My SOA - huge life change/income drop please help!

Cariad9

I've just spent half an hour replying to this and it's disappeared into cyber world.... ahhhhh.... lets try again!

Ok, first off didn't mean to cause quite so much controversy! I'm well aware my budget is lacking, which is why I'm on here asking for help! When I did my SOA I based it on £30 a week drinks at home, 2 meals out a month and £20 a week (average) for a friday night drink. That didn't seem too bad until I saw it added up to a monthly amount which I agree looks quite horrendous - but that's the point in doing this isn't it?

Notatvstar - Thank you so much for your advice. OH is a baby (I'm the older woman lol!) so wouldn't qualify for the loans you mentioned. However have looked at forces discounts and have already got 50% off our AA breakdown cover, which is a start! Our debts pretty much come from his first year of service. I see it a lot that these young single lads, a lot living away from the parents for the first time, are offered loans and credit cards and go mad for a year. They then spend the next decade paying for it. We currently live 200+ miles apart, I'm in Cheshire and he's in Norfolk which simply isn't working. Fuel prices don't help but the 5 hour commute every weekend is a killer, also OH is finding it hard to fit in as he's not on base fri - mon.

The social isolation is a big worry for me, which is maybe why I'm focusing too much on socialising. We will be going from never having lived together to being in each other pockets - I think it's important that maintain interests and friends away from each other. It's a big change and I want to do all I can to ensure our marrage doesn't suffer. We have argued before over money as he went straight from living at home to RAF (unlike me who lived on my own for 10 years)so can be a bit clueless over the real cost of things and I try hard not to be the nagging wife!

With regards to Council Tax / Water, I suspected that it wasn't the same as civy world but trying to get details out of OH.....

If I do find full time employment I think we will look at living off. However as I've always lived in the centre of a large town/city I've never learnt to drive. I'm regretting this now as I've already have to turn down one interview as there was simply no way of getting there, public transport in Norfolk is diabolical!

Miketaff1408 - Thanks for your post. I have £2200 on the 6.8% card and £2,800 on the 0% card. I've just paid off the overdraft - this was 19% with a £5 monthly fee so thought it was best to pay that off first. I've had a think about what you said about savings v debt repayment - we currently have £1000 in our regular savings account which I think is adequate for emergency / family funds so am going to divert the £100 that was going there to pay off the 6.8% card.

Back to budget:

Eating out. This is getting scrapped completely. Cooking is the only domestic skill I have so should take advantage of it! Saving £86.67.

Drinks from home:This is getting reduced to £20 a week which is enough for a couple of bottles of wine and a crate of lager which will be fine for one evening a week to have friends over (or a sunny day in the garden). I know a lot of people will still think this is high.... I should ask people to bring there own but I was brought up that good hospitality was paying / doing everything which is hard to shrug off.... blame the parents! Saving £45

Drinking out: I'm not going to change this for the moment. I agree that it is too high but need to work out what is 'social' drinking and what is 'obligation' drinking! However it will do me good to ease off the wine and switch to soft drinks so definitely room for movement.

Haircuts: Hi-lights are going :eek:saving £20

New Clothes: Not too bothered about me - I have far too many anyway - but OH goes through trainers like there's no tomorrow. Revised budget £30. Saving £20.

Groceries: I'll have all day to batch cook (one advantage of being unemployed!) and I do remember back in my single days of spending a lot less. Revised Budget £30 a week / £130 a month. Saving £81.

Smoking - we've pledged to give up when we move, however from past experience one of us usually caves within a week. So trying to have my realistic head on.

Hopefully Council tax and water will be less - I'll find this out when we move.

And I promise I will give serious consideration into the whole 'socialising budget'! I would like to make it clear though that this is not about me going out and getting trollied but social obligations and making new friends when I'm 200 miles away from anyone I know. Which in this culture does seem to revolve around going to the pub!

The above seems to put me back to positive figures but any more help or tips appreciated. Thanks.

katsu

AA discount sounds good but look at coverage like Autonational or Autoaid. Autoaid is £38 (ish) for a year for a married couple and offers the same cover as top level £200-ish AA/RAC! Martin's motoring tab tells you all about it. I used Autoaid and it was fine.

Def start thinking of christmas now - making gifts - if you cook try jam hampers etc.

For books, def use a library (free and will lead to interesting ideas) - maybe give yourself £10 for the CS books after you've made the budgets balance - or, even better, do surveys for Amazon vouchers and then use them to buy books from the marketplace for free. The survey vouchers could also help with Christmas gifts too.

See if you can find a local beauty college cheap salon for your hair cuts and colours. Or they might be cheap on the base?

I am sure you will settle in and be happy. Good luck.

notatvstar

Caraid9 - you seemed to have been on a fairly decent wage - so I'm going to assume that you're in possession of a decent skill set. I know Norfolk seems pretty rural - but have you checked the local papers/ online job lists for ALL the towns in the area to get an idea of what's going and where you'll find it. I know Norfolk (a bit) - I'm sort of near(ish) and it is pretty rural. Very pretty though .

No worries about me replying to your thread. I feel for you and I know what it's like. Have you to been to the 'Old School' thread? There's a tonne of good advice about reducing shopping bills.

Take heart - you may meet a group of people that you'll fit in with very well and have a ball! I know you're nervous and worried about what's around the corner, as 'The Patch' can sometimes seem a closed shop. I've met some really great women at 'Dos' even though I've chosen to live out and I keep in touch with them via facebook as and when people get posted.

You've made a decent start in recognising there is a problem with your finances, and you are taking very positive steps in trying to address that issue.

I wish you well.