Partner going halves on decorating

BugglyB

For redecorating purposes I think you should just go halves and keep your fingers crossed. Protecting your assets is important but really I think this is a step too far! Are you talking like 2 grand or 30?

thecatwithnotail

Thanks for replies everyone - the PDF guide looks very helpful, so will probably go with some guidelines from that. The amount is about 5-6k between us, so it's not a trivial amount, and as OH doesn't have many assets and won't have a rental deposit moving in with me, it's an issue for him.

Person_one

Hang on a minute, he's requested the redecorating but only offered to pay for half?

If you were happy with it the way it was and its only him who wants the change I think he should up his generosity a bit, pay for the lot, and be grateful to you for letting him make major changes to your home so soon!

hazyjo

I think you should definitely charge rent. He'll still be using half the utilities, increasing your council tax, adding wear and tear to the property... why should he live rent free? Or is he paying for you to go out, all the shopping, holidays, etc...

It makes naff all difference if you have £10k left on your mortgage or £200k. He should still pay towards a roof over his head. Obviously you're not rolling in it (or surely you'd just pay for the work yourself), so put that rent money towards something nice or save for the works to be done (if YOU want them all doing now).

You cannot start adding things to the 'agreement'. What if the kettle breaks, or the washing machine, the bed(!) - I presume he'll use all of those. Some things have to just come under 'joint use' and if it dies, he contributes. Or that's what you choose to use your rent money for - so that if you do split up, you get to keep the stuff you bought (without him contributing to anything).

Jx

Mojisola

You could have a savings fund which you both pay into. If work needs to be done on the house, or items replaced, that can be paid for out of the account. Assess it regularly and if it builds up and the money isn't needed for practical things, you could have a holiday or a few nights' out.

antrobus

beautiful_ravens wrote: »

Seriously?

Yes.

thecatwithnotail wrote: »

I'm being glib, ravens - we just both want something that gives security to him.

Glib or not. Such things do exist. Just type "cohabitation agreement" into Google. You can get a template for just £14.99.

hazyjo wrote: »

I think you should definitely charge rent....

Then you'd need a rent agreement, or even a lease. Same difference really.

Mojisola

hazyjo wrote: »

I think you should definitely charge rent.

It depends on what the relationship is - if thecat and her partner are thinking of themselves as a couple, one paying rent to the other would be a bit strange. They will be thinking of themselves as a family unit and need to reassess their financial life accordingly.

He will be saving a lot of money as he won't be paying rent. If he contributes to the utilities, she won't be spending as much.

heartbreak_star

Person_one wrote: »

Hang on a minute, he's requested the redecorating but only offered to pay for half?

If you were happy with it the way it was and its only him who wants the change I think he should up his generosity a bit, pay for the lot, and be grateful to you for letting him make major changes to your home so soon!

If it's replastering etc, that's work that needs doing should they ever want to sell, and the quicker it's done the cheaper it will be.

I have moved in with my OH, he owns the house. He was thinking about redecoration when I moved in. I contributed to the bathroom, paid for the bedroom, and he paid for the hall (which I didn't think needed doing anyway). I don't pay him rent as such but give him a set sum each month which he splits between bills and expenses as necessary, and I buy in one of our two loads of shopping. No fuss, nice and simple, he's better with figures than I am (and couldn't live without mega-internet and Sky, both of which are luxuries to me rather than necessities).

Cohabiting is only as stringent/difficult as you make it.

HBS x

Mojisola

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Cohabiting is only as stringent/difficult as you make it.

It's not so much the cohabiting - it's what happens if the relationship breaks down. It's a common story that people say "I'd never have believed she/he could start behaving like that towards me" when the house owner puts the ex out on the street with no notice or the ex starts legal action because they've gained rights to the property.

raven83

thecatwithnotail wrote: »

After three years of living apart my partner and I are moving in together. He rents his flat, I own mine and I have space, so for now he's moving into my flat.

He's gently requested that I get some decorating done before he moves in which is totally fine as I've lived by myself for the best part of ten years and not really bothered. He has offered to pay for half of the cost of decorating three rooms - and as they need to be replastered etc, the costs are starting to run up quite high.

We've both agreed that we need some kind of "pre-cohabitation" agreement so that should things not work out, I would give him back whatever he chips in for the decorating.

Does anyone know of a standard sort of legalese document for us to agree this? Something that would have some value in court should I decide I wanted to screw him over? Or would it be worthwhile getting a solicitor to draw something up (seems a bit overkill).

Cheers!

Seems very weird if you ask me. I think if that was me i would feel a bit put out. So if you was to marry would you have a pre nup then?