Having a "healthy" dog put to sleep

preferanonymity

Hi all.

I'm a longtime lurker here, but this is my first post.

I'll try to be as straight to the point as possible. This post raises some sensitive issues. Sorry to be quite blunt about some matters. This is also a long post.

In November last year, my dad died and left behind a 10 (now 11) year old border collie, Bonnie. Female, spayed, in very good health despite age. Dad had her since she was a pup.

Dad was housebound for the last 5 years of his life, so him and Bonnie were always together (other than when she was walked by family members). Dad was also single and not very socially active (other than family), so it was literally just him and her, 99% of the time.

Since dad passed, we've tried our best to home Bonnie in the most loving, appropriate, active and stimulating environment possible. She was wonderfully behaved in every respect when dad was alive - the perfect dog - but she changed, immediately, and for the worse.

She cannot be left alone for literally minutes. If she's left alone, she barks, howls, scratches (doors, furniture), soils, chews, etc. She does this even if you just leave the room and accidentally close the door behind her. We've tried everything imaginable to settle her and to cure her crippling separation anxiety, including leaving her alone for gradually longer periods of time, so she can just 'tough it out'.

But, nope, whether it's two minutes or two hours alone, all hell breaks loose. It's become increasingly distressing (and expensive!) for me and my OH, but more importantly, it's quite obviously distressing for her. We simply cannot be with her 100% of the time, much as we'd like to.

We've been attempting to re-home her for several months now, but we've found nowhere for her, probably because we've been very upfront about her issues (and, because she's old). We contacted an older animals' charity who advised she'd be hard pressed to find a home. We also (out of curiosity only) contacted a local dogs' shelter, who flatly refused her.

We gave her to another family member who really wanted to give her a chance, but she had to come back to us after a couple of weeks because despite their best efforts, they couldn't cope either. She was distraught to give Bonnie back, but we understood.

On top of it all, Bonnie 'paces' constantly, as though she's anxious. She barely sleeps (she used to love a snooze!!), despite being well-exercised, and has also taken to biting off her own fur on her legs, thighs and flank. She 'knows' me and my OH well, and has done all her life. We can only assume that her discomfort arises from her situation, rather than from us as people!

We've spoken to one vet (her usual), who advised that she should be PTS, because she'll never recover from the trauma she's suffered.

We were alarmed at the vet recommending euthanasia for a 'healthy' dog, so we sought a second opinion from another vet, who made the same conclusion.

We tried to get her into behavioural classes, but as the co-ordinator explained, there's nothing wrong with her behaviour. He explained that as a formerly well-trained Collie, she 'knows' it all, but is acting up out of distress (yup, he also recommended she be PTS!).

Unless we can find someone who is literally housebound and can be with her 100% of the time (and, God knows, we've tried), I don't see a future for Bonnie, and don't think she can 'bounce back' at her age. On the other hand, I am devastated at the prospect of having a (physically) healthy dog PTS. It seems so callous.

Any opinions??

McKneff

ooh, I cant help but I just wanted to say how sad the situation is.

Could I suggest you have a couple of cushions/blankets with your dads smell on them. It may help. I hope so, I really hope so.

MILLYMOLLY

Such a sad situation to be in:(:( for you and Bonnie.

I know it's a hard decision but if everyone is recommending she be PTS you will need to consider it, especially if she is suffering emotionally.

I don't think this will be either an easy or quick decision for you.

gettingready

Sorry - do not have any suggestions ...

What a terrible situation for the dog and all involved....

ammonite

Don't know what to suggest really except a friends dog was like this from a puppy. Turns out it hated being left in a room with a shut door. They couldn't let it loose around the house whilst they were out so they got a baby gate for it so it could see out of the room it was being kept in...the crying, the howling, the soiling gradually decreased with a noticeable improvement in the first instance.

Really hope you can find a solution. The poor little dog and poor you too x

preferanonymity

Thanks for the input guys. In my heart of hearts, I know (well, think I know) that her being PTS might be the kindest thing, but can't bring myself to do it just yet!

I know it's only really mine and my OH's decision to make, but we've been bombarded with hugely conflicting advice from friends and family. Funnily enough, those who have called us 'cruel' (and there's been lots) are those who have refused our offer for them to 'babysit' her for an hour or two!

It's so frustrating because she clearly assumes that if we've left her alone for 30 seconds, we're not coming back. She must fear that like her 'dad', we're going to suddenly drop off the face of the earth with no warning. Dad died unexpectedly, but if we had been expecting it, we probably would've weaned Bonnie off the love of her life gradually!

I wish there was some way to get through to her that we're here for the long haul (hopefully), but sadly there obviously isn't

whitewing

I don't have a dog or know much about them.

Does it make a difference if you leave the TV or a radio on, and as someone said, have a jumper or pillow with your or dad's smell on?

Also (this may not be a good idea), would a baby monitor help so that you could speak to the dog while it is in the room on its own.

It does sound like there is a lot of emotional pain, so while I understand it is a healthy dog, don't underestimate the effect of its grief.

preferanonymity

whitewing wrote: »

Does it make a difference if you leave the TV or a radio on, and as someone said, have a jumper or pillow with your or dad's smell on?

We tried both of these things, with no luck. We used to have dad's favourite old dressing gown that was probably stinking to high heaven of him (;)), but it didn't settle her.

moomin5

Must be hard for you , Dogs seem better able to recover from trauma than humans, but i imagine she needs to gradually adapt to change and being left which can take long time, which it doesn't sound like you can provide & if you can't find a better home situation to see if it will help her then i think PTS is reasonable given her distress.

Patricia Mcconnell has a booklet - I'll be home soon about SA may help and medication can assist to reduce anxiety until they learn to cope but not sure if that's as common route here as US.

Was it Oldies Clubyou contacted? If your family can pay for her upkeep, perhaps there is someone who can take her on as a long-term foster who can offer more 24/7 company & work on the SA. Does she get on well with other dogs?

preferanonymity

moomin5 wrote: »

Hi Moomin, thanks for the links.

It was indeed Oldies Club we contacted. As well as another one whose name I can't recall (sorry it was several months ago). The second place didn't actually home dogs, but passed on the advice referred to in my OP anyway.

Oldies Club was a bit strange. The woman I spoke to on the phone was quite curt. Her opening line was that a dog of this age is difficult to home (which I understood, but found weird, because of the nature of their work!). This was before Bonnie's 'problems' were explained. We exchanged several emails and and phonecalls, and it was decided that Bonnie would not be actively advertised due to her specific needs, but we would be informed if a suitable foster arose for her. Nothing yet (she's been on their books 6 months now).

moomin5

Does seem strange, perhaps she was just having bad day. Homing has become difficult for rescues in general with the economy, but there are people that adopt older dogs & those with issues. Perhaps try border collie rescues if you've not already.