Benefits to being married?

Going4TheDream

Mojisola wrote: »

That's the vital fact. If you die intestate, only blood relations can inherit.

I still don't see how his brothers were entitled to anything unless their mother passed some of her inheritance to them.

I think that is what happened to be honest, and the same with my BF being gifted also, which likely came from his own mothers portion. I just told by BF about your post as we always wondered why it all seemed so comlicated, so thank you, we learned something we didnt know!

Mojisola

Going4TheDream wrote: »

I think that is what happened to be honest, and the same with my BF being gifted also, which likely came from his own mothers portion. I just told by BF about your post as we always wondered why it all seemed so comlicated, so thank you, we learned something we didnt know!

It shows how vital it is for the parents to make wills when there are step-children involved.

Has your BF's mother made a will?

Going4TheDream

Mojisola wrote: »

It shows how vital it is for the parents to make wills when there are step-children involved.

Has your BF's mother made a will?

I believe she has, bf is her only child and she has never remarried and wont.

margaretclare

Marisco wrote: »

I don't get a private pension. I also get some from my ex husbands' NI, but if I got married I'd lose that. I didn't have the full amount because of being a SAHM. I did look into it before I retired, with a view to getting married purely for the legalities. I don't know the nuts and bolts of it, all I know is if I got married I'd get less pension.

This is something that niggles me a bit. My DH's ex is claiming SRP based on his contributions, and they were divorced in 1999! Apparently she'll be able to claim this for ever and ever amen, no matter how long she lives or even if he dies (she won't know this) and in the meantime it will pay her not to remarry even if she found someone to be with who might want to marry her. In the meantime I claim SRP in my own right and it makes no difference whether we're married or not. Our reasons for getting married had nothing to do with money at all.

As you were a SAHM didn't you qualify for HRP for the years you were at home?

Marisco

margaretclare wrote: »

This is something that niggles me a bit. My DH's ex is claiming SRP based on his contributions, and they were divorced in 1999! Apparently she'll be able to claim this for ever and ever amen, no matter how long she lives or even if he dies (she won't know this) and in the meantime it will pay her not to remarry even if she found someone to be with who might want to marry her. In the meantime I claim SRP in my own right and it makes no difference whether we're married or not. Our reasons for getting married had nothing to do with money at all.

As you were a SAHM didn't you qualify for HRP for the years you were at home?

Why? It doesn't affect your oh's pension in the least.

I was divorced in 1994

Does it matter if the person (in this case me) couldn't care less about being married?

No idea! Before I retired I filled in all the paperwork, with all the information they asked me for, sent it away, and got told what I would receive. I don't think it said that there was an allowance for HRP. Is it retrospective? I was a SAHM in the 70's, had various part time work (not always paying NI) in the 80's, but I never went onto that "married womens" stamp, I always paid full stamp when I paid it.

When we got divorced, I asked nothing of him after 25 years. I could have gone for some of his private pension (got all the usual "go for it" etc) and I would have been in clover now, he has a brilliant PP. But it was his not mine, he worked and paid for it, not me. So I don't really think that having an extra few quid off his NI conts is too much, especially as it affects him not one jot!

margaretclare

It's the principle of the thing. DH insisted on having a 'clean break' divorce. Clean break means....clean break. Neither party can come on to the other in time to come, even if one wins the lottery. Divorce is final. That's it. End of story.

I never agreed with the idea of claiming SRP against my deceased husband's contributions, and when I remarried, I just carried on receiving SRP plus SERPS against my own contribution record. The only thing we get differently from being married is married people's tax allowance, and we split that between us to set against our individual tax liability. It's not an awful lot in the scheme of things, but because it's there, we claimed it.

If you always paid full contributions when you were at work you should have been entitled to Home Responsibilities Protection from 1978 for the time you were at home. It would be worth enquiring about this even now. You might be pleasantly surprised.

PS: It DOES matter to me, being married. Put it down to the way I was brought up.

margaretclare

Mojisola wrote: »

It shows how vital it is for the parents to make wills when there are step-children involved.

Has your BF's mother made a will?

Yes, this is true.

We were told that if you state in your will 'my children or grandchildren' only the direct descendants - biological - are included. If you have stepchildren or step-grandchildren as we have, it's necessary to name them individually.

A few years ago now when I was working as a maternity nurse I stayed with a family for 3 weeks and got to know them all very well, in fact we've never lost contact. At the time they had a housekeeper and her partner also came to do the garden. They'd been together for 12 years in an unmarried but loving partnership. She died. I went to the funeral and was horrified to find that her partner was sidelined completely. The priest referred to 'her sons' and talked about them in glowing terms, but the man who'd been closest to her than anybody for 12 whole years, was just 'her friend' and he was just pushed out, basically. I hated that.