Refinancing to cover school fees

Dave_Ham

DVardysShadow wrote: »

I am assuming you were privately educated and Dave was State educated. Thank you for illuminating the argument.

Was Grant maintained - whatever that meant back in the day. Had to pass a test though and still the most celebrated school in my part of Essex - although maybe that is not too hard although I do take the point you were aiming at.

The issue is I actually agree with J, although may have articulated a bit softer.

The OP is clearly not an idiot, good job, nice hobbies and lifestyle and happened to mention the private school clanger which is like red rag to a bull.

Had the OP came on another sub forum and said anyone got an idea of how I can reduce my outgoings, he would be fair game.

Whilst this is an open forum and for all the right reasons anyone can have an opinion, but the request for help did not centre on this issue and therefore in my opinion nor should the resulting posts..

Just my thoughts..

Thrugelmir

AnnatarsGift wrote: »

We could cut spending in many areas as we are an active family. Gym membership costs the family £160 a month (and yes we do use it many times a week). My wife and daughter spend as much again horse riding each month. My son and I play golf and go climbing each week, yet more expense. The outgoings are considerable and we do still manage regular holidays, although the annual ski trip has been a casualty.

Not a personal comment but an observation. Life is about choices and priorities for all of us. Perhaps you need to decide which are yours. Treating a property like a credit card solves the short term issues. The real problems lie further down the road when life changes perhaps employment or health wise.

How certain can you be that £54k is enough?

AnnatarsGift

Voyager2002 wrote: »

The fact that your children were offered places at a fee-paying school says nothing about their academic achievement, the kind of education they "deserve", and so forth! A fee-paying school is a business; the round of tests and interviews is part of the marketing process; in reality they are about as likely to turn away customers with money as are Tesco. The real test is whether the school is willing to offer them free places: children with real ability are subsidised by such schools since their academic achievements help with marketing.

I'm quite aware of how a business works and the mechanics involved, including marketing. This school in question markets itself on results and gets 10 children applying for every space. I'm no millionaire and so when my son was offered a place I choose to believe it was at least partially based on academic results.

Voyager2002 wrote: »

So far as the state schools in your area are concerned: don't just be passive consumers. For a fraction of the money (and the time needed to earn that money) that you put into private education, you could make a real difference to your local school, improving things not only for your children but for the many others (like your younger selves) who have no choice but to go there.

I have been involved with schools and I have been active on PTA's. Under a government whose top 3 priorities were "Education, education, education" I fought to keep open a wonderful little primary school where I myself went as a youngster. The education policy at the time was to increase parental choice, promote parental involvement and reduce class sizes to improve the quality of education. I personally wrote to the then Education Secretary and managed to obtain a private meeting for the school PTA with her. Needless to say all the priorities of parental involvement, class sizes and improved choice were ignored in favour of cost cutting and the school was closed.

My kids then had to move to a school where all the class sizes were 30+ from a school where they were 10-15 per year group. Thankfully that school turned out to be fantastic and is one of the best in the country. The problem though is that the council are now struggling with class sizes and a growing population. Quelle surprise!

I have no problem with state schools, just the idiots in government who destroy them. I have no more time or patience to waste fighting them either, not if I can pay for a better education and avoid playing the education lottery.

And before anyone gets into it, no I don't believe state education is inferior. But it is a lottery. Private education won't make my kids smarter or guarantee better results, but it will increase their chances and they certainly come out far more confident and well mannered. They will also (unfairly) get better opportunities, such as when applying for university spots or jobs. Those same prejudices will also possibly at times work against them, but on balance I know where my preferences lie and I want the best for my kids. It's selfish I know and I won't apologise for that when it is my kids' future at stake.

Thrugelmir

AnnatarsGift wrote: »

and well mannered.

Having experienced both private and public schooling with my son. I would disagree.

Manners are equally learnt at home. Money buys entrance in private schools. New money so to speak isn't always cultured.

harvey115

Private or Public does not matter as long as you think its right for your children and you can provide the necessary costs...

Best of luck

AnnatarsGift

DVardysShadow wrote: »

I am assuming you were privately educated and Dave was State educated. Thank you for illuminating the argument.

EDIT: Doh! I thought you meant me when you said Dave. Yes I'm another Dave hiding behind an alias. I'll leave my answer even though the question wasn't I realise now aimed at me.

If it helps I took the entrance exams for the same school my kids are at, but the place terrified me and none of my friends were going there. I was painfully shy and introvert. I did however screw them over by being the only one to score 100% on the maths exam and 0% on the English exam. So they let me through to the interview stage just to find out what the deal was. Apparently I told them that I liked maths but didn't want to do well on English because I didn't want to get through.

So yes I was State educated, up until the strikes hit schools and then my sister and I were pulled out and stuck into one THOSE private schools. One where money matters more than academic ability. It was the worst year of my life and worse still for my sister, who never recovered from it in many ways.

I have cousins who went to THOSE private schools. They were quite happy there because it was all they knew. They didn't achieve academically, nor have they jobwise since. But they did come out as confident well connected individuals and as such they are comfortable and happy enough for now.

So I have seen much of the spectrum of education that is out there and if I can tell you one thing it is that it's the school that matters. Not whether it is private or state. But if you can afford it and you don't have the pleasure of a great state school then go private and choose carefully.

AnnatarsGift

Thrugelmir wrote: »

Having experienced both private and public schooling with my son. I would disagree.

Manners are equally learnt at home. Money buys entrance in private schools. New money so to speak isn't always cultured.

lol My dad would be considered new money. Not too dissimilar from Lord Sugar in many ways. I think I am safe in saying that cultured is one thing he has never been accused of.

Yes, manners are equally learnt at home as are most life skills. Unfortunately they are also learnt in school and while I am happy for my kids to experience both sides of the coin I'd like to ensure they know and appreciate the difference.

Oh lord! I'm starting to sound like a right snob. I guess if the cap fits...

AnnatarsGift

Thrugelmir wrote: »

How certain can you be that £54k is enough?

As someone who did statistics at university (and almost studied actuarial maths until I realised I would certainly die from suicide before the age of 30 if I did) I can say I am almost certainly, at the very least 0% sure that £54K is enough. If life were predictable then my actuarial friends (the ones who did survive and are now very wealthy) would be out of a job.

Thrugelmir

AnnatarsGift wrote: »

Oh lord! I'm starting to soound like a right snob. I guess if the cap fits...

Much depends on the child. My son left after prep school and went to state. We've never regretted the decision. As he was far happier as a child in the state system. The emphasis on academic achievement in private school didn't suit him. Likewise I had friends that had children in both systems.

The_J

DVardysShadow wrote: »

I am assuming you were privately educated and Dave was State educated. Thank you for illuminating the argument.

:rotfl: first time I've ever been accused of that! Can you not tell I'm a boarish oaf?