Being polite/well-mannered towards children (Ranty)

GobbledyGook

Is this an alien concept to some people? Am I really that bizarre in thinking that just because children happen to be smaller than adults (young children in my case given that I'm only a few inches over 5 foot!) it doesn't mean we should show them no basic courtesy or manners at all?

In the past 24 hours I've had two sobbing children thanks to completely rude and inconsiderate adults. Honestly if my children had been so ill mannered to adults I'd be mortified.

Yesterday in the shopping centre my eldest was a little in front of us and held the door open for a woman who then took the door from her. My younger daughter was coming behind and the eldest (and she) assumed the "lady" was going to hold the door and pass it on in the same way........no she let it go and it swung back and smacked my daughter. It was a heavy door and the way it caught her it knocked her right off her feet. She's got a scraped chin and forehead, a bandaged wrist (was great fun spending 4 hours at A+E with 3 kids) and scraped knees. More than anything though she's really upset, as it her sister. The woman just looked, tutted and walked away!

Then today eldest is out playing with some other children in the street. They are roller skating up and down the path. They are honestly being well behaved, and they are on the side of the road that the path is smooth tarmac so there is no annoying noise of them going over slab edges (the other side is like that). New neighbour, who is deeply unpopular after just 3 weeks of moving in which is quite a feat in this area, drives up while the girls were sat on the pavement fixing their helmets. Instead of politely asking them to move he tells them to "F****** shift" (I know he did because 3 different children went home to parents and used the exact same phrase), beeps the horn when they take a moment too long and most annoyingly has parked his car across the pavement instead of going right into his drive (all the houses have dropped kerb) so they can no longer play up and down the path. They are not being noisy and the way the houses are laid out with the drives they'd have to be screaming at full pelt to be heard in the house at all. It also means anyone passing with a pram or wheelchair or whatever has to go on the road. He did the same last weekend when some kids were playing on their bikes. I don't understand why you'd move to a street that prides itself on being a safe haven for children to play in, that has a resident council that does Halloween, Christmas, Easter, Summer events for the children (and he did know before he bought the house it was like this) and that is a very family area (his is the only house where there are no children, bar one elderly couple) then be like that? How to hack off your new neighbours in a few easy steps.

Apologies for the rant, but I'm just so annoyed. How on earth do we expect children to grow up with any manners if adults show none towards them? When did it become such a crime for children to be children and play? It baffles me.

Brighton_belle

Totally agree with you GG.

GobbledyGook

On the upside the police have just told him to move his car. Someone must have phoned them about him blocking the pavement (wasn't me - I didn't realise it was something they could actually do something about because of the dropped kerb). He is not a happy bunny!

skylight

HA HA!! (at the police telling him) Miserable ugger.

kelpie35

Well done to the local police :j

Gigglepig

Many people do not help with doors even for disabled or frail looking elderly people, so I wouldn't count on it for a child. Many people just are not that considerate in general, it may have nothing to do with being inconsiderate to kids.

There have been a few posts on here recently regarding issues with kids playing on streets. I think it is really sad that they cannot play in their neighbourhood, but clearly some people find it irritating and are concerned with potential damage to cars, fences etc. Someone also mentioned that kids should go to the local play park nearby, rather than be in the street. Others seem to dislike kids "hanging around" in general.

Did the kids sit in front of his driveway, so he had to wait? From his point of view he probably does not want to be inconvenienced by kids even for a split second.

Anyway it sounds like this is just one really grumpy guy in an otherwise nice neighbourhood, I hope the rest of you can just ignore him and carry on enjoying your community. Hopefully being spoken to by the police may make him think twice next time?

faerie~spangles

Nice one, I suppose he reckoned he owns the pavement.

cherylim

Glad the police said something!

I live in a nice neighbourhood, too. The children play in the streets and I've even seen them on our front lawn - I'm fine with that as long as they do no lasting damage. My only concern is when they play in the road right on the corner - we're a cul-de-sac so I don't mind them being on the road further down, but once or twice I've turned the corner to find them right in front of me. Shocks me, then, that the parents say nothing.

It's not just rudeness to kids, though. I'm regularly having doors dropped on me by people who stare straight ahead and pretend not to see me, or rush through without paying attention. I also recently parked outside a house to drop off a child at the children's home next door, only to have the homeowner storm out say 'what are you doing parking there?'. I simply stared for a second and went to move away, and he carried on glaring back - the child I was with said 'she'll only be a minute', and we walked off. He was still standing staring at my car when I returned two minutes later, so I got in and said nothing, set my SatNav up and drove away with him watching all the while.

Apparently, people think they own the pavement now.

hardpressed

I so agree, how can we expect respect from our children if we don't treat them with respect.

Sally_A

Firstly, congratulations on teaching your children to have good manners, I hope they are not put off by the incident and will continue to be considerate. I will always thank people that hold a door open for me, be it in the office with people I know, or a complete stranger holding open a shop door. Yes, the norm is that you hold open the door, and they in turn hold the door for the next person. Unfortunately there are some miserable boggers around who can niether acknowledge or thank a child that does this.

As for the neighbour parking on the pavement and telling the kiddies to effing shift.....have you seen the website "youparklikeac***.com" :cool::cool: embarass him with a photo and a yplac parking ticket.

GobbledyGook

Gigglepig wrote: »

Did the kids sit in front of his driveway, so he had to wait? From his point of view he probably does not want to be inconvenienced by kids even for a split second.

No they weren't sat on the ground. On of the girls' helemet strap had come slightly loose so they were adjusting it. They weren't any longer than if someone had just been walking by, in fact if he hadn't sworn at them and frightened them they'd probably have moved quicker.

I wouldn't have assumed about the door either, but eldest thought it was obvious she was holding the door for her sister (they were speaking to each other) so when the lady made to take the door from her she just assumed the woman would do the polite thing. Younger daughter was only a few steps behind the woman (hence getting cracked so hard).


Cherylim - People's obsessiveness/sense of ownership of parking spaces near their houses baffle me! There's a woman in the next street who is quite well known round here for parking in the space on her "front" just so that no-one else can despite the fact she's got a double garage and space for 3/4 cars. It's madness.

Kids playing in the road isn't good. One of the things I do love about living here is that if one of mine strayed onto the road the neighbours wouldn't hesitate to tell her off (only the girls are old enough to play out) and I'd get a text or call to let me know. Same if I spot someone else's child too.

Fingers crossed the police coming out might make him a bit less grumpy. It'll be a long summer if it doesn't. I actually feel sorry for him - the "community council" are a bit of a nightmare if you cross them. Though I daresay having the invitation to Mr & Mrs Chairpersons annual BBQ might not bother him :rotfl: