We’d like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum.
This is to keep it a safe and useful space for MoneySaving discussions. Threads that are – or become – political in nature may be removed in line with the Forum’s rules. Thank you for your understanding.
PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING: Hello Forumites! In order to help keep the Forum a useful, safe and friendly place for our users, discussions around non-MoneySaving matters are not permitted per the Forum rules. While we understand that mentioning house prices may sometimes be relevant to a user's specific MoneySaving situation, we ask that you please avoid veering into broad, general debates about the market, the economy and politics, as these can unfortunately lead to abusive or hateful behaviour. Threads that are found to have derailed into wider discussions may be removed. Users who repeatedly disregard this may have their Forum account banned. Please also avoid posting personally identifiable information, including links to your own online property listing which may reveal your address. Thank you for your understanding.
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!
Opinions please? (BTL / HUtH Wanabee!)
Teresa_Green
Posts: 141 Forumite
Hello to all on MSE Property Forums. 
(My first New Post, please be gentle!).
I am looking for opinions / advice from those more experienced / knowledgeable in this area on current situation of Boyfriend who wants to get into BTL / Property Renovation. I have advised caution due to current market / economy and personal circumstances on many occasions, however he is insisting he wants to go ahead - I need to protect myself from potential consequences of this venture I feel.
I own my own Property and so does he (both outright). I have stayed at his house a lot over the past three years, have recently had to find new employment through changes at work (beyond my choice or control) and consequently now need to continue staying over a lot at his or face a commute costing £300 a month which is also very challenging to manage time wise on top of a very demanding job. (My house is 40 - 50 miles away).
He has found a house to buy at a "bargain price" and then intends to do a full renovation on top of continuing to work a 70 hour plus week (physical outdoor job). To fund this he is also then going to remortgage his own house to fund the renovation, which will then need to be rented out to cover the cost. The house is a three bed semi and has not been touched for approx 40 years but is a good size and in a good location. He cannot do the work himself other than preparation work - he previously renovated his current Terraced House with help of Friends and his Dad a few years ago who is now 64 years of age. He has a Builder friend who says he can help with new project.
Where are we going to live? I asked. He says he could live in the house being renovated or at his Parents' house. I do not feel either of these are going to be viable options for me and also stay in my own employment realistically. I have told him this and the whole situation is now putting a great strain on our "relationship" which is rapidly deteriorating. He is very angry about this and also thinks I should be paying towards his venture. I suggested that we could get a rented property between us short term but he "can't afford" to do that apparently and it would "waste money". He has also refused to buy a house between us to live in as that would also be "a waste of money" apparently and there are "no houses" he would be willing to consider as they are all "overpriced". He insists he can make enough money in this if he does enough projects to give up his day job and be rich.
He is asking for my support to go to Mortgage Application meeting with the Bank and also Estate Agents to formally make offer (they are insisting this is done) as he fully admits he is not good with paperwork. I have arranged these for him as requested, however am feeling more and more apprehensive. I have read a bit about all this and understand there are risks and legal obligations on Landlords.
I am due to return to work next week, there are major changes now happening there as well and want to look after myself so that I don't end up ill or bankrupt too in the process!!
All sensible opinions / advice welcome, Thank you for reading.
(My first New Post, please be gentle!).
I am looking for opinions / advice from those more experienced / knowledgeable in this area on current situation of Boyfriend who wants to get into BTL / Property Renovation. I have advised caution due to current market / economy and personal circumstances on many occasions, however he is insisting he wants to go ahead - I need to protect myself from potential consequences of this venture I feel.
I own my own Property and so does he (both outright). I have stayed at his house a lot over the past three years, have recently had to find new employment through changes at work (beyond my choice or control) and consequently now need to continue staying over a lot at his or face a commute costing £300 a month which is also very challenging to manage time wise on top of a very demanding job. (My house is 40 - 50 miles away).
He has found a house to buy at a "bargain price" and then intends to do a full renovation on top of continuing to work a 70 hour plus week (physical outdoor job). To fund this he is also then going to remortgage his own house to fund the renovation, which will then need to be rented out to cover the cost. The house is a three bed semi and has not been touched for approx 40 years but is a good size and in a good location. He cannot do the work himself other than preparation work - he previously renovated his current Terraced House with help of Friends and his Dad a few years ago who is now 64 years of age. He has a Builder friend who says he can help with new project.
Where are we going to live? I asked. He says he could live in the house being renovated or at his Parents' house. I do not feel either of these are going to be viable options for me and also stay in my own employment realistically. I have told him this and the whole situation is now putting a great strain on our "relationship" which is rapidly deteriorating. He is very angry about this and also thinks I should be paying towards his venture. I suggested that we could get a rented property between us short term but he "can't afford" to do that apparently and it would "waste money". He has also refused to buy a house between us to live in as that would also be "a waste of money" apparently and there are "no houses" he would be willing to consider as they are all "overpriced". He insists he can make enough money in this if he does enough projects to give up his day job and be rich.
