Advice needed

lostinrates

lika_86 wrote: »

Although further to my above post, I'd let him off now to be honest, especially if you want him to go on a last family holiday with you too. If he's taken a gap year then his mates will have all summer off, let him have a bit of time with them.

But if he had not been going to university he would be in the work place (hopefully) with say 21 days off, to do all that stuff like organise life in.

It was my experience those of us who had jobs at uni got more out of it. We knew the value of money and education, and had learned to manage time.

Your son sounds like he has done realy well, i would suggest four weeks before his semester start date, and help gatheting things together from now on.

Dunroamin

lika_86 wrote: »

Although further to my above post, I'd let him off now to be honest, especially if you want him to go on a last family holiday with you too. If he's taken a gap year then his mates will have all summer off, let him have a bit of time with them.

I know money isn't everything but, if he stops working now, he'll not only lose out on 8 weeks' earnings (compared to working until mid August) but he'll get through most of his savings in the 12 weeks until term starts.

(I'm quite surprised how so many people think that this lad has done something amazing by working full time for 9 months and that he needs several weeks to recover from it!)

HeatherintheHills

mountainofdebt wrote: »

I know he's worked hard over the last 9 months or so - 7.30 starts and 9.00pm finishes have been the norm and that hasn't included the 40 minutes travel time so I don't want to appear too mean but at the same time, I don't want to be a pushover.

So what would be a reasonable end date for me to suggest?

So effectively his working day including travel would have been about 16 hours? Those are very long days at his age, his social life must have been non existent during his working week.

Are you planning a 2 week family holiday (how do you get a 19 (?) y/o to go on holiday with Mum and Dad)? Say another 2 weeks to do some studying, packing and job hunting before he goes. I'd say another 2 weeks for the lad to call his own wouldn't be unreasonable. He has proved he is a hard worker and will need time to catch his breath before the demands of uni/jobs start.

LandyAndy

I'd say organise your holiday ( assuming he wants to go) to finish a week before term starts. Then suggest he resigns a week before the holiday starts.

Brighton_belle

Dunroamin wrote: »

(I'm quite surprised how so many people think that this lad has done something amazing by working full time for 9 months and that he needs several weeks to recover from it!)

^^ this.
I worked for 4 years from age 16 before going to uni. I finshed my job on the Friday and started uni on the Monday. I packed over the weekend.

I'd suggest September off max.

lika_86

Whilst I'm not saying he's done anything exceptional (although it does sound like he was doing long days), he's still just a boy really, other than the next few years, when else will he have so much time to just be? He has the rest of his life to work ahead of him.

Also to those saying he'll go through his savings in 8 weeks, surely he will have minimal expenditure? I assume he's still living at home and so will be rent free and mostly expenditure free, whilst I personally would expect to pay board and lodgings if I returned home after university, my mum never would have dreamed of accepting money during the university holidays for such things.

Better to ease him back into doing nothing than having him go nuts about going out and sleeping all day in his first two months of university because he didn't get a summer.

Dunroamin

lika_86 wrote: »

Whilst I'm not saying he's done anything exceptional (although it does sound like he was doing long days), he's still just a boy really, other than the next few years, when else will he have so much time to just be? He has the rest of his life to work ahead of him.
.

Well, if his university days are anything like many of ours, he'll have the next three years for a start!

I don't really see why his parents should keep him in idleness for a couple of months (given that working was the condition for supporting him during his gap year) and, if he wants to spend it with his friends, it won't be cheap at this age.

As for the long days, the OP says he's been working 40 hour weeks so I don't think that the 7.30 starts and the 9.00 pm finishes have been on the same day, or certainly not every day!

Alikay

I'd have said 2 or 3 weeks before he goes is plenty of time off. A week away with the family and a week or so to get his uni bits n bobs together, say his goodbyes to mates at home and give his room a good clear out.

He's going to uni, not joining the Marines, so he'll have time for relaxing and socialising during freshers' week.

Wilma33

I would say 4 weeks. 1 week on holiday with you, 1 week to read up on uni stuff, 1 week to buy stuff for uni and pack and 1 week off to see friends and family to say bye.

msnigella

If he's been working full time he will most likely have accrued some annual leave. So could he hand in his notice for eg. end of August but take the last 2/3 weeks of that month as leave?