make do and mend for tougher times

kidcat

Fuddle - my youngest plays out in the front with her friends, we dont have a gate or fence so they play on the grass at front or they are in and out of each others houses. If she was out alone I would have someone outside watching like a hawk but as they are a group (usually six or more) I just keep popping to check. I wouldnt lock the gate personally as that will stop genuine people - however I would make the gate noisy, a loud windchime attached should work. That way you will hear anyone coming in and can check.

Possession - I think it was you who was worried about their year six and big school, I had exactly this and was panicking when my eldest went as I had kept her way too restricted and was suddenly faced with issues. I was aware of this when DS14 was getting older and planned earlier to start the whole letting go thing.

With kids its all about balance, giving them enough freedom to enable them to grow whilst maintaining enough restrictions to keep them safe - parenting is the hardest job I have ever done bar none,.

kidcat

Thanks D&DD and stiltwalker I will definitely be looking into these things.

shegar

Dont forget Channel 4 at 8 tonight The Superscrimpers are on for an hour..........:D

fuddle

shegar wrote: »

Dont forget Channel 4 at 8 tonight The Superscrimpers are on for an hour..........:D

Ah, nearly did. Thank you

Not necessarily that it was a chugger, I would have felt the same about any stranger chancing their arm entering my property. I see what you're saying though, had someone dropped off a parcel I maybe wouldn't have been so cross.

Basically, I'm not going to let them out there again. It is too much of a risk.

Thanks for your feedback

Possession

kidcat wrote: »

Possession - I think it was you who was worried about their year six and big school, I had exactly this and was panicking when my eldest went as I had kept her way too restricted and was suddenly faced with issues. I was aware of this when DS14 was getting older and planned earlier to start the whole letting go thing.

With kids its all about balance, giving them enough freedom to enable them to grow whilst maintaining enough restrictions to keep them safe - parenting is the hardest job I have ever done bar none,.

washing machines and concrete don't sound a good mix! Hope it can be replaced in as stress-free (and cheap) way as possible.
I do need to start 'training' DS for independence more. It petrifies me I admit, because i know full well when he is with us he doesn't look properly when he crosses the road, he often walks on the kerb...no matter how many times he is told. This is not the kind of thing you can just let them learn the perils of by themselves. Sigh.

katieowl_2

kidcat wrote: »

katie - only just read your post, am really sorry have no ideas for your friend, but with regards to car insurance, some companies will accept claim free named driver status and allow some NCD, they usually require a letter from the insurer saying that they have been a named driver and had no accidents. Its worth asking a few if he has been claim free as a named driver.
I suppose with regards to your friend it seems to me she would be better off with the house sold, obviously its better if she sells it herself rather than have it repossessed but if she is going bankrupt anyways it wont make much difference. At least the worry over the house would be gone and it may help her mental health

The money worry might be gone, but I think a lot of her 'issues' will be worse because of not having a safe place to call her own and also I'm seriously worried that her giving up the dog who is her OH/BF/Child substitue/reason to get out of bed will push her over the edge

Yeah we did look for named driver stuff cos' he was insured for a bit with me, but the one we went with was cheaper, and it didn't make any difference. Honestly, I don't know how this generation of 20-30 year olds are going to make any kind of life for themselves.

Kate

kidcat

katie - tell me about it, I will be adding DD to our little car insurance in a few weeks (well when she can finish her licence form!) and it will addd £1000 to our insurance and that is the oldest cheapest car you can insure!

GreyQueen

mardatha wrote: »

Kidcat I just got a Hotpoint Aqualtis and its great. Takes 9kg load.
Re savings, best way there is to keep it in the house - not under the mattress but in a fireproof/waterproof safe under the floorboards or in the garden. What TPTB don't see their wee black hearts won't grieve. I would always have a good cash float handy and it's nobody business but mine.

OK Mar, I won't sleep unless you tell me; what does TPTB mean?

Pops, £6,000 is "fully disregarded" for the purposes of means-tested benefits like Income Support, HB and CTB. From £6,000.01 to £16,000 they will have to assume that for every £250 (or part thereof), you're getting £1 a week in interest and will deduct that off you entitlement. So £7k would cost you £4 a week off you entitlement to HB, £8k would cost you £8 and so on and so forth. It would be per £500 and kick in at £10,000.01 if your were a pensioner btw.

I have well under £10k a year after deductions and basically spend 7 months income paying my rent and council tax so am about £29 a week better off than on the dole. I do get a small amount of TC but it is less than I pay in income tax (oh the irony) so a sensible system would let me keep a bit more of my earnings and not waste money administering my claim. But we don't live on Planet Sensible, unfortunately.

Nonetheless, I'm grateful for small mercies. Even if the HMRC worry me half to death and are contributing to my white hairs on an hourly basis............:rotfl:

Fuddle, we have door-to-door chuggers infesting the Towers. They're mostly nitwits but young and daft tend to travel together. They certainly shouldn't have untied your gate; you might have had a chugger-eating monster hound running loose for all they knew. You were rightly livid.

Try not to beat yourself up over it; you recognise that you've had an overly-protective mother (although she was doing her best for you, I'm sure) and that you'll have issues about the boundaries you allow your girls.

I remember when I was fifteen biking 16 miles across the county and 16 miles back to see a schoolfriend who was off poorly. Her family thought it was extraordinary, my family thought it normal. She was only allowed to ride her bicycle on her own estate, I was all over the place on mine. Mind you, having been cursed with more than enough bl00dy-mindedness for several girls, I wouldn't have tolerated being told to stay close anyway.

You'll work thorugh it and it will get easier, I promise. And, viewed positively, no jury would ever convict you of shouting a chugger to death; we've all been tempted at least once.:p;)

Well, I'm chillaxing ahead of being AWOL for about a week so just wanted to give the thread a heads-up in case someone worried (well, someone might, you never know ). I cannot possibly divulge what I shall be up to, just suffice to say that Bushcraft and camping in sopping wet woods won't be involved in any way, shape, manner or form. I have learned my lesson in that respect, oh yes indeedy.

Pls type slowly for the next 7 days or I shall never catch up again...........:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

ETA, Kidkat, are either yourself or the DH from military families at all? If so SSAFA may be able to assist you.

jamanda

Kidcat - If you are a bit stuck re. the washer, I believe you can rent them - and the renter people do all the repairs etc. Might tide you over for a bit.

Hope grand goggie is settling in well. Well done for giving him a lovely home.

westcoastscot

GQ - the powers that be :-)