Question for anyone who has a child with autism or special needs

teabag29

Do they find p.e difficult and if so what support if any do they get from school?

Dd has recently been diagnosed with pda (on the autistic spectrum) and is undergoing statutory assessment which I have had to fight to get...obviously a statement isn't guaranteed but heading in the right direction. Dd also has learning difficulties and currently functions emotionally and educationally age 6/7, her actual age is 13 (14 in November).

Pda is non curable and basically a person with pda cannot cope with demands and need to be in control and will go to any lengths to avoid demands, these kids have high anxiety and have regular meltdowns usually calmed by role playing. They also have all the other traits of autism (communication problems/interaction/sensory issues etc) but unlike autism itself these kids do have imagination.

Anyway just got a call from pe teacher saying dd point blank refusing to do pe again and runs off when given detention (she's 13).

So far she has been able to hold her anxiety together at school up until easter where she tried to take her own life, since then she's started to show her other side at school and her behaviour has gone very downhill.

Camhs said when she has her bad days not to take her to school if its making her want to kill herself and ive found giving her a few days off when her anxiety is high works well....trouble is pe makes her very anxious.

I have explained everything to the teacher, how she has pda and her mental state at present and how she's undergong statutory assessment. The teacher said I understand and will support her as best I can but she still needs to do pe or gets detention. She then said that my dd was sat next to her glaring at her as we spoke (which I thought was a rather poor way to talk about her) and that she has to keep her pe kit at school and they will wash it there so that she cant pull the 'ive forgot my kit' line.

I understand pe is part of the curriculum but if its a choice between her wanting to kill herself and me having to pull her out of school or them pulling her out of pe I know which i'd prefer. Rant over....I'm now dreading 16.30 when I pick her up after her detention because I know it's gonna take me hours to calm her (

LandyAndy

Unfortunately the understanding of ASD among mainstream staff is still poor and PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance for anyone who didn't know) is even less understood.

I would have a meeting with the headteacher asap to discuss all the implications of the recent diagnosis.

Not saying that will solve things but it would put all your concerns on record at the level at which action can be taken.

marisco_2

teabag29 wrote: »

I have explained everything to the teacher, how she has pda and her mental state at present and how she's undergong statutory assessment. The teacher said I understand and will support her as best I can but she still needs to do pe or gets detention.(

I cant quite believe just how much the teacher contradicted herself in that one sentence. Clearly when you explained everything to her about your daughters condition and state of mind it went in one ear and out of the other. You dont help a child like your daughter by punishing them with detentions if they dont conform. That doesn't aid them at all and will just add to her upset and anxiety levels. As you quite rightly say it will take you a long time to bring her down from that when you collect her.

You have tried to work with the teacher but your daughters needs are not currently being met. I would ask to speak with the Senco and try to involve the teacher as well and get your message across much more strongly. Your childs state of mind and welfare are paramount to everything else. Especially participating in a pe lesson.

Callie22

Can you get a doctor's note to state that for 'medical reasons' your daughter must not do PE? It's not an ideal solution but from personal experience I know it can work.

whitewing

teabag,

Perhaps it would help if you had alternate plans for her during pe time. Is pe usually at the end of the school day? If so, could she just be let out early?

If she could be off school premises or properly occupied eg on work experience, that may help the school deal with it.

Perhaps Connexions can help you think of something?

kingfisherblue

My son has Down's Syndrome, with numerous medical conditions. Swimming is part of the curriculum, but he is excused, as I refuse to allow him to use the cold and draughty swimming baths, then go outdoors (not necessarily dry on his body, and definitely with wet hair). I need to lookm after his health needs and has a low immune system, I don't want him to get a chill. Add in the fact that he is terrified of a large swimming pool - it was only two years ago that we managed to get him paddling in a few inches.

I spoke to the school and pointed out why swimming is an unsuitable activity for my son. They were fine and accepted it, and I send in puzzles for him to do during the time others in his class are in the water (two girls do not swim either).

I would speak to the SENCo and if you get no joy, speak to the head teacher. If you still have no joy, contact your local Parent Partnership - your council will have the number.

peachyprice

My son hated PE with a vengeance because it highlighted how different he was from other children, the only PE he liked was swimming, because in water no-one could really tell that his technique was different.

Have you had any contact with occupational therapy? My son's OT unit ran a club for SN children, they used a SN school that has lots of specialist equipment, on a Saturday morning. It was fantastic, if gave the children the chance to learn sports without 'normal' children making fun and gave them a great deal of confidence to actually try more at school because they'd had the extra practice. It also made them realise that they weren't the only children who couldn't throw, kick, catch or bat a ball or run very fast etc. It made them feel far less alone than trying sport at school.

Perhaps you could have a word with your local OT, they may run something similar.

dizzyblonde82

My son is 6 years old and was diagnosed as being autistic about 12 months ago, he used to get distressed getting changed for PE and it was his worst time at school.

A year later and he does get changed for PE but they let him just sit and watch if he does not want to join in, part of his issue now is that he doesn't have the balance and co-ordination like other children so feels embarrassed if he cant catch the ball etc.

My son has a full statement and a one-on-one teaching assistant at all times of the school day, they have been working on his balance and he is starting to want to join in with PE but it is a long slow process.

I don't think that detention is the way forward to encourage and help your child to join in with PE.

This morning my son was kicking, screaming and causing chaos in the playground before school but his teacher is fantastic and helped calm him down, your child needs support to learn to deal with situations they find uncomfortable.

Spottedleopard

I had cerebal palsay and was excused from PE if I wanted to be. Contact the school SENCO.

Candy53

My son is autistic, and is grown up now.

He would never do PE or 'any' kind of sport because he simply didn't understand what he had to do. I was told at the school for autism that he started to go to at 8 years old, that none of the autistic children did sport for the same reason, and this is a common symptom, if you like, of autism.
We tried to get him playing football in the garden and when it was kicked to him he just picked it up and 'studied it.'

Once your DD has got her statement, you should get a copy of it, then show it to her teachers, as they should not be trying to force her to do PE when she probably has no perception of what it is that is expected of her, and that would be cruel.

Just thought... Can't remember the process now, was a long time ago, but a copy of your DD's statement will I think be given to the school anyway.

Best Wishes,
Candy

GlasweJen

I did PE, I hated it but my mum wouldn't let me skip it as she wanted me to function as an adult and adults need to do things that they don't necessarily like. It was an important lesson.