He is asking for my support to go to Mortgage Application meeting with the Bank and also Estate Agents to formally make offer (they are insisting this is done) as he fully admits he is not good with paperwork. I have arranged these for him as requested, however am feeling more and more apprehensive. I have read a bit about all this and understand there are risks and legal obligations on Landlords.
I am due to return to work next week, there are major changes now happening there as well and want to look after myself so that I don't end up ill or bankrupt too in the process!!
All sensible opinions / advice welcome, Thank you for reading.
0
Comments
-
If you are not party to the purchase, or the mortgage, there are no financial implications for you.
The obvious issue appears to be physical, that you won't be able to stay at his place to save your commuting costs.
Why not let your property and rent somewhere closer to work yourself? It seems you need to exercise a little independence if you want to "let him get on with it" so to speak...I am a mortgage broker. You should note that this site doesn't check my status as a Mortgage Adviser, so you need to take my word for it. This signature is here as I follow MSE's Mortgage Adviser Code of Conduct. Any posts on here are for information and discussion purposes only and shouldn't be seen as financial advice. Please do not send PMs asking for one-to-one-advice, or representation.0 -
kingstreet wrote: »If you are not party to the purchase, or the mortgage, there are no financial implications for you.
The obvious issue appears to be physical, that you won't be able to stay at his place to save your commuting costs.
Why not let your property and rent somewhere closer to work yourself? It seems you need to exercise a little independence if you want to "let him get on with it" so to speak...
Thanks Kingstreet,
I am unable to let my property as it has a local occupancy clause. I plan to sell once I have a viable alternative accomodation organised.
Renting myself is an option I am currently exploring, this would cost more than the petrol bill but be easier on myself.
It is very hard to stay out of it and let him get on with it as I have found - he is asking me to arrange appointments and attend with him, constantly contacting me and involving me. Also asking me to contribute financially even though he "does not want your money".
I can see this being the end of the relationship to be honest.
0 -
He sounds like a nob.0
-
DannyboyMidlands wrote: »He sounds like a nob.
Funnily enough, I have called him exactly that
.
:rotfl:0 -
Sounds like you've already decided the relationship is at an end and resent him asking to help with things he finds difficult. No point in hanging around and trying to prevent him pursuing his dream.
I wonder if the only reason you are sticking together is because of the location for your work.0 -
Sounds like you've already decided the relationship is at an end and resent him asking to help with things he finds difficult. No point in hanging around and trying to prevent him pursuing his dream.
I wonder if the only reason you are sticking together is because of the location for your work.
Thanks for your opinion.
In my book at least, a relationship is an agreement between two people to support each others needs.
I do see it that I am continuing to support him at the moment which is difficult as I am also having to support myself (have not been staying at his for several months now as this situation is coming to a head) and the question is about how far this is reasonable?
If he continues down this path, staying at his for work in the near future won't be an option anyway. So does this mean ending the relationship if he won't also consider my needs whilst continuing to demand support?0 -
Forgot to add - I am not stopping him but seems he needs my help to do it anyway?0
-
You resent giving him help and he won't live in a place which you can share.
I'm not judging you but just from reading your post....
It's up to you whether you want to support him financially but what he does shouldn't affect you unless you do something jointly. He might want to form a company to own the property (and maybe another for the rental) if he wants to continue doing this full time - then the company would be liable rather than him or you.0 -
You resent giving him help and he won't live in a place which you can share.
I'm not judging you but just from reading your post....
It's up to you whether you want to support him financially but what he does shouldn't affect you unless you do something jointly. He might want to form a company to own the property (and maybe another for the rental) if he wants to continue doing this full time - then the company would be liable rather than him or you.
OK, but it is meant to be a relationship?
He is dictating what he wants (my help with planning and paperwork, continue with the relationship) and simultaneously ignoring my needs / withdrawing support that he previously offered?
Used and Abused - Equality anyone?
0 -
Hi, can I make some suggestions?
1. You need to decide whether you wish to stay in a relationship with him. If not, then you can ignore the rest of this. If you do, then you need to support him in this venture in every way you can, except possibly financially.
2. You have already told him what your concerns are, now is the time to stop telling him that and to support the decision he has made. Otherwise, you are just undermining him, tearing him in multiple directions.
3. Financially, I think you should pay towards the accommodation you are receiving from him. So, he is saving you a £300 commute, and you should contribute that to his 'fighting fund'.
4. He needs to understand that you are not prepared to move in with his parents or to live on a building site. But you need to understand that he is not prepared to pay for somewhere else just to save you this commute. His budget for this project is obviously very tight, so he is right not to want any extra expenditure.
5. Can you see any compromise? If you do split up, where will you live? Will you commute?
6. Above all, try to support him, even if you are not sure that it's a good idea.No reliance should be placed on the above! Absolutely none, do you hear?0
This discussion has been closed.
Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply
Categories
- All Categories
- 352.3K Banking & Borrowing
- 253.6K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
- 454.3K Spending & Discounts
- 245.3K Work, Benefits & Business
- 601.1K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
- 177.6K Life & Family
- 259.2K Travel & Transport
- 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
- 16K Discuss & Feedback
- 37.7K Read-Only Boards