Preparedness for when

moneyistooshorttomention

I "wish" - ie that being married or single wasn't a factor in whether I could purchase a house or no:(.

That may be the case for people in well-paid careers. For those of us who have only ever had low-paid jobs though it is absolutely the key to what sort of housing you will have (well it certainly very much was in my era).

I decided to buy my starter house in my early 20s (ie when I'd always thought I would be doing so) and would have done so very quickly and easily (even in Expensive City) with no problem AT ALL if I'd been married (even if that had been to a man with an equally low-paid job). As a single person though it just wasn't possible whatever I did and only luck got me my starter house in the end 10 years late. I could see very clearly that I could have economised to within an inch of my life and saved like billy-o, but house prices would have gone on up at a (much) faster rate than I could possibly save and I was living darn economically anyway (bedsits and eating things like faggots anyone?).

Children would never have come along anyway (as I didn't want them personally and, thankfully for me, it was the 1970s onwards that I started having relationships in), so there would always have been 2 full-time salaries coming in (bar one of us temporarily being unemployed due to redundancy).

[Deleted User]

You can't in all reality move to a new area and expect to be welcomed with open arms and have the whole place put out the bunting and greet you and yours with cries of joy and have everyone gratefully make you an instant part of their lives. Life doesn't work like that no matter who or what you are. You have to earn a place in any community, you have to become a useful and active part of everyone elses everyday lives. We are a very mixed bag in this village, lots of fairly well off older folks, lots of families with older kids and increasingly a regeneration of families moving in with younger children. We have some local authority housing with a complete cross section of society in it, we have some local authority and some privately owned flats too and a couple of over 55s establishments as well. We came, as I said on a job move never having set foot in this part of the world before and knowing absolutely no one. It was very hard. The first six or seven years were very lonely and isolated and I hated it with a passion, my only aim was to get this prison sentence over and done with and go back home and then DD2 said she wanted to read Medicine at Uni so I decided to look for a job to get her fees in the bank before she went and was lucky enough to find 3 days a week in our local chemists shop and it utterly transformed my life. I got to know everyone, right across the age spectrum many of whom are still firm friends many years later, I got to be useful to people and still 10 years later have folks say I wish you were still there, it was fun coming in to the shop when you were. I earned my own place, it wasn't given but it's been earned and has made this village HOME and I have MY place here with people who care about me as I care about them. It's doable, you just have to work at it!!!

Life IS what you make it! You can go through life feeling like a victim and always blaming circumstances or rising prices, or life circumstances for things you feel ought to happen or you can get cracking, roll your sleeves up, stop feeling sorry for yourself and just get on with it! You cannot ever stop fighting for what you want and roll over and keep saying poor me, people get very bored if you do!!!

moneyistooshorttomention

That is one thing I can agree on. I planned on working part-time when I moved here and that's exactly what I am doing (on a voluntary basis) and that's been part of how I've made a reasonable "circle of people" now. Learning Welsh was another way forward and I've made some good friends through that of people in the same position (nearly all of us have dropped out of those lessons now....but it served a purpose in that respect).

I've always "worked my way" and "paid my way" and I now have 3 separate voluntary work activities I'm doing and duly finding I'm meeting people through them and have had some positive feedback from "locals" for doing these things (even if they aren't involved themselves), as they do like seeing these things happening.

No "feeling sorry for self" here....more a determination to "make the best of things". Yep...people can feel sorry for themselves, be it for circumstances not of their making....or the background they came from. Me...I make jokes now about the (mixed) background I came from and "Don't judge the bank balance by the voice - joke...joke" (as I have a bit of a "posh" voice I'm told)...but the bank balance is eek! (if could be worse). We have whatever background we have and go on from there and I think it was quite useful personally to have a "mixed" one...as I've heard both "selfish middle class people after what they want for themselves personally" comments and "got a chip on their shoulder from never having had anything" within my own family.

[Deleted User]

The point I'm trying to make is that now we are INTEGRATED, we are part of the whole and not part of a small minority group of people in the same position as 'incomers'. It's achieveable to become part of the heart and core of a community IF you work hard enough at it and make yourself a useful member of the populace.

People can also always make excuses for their outlook of despondency on their lives and hope that others will extend sympathy to them. I am made of sterner stuff and have the attitude that you can make the best of things and smile at the world, you can put your drive and energy also into making your own personal place in your world a place you are comfortable in. It's easy to blame background, how you speak, how you look etc. for the woes in your life but it IS possible to just put that aside as an attitude and forge something durable and contented from your own efforts!

moneyistooshorttomention

Absolutely - exactly what I just said.

We may land up thanking each others posts yet:rotfl:

[Deleted User]

Theoretically all things in this life are at least possible if a little unlikely!

Frugalsod

I found some pictures of people why people should prepare.

http://www.funtasticus.com/2015/02/20/boston-snow-is-crazy/

Karmacat

Those are amazing photos!

GreyQueen

Karmacat wrote: »

Those are amazing photos!

I'll second that! My mind boggles at snow in those quantities, it really is something to see that person sledging on their roof.

Back at the homestead after spending most of the day fielding election enquiries. OK, I did other types of calls too, but those blinking elections calls are driving me nutso (nuttier than usual). Gonna be a lo-o-o-ng haul until May 7th and we've got to get through Year End first.

Beam me up, Scotty.

RAS

My concern with those photos is that roofs will start to cave in under the weight of snow.

Even more scary, people might start clearing the snow off the roofs from the gutters upwards.