They also couldn't of given a monkey's when we called up to discuss the issues. He was our first dog and we did some things not quite right, but we got there in the end (sort of, he still couldn't sit in a room with a raw hide chew without trying to kill someone!)

I think if I was in your shoes, I would consider the following points.

1. Do you really have the time, commitment and dedication this dog will need to bring him up to a point that you feel he is safe? This will mean continual training, classes, maybe the cost of a behaviorist?

2. Is he of a size that you can control him in a safe way and ensure he does not cause harm to another dog / human (I.E Halti & Muzzle while out)

3. Do you feel you can learn quickly? Because dog training is not really about the dog at all! It's about how you treat them and how to communicate to a dog what you want them to do. If you really dislike the dog and aren't sure you want to commit, you'll have a problem in really throwing yourself into the training and building the relationship with the dog.

I think if you don't feel you can manage this dog, he does need to go back to a rescue. As horrid as it sounds, he'll be worse off if he bites a child / stranger and has to be put down. I would write a strongly worded complaint to the rescue, stating what danger they have actually put you and the rest of the public in by releasing this dog and not giving you the entire information and I would suggest that they make others aware of a dogs personality before taking someones money. Rescues are seen as these humble lovely little places that take dogs in when awful owners can't handle their pets.

Some might be, but many are not! I've never liked the word 'rescue', its more 'pot luck exchange'. I don't fully believe many rescues really care about the animals they have and in truth, putting a vicious or dangerous dog down is actually a good way to progress with the amount of dogs we have in pot luck exchange programmes at the moment. The whole ' we don't put a healthy dog down ' motto is great, unless the dog is mentally unwell. They don't do enough 'testing' of a dog and without checking everything, they just can't be sure. I wouldn't take on a rescue. A dog is for life, and I plan on having kids in the next 10 years - what happens when good 'ol Fido hates children?

I have my 3yr old jack russell cross and I know he has been 'moulded' into a child friendly dog. I'm 100% confident he would never go for a child, or another animal / human.

I really do sympathise with your situation, but for the sake of your sanity and the dog, work out the commitment you will need to rectify the problems, and if you don't have that commitment, look at returning him to another rescue.

Good luck xxx

topsales

I think you really need to 'name and shame' the rescue kennels. It is unfair to both you and the dog that you have both been put into this situation. Please don't let it put you off having another dog in the future...

Dollardog

themull1 wrote: »

If that rescue won't take it, try another one or take it to the RSPCA, i certainly wouldnt be keeping a dangerous dog in my house, just because one rescue centre said it couldn't take it back.

Please, if necessary find another rescue to send it to, look at the forum Krlyr directed you to with rescue people on it but please don't send it to the RSPCA, they will no doubt put it to sleep as soon as you have left which would be a shame if someone with more time and experience could turn it around.

Bromley86

they will no doubt put it to sleep

Not necessarily the worst idea in the world though. This is a 9 year old with severe behavioural problems and a danger to boot.

moggymutt

I cant quote from krylyr because my computer is old and decrepit, but the last 2 posts from krylyr read a lot of sense, possibly none of the doggy people on here that have answered so far, are dog experts to the standard that you need help from, or medical experts.

I've known of dogs aggressive because of brain tumours, sadly it happens.

If you can get a dog trainer, there's still the difficulty of not knowing which ones are realistic, and dont give opinions based on sentamentality and not safety.

My old dog was aggressive (previously used as guard dog in yard with kids tormenting him over the wall). I adored him, but my lifestyle was adapted totally to keeping him safe, which in my case was easy, because I lived in a very rural area, and didn't go much to public places etc- if we did, it was halti and baskerville (not mikki) muzzle. Dobe was so ridiculously protective of me though, I dont know how I would have coped if he'd snapped at me. (He was also excellent with horses, foals, calves, cats)