Apparently lost DLA appeal - help?

Pollycat

Thanks for the update, Emma.

TBH, it sounds very much like our experience with AA claim.

Reading back through your first post, I hope you yourself are feeling less stressed that when you first posted and I hope your Mum is getting help for her problems.

As for you two:

zoominatorone wrote: »

I wouldn't take it as good news, it's going to be more money for spending on the drink.:(

welshmoneylover wrote: »

I expect the champers is being drunk following the wonderful news.

you should be ashamed of yourselves for those comments.

You clearly didn't bother to read the OP's first post in which she details all her Mum's problems.

emma18x wrote: »

Before going into the appeal situation, I would first like to explain a little about my mothers illnesses and disabilities.
She is mentally unwell and suffers from deep depression and anxiety. She has learning disabilities and an undiagnosed mental illness which gives her child like behaviour and violent outbursts. She is epileptic and constantly suffers from dizzy spells and blackouts. She suffers from pain in her legs (particularly ankles), which greatly affects her walking ability (she is unable to walk more than a few steps without assistance). And lastly but probably worst of all, she is a long term alcoholic (please don't judge her on this). She turned to alcohol when her mother died and unfortunately it took a hold of her. The alcoholism is so bad that, she can have, and has had fits if she doesn't have a drink first thing in the morning.

Did you?

No, you just jumped in with sarcastic, nasty comments.

If you can't post anything constructive or supportive, I suggest you find a different board to post on.

zoominatorone

Pollycat wrote: »

Thanks for the update, Emma.

TBH, it sounds very much like our experience with AA claim.

Reading back through your first post, I hope you yourself are feeling less stressed that when you first posted and I hope your Mum is getting help for her problems.

As for you two:





you should be ashamed of yourselves for those comments.

You clearly didn't bother to read the OP's first post in which she details all her Mum's problems.



Did you?

No, you just jumped in with sarcastic, nasty comments.

If you can't post anything constructive or supportive, I suggest you find a different board to post on.

The op's mother seems to have terrible trouble getting herself around. Who goes to the shop and supplies the alcohol that needs to be drunk daily?

Who is the enabler?


And just ofr your information, I know full well what is it like to be living in a house with a selfish alchoholic who thinks the entire universe revolves around them.................but don't forget, nobody forces alchohol down anyone's neck

Pollycat

Pollycat wrote: »

If you can't post anything constructive or supportive, I suggest you find a different board to post on.

Can you read?

Pollycat

zoominatorone wrote: »

The op's mother seems to have terrible trouble getting herself around. Who goes to the shop and supplies the alcohol that needs to be drunk daily?

Who is the enabler?

Maybe it is the OP who is the 'enabler' but she did mention this below some months ago - which you obviously failed to read as you just jumped in with a put-down comment.

emma18x wrote: »

This is now something that really worries me and I wouldn't dare try to stop her from drinking without some sort of medical support as I'd be worried of the consquences.

zoominatorone wrote: »

And just ofr your information, I know full well what is it like to be living in a house with a selfish alchoholic who thinks the entire universe revolves around them

In that case, I would have thought you might have more empathy towards the OP but perhaps you just like being sarcastic and putting people down.

Perhaps instead of this:

zoominatorone wrote: »

I wouldn't take it as good news, it's going to be more money for spending on the drink.:(

you could have - from your own experience - given some support.

Gentile

Was it a good idea to let your mum get drunk when she had an assessment!!

And they passed her assessment too ? I guess they just didnt want the hassle and approved the thing to just close the file.

The best way forward is to get her off the drink and not continue as is.

miduck

davsidipp wrote: »

i think people fail to realise,alcoholism is an illness.!

That requires treatment ...

It is such a shame that someone chooses to update on their finances, but not the progress on their health?

zoominatorone

Pollycat wrote: »

Maybe it is the OP who is the 'enabler' but she did mention this below some months ago - which you obviously failed to read as you just jumped in with a put-down comment.




In that case, I would have thought you might have more empathy towards the OP but perhaps you just like being sarcastic and putting people down.

Perhaps instead of this:

you could have - from your own experience - given some support.

• The only support I would give is to say make sure the extra money she gets every week does not get used on drink.
• Stop enabling the mother to be an alcoholic by going out to buy the drink for her

• Think long and hard about tough love. I take it nobody is pouring the drink down the mother's throat. Therefore, she is making a choice to drink it. Taxpayers shouldn't have to be paying for that choice.

Oh and Pollycat, feel free to put me on ignore if you don't like the fact I have first hand experience of a drunken parent and the havoc it wreaks on others lives.

davsidipp

all offers of advice are good in thought,but in practice are hard to conquer,look at george best,all the help he could get,still could not control these urges.mums brother is blind,due to alcoholism,no amount of treatment has helped,so advice is good only if it works.

zoominatorone

davsidipp wrote: »

all offers of advice are good in thought,but in practice are hard to conquer,look at george best,all the help he could get,still could not control these urges.mums brother is blind,due to alcoholism,no amount of treatment has helped,so advice is good only if it works.

There comes a point in life where people have to accept that THEY are responsible for it, not the family, or the taxpayers.

I'm all for giving people help, but what kind of a mess are we in now where anyone can do anything they want to themselves (also known as slowly killing themselves), and other people will go to work to pay for it.

Guy along the street died at the age of 36 because of alcoholism. Never left the house for 5 years before he died. His mother in effect, helped kill him, because she picked up his benefit money and bought the booze for him.

davsidipp

zoominatorone wrote: »

There comes a point in life where people have to accept that THEY are responsible for it, not the family, or the taxpayers.

I'm all for giving people help, but what kind of a mess are we in now where anyone can do anything they want to themselves (also known as slowly killing themselves), and other people will go to work to pay for it.

Guy along the street died at the age of 36 because of alcoholism. Never left the house for 5 years before he died. His mother in effect, helped kill him, because she picked up his benefit money and bought the booze for him.

that goes for a lot of illnesses,but in the meantime we have a duty to care for people,who cannot help themselves,just withdrawing their benefits won't stop them drinking.as for so called people going to work,to pay for said illneses,get down of your high horse,people in work claim benefits,not just those who cannot work.