Quitting work to be a sahm?

Nicki

Have you checked the pension situation fully? I gave up work 10 years ago due to a combination of a new baby with a serious disability and my own ill health, and although DH does pay into my private pension, the government has capped the payments he can make on my behalf at a much lower level than I was paying before. So although I will be entitled to more than the state pension, my total pension will be quite small. I had been paying in at the maximum allowed for 15 years when I stopped work at age 32, but the impact on me at age 65 will be significant.

SqueekyMouse

A permanent contract working in a research lab is very impressive. It's a difficult one, because I doubt you'd find that much job stability in the future.

I used to work in a biochem lab before having my baby, but was made redundant (=came to the end of my fixed term contract) while on mat leave so had the decision on whether or not to go back to work taken away from me.

Taking your long commute, the fact that you'd not be finacialy worse off and they huge bonus that you actually would get to spend time and raise your children... I'd quit and be a SAHM. I love it, I'm sure you would too.

I think you should also consider you illness in this decision, does workplace stress cause further problems, so from a health perspective would you be better off not working.

In terms of working in the future, have you considered scientific writing/editing/proof reading for publications etc which could also be done from home

FBaby

You also need to factor that your youngest will be starting school soon, so not only you won't see him as much, you would also finally be better off soon financially.

If you've been counting the months until your childcare cost finally goes down and you have more money to do other things, you might miss this expected extra income. If however you've been happy with your current combined income as it is, then I would give it up. Your experience and education is such that even taking some years out, you should still be attractive to prospective employers if you want to get back to employment at some stage.

rev229

I have just returned to work after a 7 yr break to care for my 2 kids both with special needs now 13 & 15 and a DH who had crohns and was very unwell and had 2 major operations and a few minor, All I can say thank god I had a job to return to! I have been bored beyond bored. Loved my job but had no real choice but to give it up. Never planned a 7 yr break 2-3 but then had a serious car accident so was unable to work. I only work 2 days at the moment, but love being back at work. And I have been lucky to return to my old job. Do what you feel is best for you, we are all different and I have never felt bad about being a working mum,or having to tighten the belt when I stopped! we learnt to live on one wage very well. I get my first wage tomorrow, not even excited, it is going straight into the mortgage!

meritaten

sorry, but when you say you only see your child for an hour or so each day and then say you have a 20 hour commute each week - I have to wonder what your priorities are?
see your child or travel and work? and if you are no better off, than thats a no-brainer.
and for those who say that they think that bringing up children is boring - then they havent done it! Children stretch you in ways work will never do. and seeing life from a childs viewpoint is NEVER boring!
life is what you make it - and if you make childcare boring you are not fit to bring up children!

Person_one

meritaten wrote: »

sorry, but when you say you only see your child for an hour or so each day and then say you have a 20 hour commute each week - I have to wonder what your priorities are?
see your child or travel and work? and if you are no better off, than thats a no-brainer.
and for those who say that they think that bringing up children is boring - then they havent done it! Children stretch you in ways work will never do. and seeing life from a childs viewpoint is NEVER boring!
life is what you make it - and if you make childcare boring you are not fit to bring up children!

If you tried really really hard you could probably be a tiny bit more judgemental.

Mojisola

meritaten wrote: »

sorry, but when you say you only see your child for an hour or so each day and then say you have a 20 hour commute each week - I have to wonder what your priorities are?
see your child or travel and work? and if you are no better off, than thats a no-brainer.
and for those who say that they think that bringing up children is boring - then they havent done it! Children stretch you in ways work will never do. and seeing life from a childs viewpoint is NEVER boring!
life is what you make it - and if you make childcare boring you are not fit to bring up children!

I find child rearing to be very satisfying but not all people are the same. There are some personality types who would hate being at home with small children. Anyone who is like this won't be doing themselves or their children any favours by being a SAHP.

Everyone has to work out what suits them best. A happy fulfilled working parent is going to be a much better parent than a frustrated SAHP.

Marisco

meritaten wrote: »

sorry, but when you say you only see your child for an hour or so each day and then say you have a 20 hour commute each week - I have to wonder what your priorities are?
see your child or travel and work? and if you are no better off, than thats a no-brainer.
and for those who say that they think that bringing up children is boring - then they havent done it! Children stretch you in ways work will never do. and seeing life from a childs viewpoint is NEVER boring!
life is what you make it - and if you make childcare boring you are not fit to bring up children!

Really? I have done it, and did find it boring! I would find being a molecular biologist far more interesting - so go on, shoot me!:D

LandyAndy

Marisco wrote: »

Really? I have done it, and did find it boring! I would find being a molecular biologist far more interesting - so go on, shoot me!:D

:T:T

I won't be shooting you.;)

Mupette

you say you have crohns (i have ms i know very different illnesses but lifelong)

I took 2 1/2 years out of work to concentrate on me, learning about ms and coping and managing..

what if you were to do the same, especially having more time to home cooking to help? i honestly don't know much about crohns but would this help?

Getiing the children involved in helping with the chickens, maybe next year start a small veggie plot,

started a very very small plot this year just to see what i could germinate, everything got planted yesterday so the rest is up to mother nature.

sahm i would say yes, you miss so much of the lo's lives so if you can afford to do it then do it