Exchanged. Wake up crying most days. Advice pls.

Silvelady1955

In a stupid moment besieged by indecision and pressure I exchanged on my house. It was categorically the biggest mistake of my life. I think my depression has led me recently not to act sanely is the only thing I can say.


I want out. Out of the contract. I haven't bought so want to hand them back their money pay their expenses and ....well, is it possible.....? I need some help please in sorting out this mess.

I know i could be sued. Is that likely ... My solicitor says yes, and they would win. But then she is wanting the deal to go through isn't she...

pmlindyloo

The short answer is yes, you could be sued.

More to the point, if I were your buyer I would be blooming annoyed to put it mildly.


You are putting your buyers and possibly others in a terrible situation.


Is it really such a dreadful situation to have sold?


You mention you were under pressure to sell. Without meaning to pry do you want to tell us what has happened and why you now think you've made such a dreadful mistake? Perhaps we can help.

Yorkie1

I'm sorry to hear about your predicament and how you're feeling.

Unfortunately your solicitor is right. They are not just spinning you a line to get the deal to go through.

It will be hugely stressful and costly for you to fail to complete now that you have exchanged.

Edited to reduce text to:
- can your GP offer short term assistance above what medication you're currently taking?
- can anyone support you through this; family etc?
- tell yourself that you can always sell or let it out if need be.

Better_Days

There is a long thread on here where this has happened. It is probably worth a read through so that you can get a good idea of what is involved.
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/1806123

As someone whose illness periodically affects cognitive function and decision making I have some understanding how this could happen.

Nonetheless, as you will see from the above thread failing to complete is something that should not be done without a great deal of thought and expert advice. And of course your poor buyers will be seriously impacted if you go down this route. Nightmare all round.

And another thread here
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/18606499#Comment_18606499

harrup

Oh, my.... that is a predicament.

Whilst you truly have my full empathy - I can only fathom what it must feel like to sell ones home only to relise it was the mother of all mistakes - please do NOT disregard your solicitor's advice. The buyers can sue you as you are in breach of contract.

Would you care to expand WHY you now feel so bad ?

Even if we can't directly help, sometimes explaining a situation to others helps to bring order to one's own thoughts and feelings.

Silvelady1955

THANKYOU. All of you. For such kindness. They are first time buyers staying with parents. My partner decided it was not right to move on the day of exchange. He hadn't made it clear he didn't want me living in his part of the world. Or maybe i didnt listen.I succumbed to pressure from phone calls. I know realise I was not thinking clearly. My house and job provides me with such security I don't know how I can have been so blind to my happiness here. I have asked to speak with an independent solicitor on Monday but one thing is for sure I could. It bear a court case. I was thinking of offering them 10k and their deposit back if they would sign a non sue letter or some such.
I am now going to re read your lovely responses. THANKYOU.

Mobeer

It's probably possible, but would cost an awfull lot of money.

Your buyers would have a whole lot of costs incurred that they could claim off you (solicitor, mortgage, searches, moving costs etc), plus costs not yet incurred (like renting for a indefinte period until they find somewhere else), plus emotional hardship, plus..

Then your solicitor would want paying, plus your estate agent and probably others..

Plus all the legal costs involved in court cases..



You could potentially try to negotiate a mutual termination of the contract, but this would still involve paying huge sums to the other party, plus paying your solicitor for work so far and a lot more, plus paying the estate agent and maybe others.


In short, find somewhere to rent for a while and look to the future not the past.

pmlindyloo

Silvelady1955 wrote: »

THANKYOU. All of you. For such kindness. They are first time buyers staying with parents. My partner decided it was not right to move on the day of exchange. He hadn't made it clear he didn't want me living in his part of the world. Or maybe i didnt listen.I succumbed to pressure from phone calls. I know realise I was not thinking clearly. My house and job provides me with such security I don't know how I can have been so blind to my happiness here. I have asked to speak with an independent solicitor on Monday but one thing is for sure I could. It bear a court case. I was thinking of offering them 10k and their deposit back if they would sign a non sue letter or some such.
I am now going to re read your lovely responses. THANKYOU.

You poor thing!


All is not lost.


If you have the money to cover the costs then you can investigate it. Get some idea of what it would cost you to pull out now and see if you can afford it.


If you can't afford it or it will put you in debt then ask for a longer time before completion and start looking for a rental property where you can take your time deciding what you want to do in the future.


And remember, a house is just bricks and mortar. Wherever you live you are the one that makes it a home.

Joannag_2

I think rent. Look forward and be positive. Good luck.

GDB2222

Silvelady1955 wrote: »

THANKYOU. All of you. For such kindness. They are first time buyers staying with parents. My partner decided it was not right to move on the day of exchange. He hadn't made it clear he didn't want me living in his part of the world. Or maybe i didnt listen.I succumbed to pressure from phone calls. I know realise I was not thinking clearly. My house and job provides me with such security I don't know how I can have been so blind to my happiness here. I have asked to speak with an independent solicitor on Monday but one thing is for sure I could. It bear a court case. I was thinking of offering them 10k and their deposit back if they would sign a non sue letter or some such.
I am now going to re read your lovely responses. THANKYOU.

1. I don't think that you need a second solicitor, but you do need someone to help you negotiate with your buyers. Are you quite sure that your present solicitor can't help you? I'd start much lower than £10k as a sweetener, eg £2.5k, then work up from there.

2. You may also be liable for estate agent's fees, even if your buyers agree to abort the purchase.

3. You sound in a terrible emotional state, dear. Is there anyone you can talk to about this? You have the weekend coming up, so try to calm down. Go out for a walk in the sunshine. It will help you get things in perspective. The very, very worst that can happen is that you proceed with the sale and then have to rent for 6 months whilst you buy another house. You CAN survive doing that, even if it is a bit of a calamity.

DVardysShadow

Silvelady1955 wrote: »

My house and job provides me with such security I don't know how I can have been so blind to my happiness here. I have asked to speak with an independent solicitor on Monday but one thing is for sure I could. It bear a court case. I was thinking of offering them 10k and their deposit back if they would sign a non sue letter or some such.
I am now going to re read your lovely responses. THANKYOU.

OK, this thread has sort of covered the fact that there are 2 ways you could go about this

• you could simply refuse to fulfil the contract
• you could negotiate a mutually agreed termination of the contract without completion

Whatever you do, don't refuse to fulfil the contract. But you must accept that your buyers may not wish to let you off the contract.

I don't see that you need an independent solicitor - you need to take advice from your conveyancing solicitor on what you must negotiate to terminating the contract, negotiate a termination and then instruct your solicitor to to deal with the termination on the terms you have agreed. Your solicitor will confirm the terms of the termination with the buyers' solicitor and send any agreed monies. The buyer's solicitor can then return papers. Confirmation that papers have been returned in accordance with the mutually agreed termination of the contract will be adequate proof.

When it comes to negotiating the termination, I suggest that you do not use your solicitor or any solicitor to negotiate. Solicitors are fine for implementing agreements but poor at negotiating them. I suggest you reassure your agent as to his fee and arrange to meet the buyers at the agents office.

I suggest an opening offer of £5000 plus buyers' costs. £10,000 is too high for an opening offer, but you may need to go that far if you are determined.