Ex partner to supply babyfood when he has him?

sarahsaver_2

Hi, is it ok to make my ex partner provide baby food for when he has him once a week? I provide the milk for when he has him. he pays child maintenance. I just thought he can put a bit more effert in by sorting baby meals out instead of me having it all ready for him, which is really easy. I wouldnt be providing food when he's not on baby food would i, like packing fish fingers and sandwiches.

sarah

zzzLazyDaisy

I can tell you that when my cousin and her husband split up, he never fed their daughter when she was with him. If my cousin hadn't sent her with sandwiches and snacks, she wouldn't have had anything to eat. He used to leave her sat on her own in front of the TV and go to the pub with his mates. His main reason for having her there at all was because over night visits reduce the CSA payments.

She was 14 at the time. She soon voted with her feet and stayed at home with her mum.

My point is that you cannot 'make' him do anything, when he has the child how he cares for him is up to him. If you leave him to make the decisions about what to feed, how to prepare the food, etc, then you have to trust him to do it properly and leave him to get on with it. If you are happy that he will feed the baby properly, don't send food. If you are concerned that he might not feed him properly, continue sending the food. Is it worth risking the child not being fed enough, or the right food, for the sake of making a point?

HappyMJ

If he is reducing his CSA by 1/7th then he should (morally) be using the 1/7th to buy food for the child.

Blackpool_Saver

this is a baby and he wont do that, I would withhold contact myself

sarahsaver_2

Thanks for your comments. He only has him from 11 till half 6 once a week he would only need to feed a couple of small meals. I do believe he would feed him, he wouldnt not feed him. our sons only 5 months old.

kevin137

Ask him, and see what he says...

snuggle69

Sorry but I think this is petty, surely you want to make sure your baby is fed properly and providing your ex with the food ensures that it has that.

I am a single parent and its petty things like this that cause problems and hatred grow up and think yourself lucky that you receive maintenance!

sarahsaver_2

snuggle69 wrote: »

Sorry but I think this is petty, surely you want to make sure your baby is fed properly and providing your ex with the food ensures that it has that.

I am a single parent and its petty things like this that cause problems and hatred grow up and think yourself lucky that you receive maintenance!

I dont think its petty at all. your saying hes not capable of being responsible feeding his own child!!! both our names are on birth certificate so we "BOTH" have parental responsiblility. If I had to worry about him not feeding him right then i would worry about him having him for the day.

receiving maintenance does not mean I have to sort everything out for the father for when our sons in his care! if your letting your child go to someone that cant feed a child then you need to wise up!!!

marleyboy

It shouldn't be a problem, Baby food is not too expensive and relatively easy to prepare. If he doesn't feed baby whilst with him, Baby will soon make him regret it.

My Son lets me know only to well when he is getting hungry.

skibadee

Does he actually INSIST you provide babyfood or have you just always done it?
Might be a good idea to give him an idea of what little one actually eats though.
I have my grandaughter for the day a few times a month and mum always puts a note in for me ie., what she has and when....maybe you could do that for dad?...babies tend to change their eating habits/routines quite regularly.
Too be honest for the amount of time little one is there, I can't see the problem at the mo' for you to put in what you know little one will eat....probably only one maybe two small meals anyway?

mspa

I thought to get a reduction in csa you had to have overnight contact