Mixed sex children sharing rooms

Carmina_Piranha_3

here the 3 bed houses are mostly occupied by a single pensioner (or pair of pensioners) who has lived in the house for many years and doesn't see any reason to move out. my parents have a 3 bed council house and intend to stay in it until they die.

assuming that the OP isn't in a council house, but it's true that people share bedrooms right up to moving out, even in council houses. there isn't a 'law'.

looby75

Carmina_Piranha wrote: »

here the 3 bed houses are mostly occupied by a single pensioner (or pair of pensioners) who has lived in the house for many years and doesn't see any reason to move out. my parents have a 3 bed council house and intend to stay in it until they die.

assuming that the OP isn't in a council house, but it's true that people share bedrooms right up to moving out, even in council houses. there isn't a 'law'.

There was total outrage here a few years ago. As supposed village "redevelopment" (i.e. knocking council houses down and selling the land to a private building contractors) some people had to rehoused. Some of those people were pensioners in 2 bed, prefab houses. Some of those pensioners insisted they needed to be rehoused in 3 bed brick houses, and were given those houses. Which were promptly bought by the pensioners children :mad: :mad: :mad:

Curious_George_2

I shared a bedroom with my sister (older than me by 8 years)
i didnt mind it, but she hated it... probably because i was fascinated by all her stuff so when she would leave the room for any period she would come back and find it..umm... 'rifled'
i dont remember actually snooping through her stuff (defintely not in a malicious way).... but it did happen,
the only thing i recall is finding a tampon and drawing mouse ears, some eyes and a nose on it

Curious_George_2

cooperbob wrote: »

My situation is my 16yo son 5yo son 8 yo daughter and ex wife all sleep in the same room.
I sleep in a double room on my todd and my 18 yo son sleeps on his own in another room .
does anyone feel like me its REALLY not a good thing?

seems like you need a shake up! if that was me i probably try this...
18yo and 16yo in one room
you and your 5yo son in the next room and
your ex and your 8yo daughter in the other
still not perfect, but gives everyone a bit more space,

cooperbob wrote: »

Have you ever tried to tell 18 and 16 year old boys they have to sleep somewhere else? !!

no, but they are still your children and at some point the "my house my rules" routine might have to kick in.... how about... you sleep in the rooms your given, or you find your own place with all the room you would like?
(i bet they shift rooms then! lol)
if your teen gives you any hassle threaten to tell his mates he still shares a room with his mummy. lol

tazz233

I shared with my brother until I was 16 and he was 9. We did have separate rooms but my brother used to prefer sleeping in my room on the spare bed. I didn't mind, he had his stuff in another room and we used to talk about our days etc. We are still really close as brother and sister and i think this is because we used to share a room.

Savvy_Sue

It depends on the temperament of the children how long you can get away with it. I've only got boys, but I knew our eldest would hate sharing with his brothers, so he's had his own room from quite a young age. The younger two could cope with it better, although when we had a French exchange student a few years ago DS2 had to go into 'spare' room and he's never moved back in with his brother! :rotfl: Except when visitors come, of course.

sarahlouise210

cooperbob wrote: »

My situation is my 16yo son 5yo son 8 yo daughter and ex wife all sleep in the same room.
I sleep in a double room on my todd and my 18 yo son sleeps on his own in another room .
does anyone feel like me its REALLY not a good thing?

As you are divorced would it not be an option for you to move out - this would mean that the 18 and 16 year old could share a room , 5 year old and 8 year old share.. and your ex wife has a room to herself ?? Maybe the eldest son may like to come with you - this would give him some more space and independance and he could help with bills ??? It must be a strain being divorced and still living together.

chardonnay_2

to be honest, i think they are still too young for this to be an issue. i would suggest puberty is the age to aim for, unless they suddenly start fighting like cats and dogs or demand some privacy.

if you like your house and the area, i would start saving for a loft conversion / granny flat conversion etc. these can cost approx 10k (perhaps less if you or family can do some/all of the work). the 10k saved over the years might be cheaper than the cost of moving, plus by the time it becomes necessary, your property will most likely have risen in value and you might be able to equity release / remortgage.

temporary / cheaper solutions are;

my friend's mum and dad had the same problem although their eldest was a girl. they shared a normal sized room until puberty then they split the rooms into two using stud walls. luckily the room had two windows and each child got a room with a window. the result was two box rooms with a corridor between, so they both had privacy.

we bought a house where the loft had been converted into a playroom. (it had not been done properly (officially) and therefore could not be sold as extra bedrooms). the only work they did was to box it in, floor it and carpet it. they then halved it, painted it bright colours and built a door with a small window hatch. their eldest son slept in this room (he loved it and must have used the hatch to check who was at his door:rotfl: ) the other half was a playroom used by all.

converting your loft this way would be a cheaper option

Spendless

cooperbob wrote: »

Have you ever tried to tell 18 and 16 year old boys they have to sleep somewhere else? !!
Especially when your ex wont back you up?
The biggest room is where the most are sleeping and yes there is a mathematical way of sorting things but its just not happening

I've tried telling a 7 yo he has to move bedrooms cos he doesn't need the bigger space.:p

The 16yo is already sharing, with his mum and younger siblings. I'd have thought sharing with his 18yo brother would be preferable. And if it's the 18yo causing problems you do have a solution that is not currently open to me......getting their own place instead.;)

cooperbob

Hmmm so its me thats being selfish then?
we have our 20 yo daughter staying also atm so the 16yo is now sleeping downstairs so she can sleep in the mainly female bedroom.
We, my ex and I are still parents it seems that its only me who sees theres a problem that needs fixing, but why should the solution be me moving out? Ive paid for the house...Im tired of !!!!!ing about how she's such a selfish cow.

we have court next month then we'll see how things pan out