Hypno's kick up the backside debt diary....

pania

i'm so sorry to hear that hon. are you ok?

hypno06

Yes, I'm ok. Feels a bit strange because I am a bit jealous - my Dad died at 55 and Grandpa has had an extra 40 years that I feel my Dad was robbed of. Stupid, I know, but it just sort of came to the surface and I have to make sure that my "jealousy" and my own grief for my own father does not impede on what OH and his family will be feeling.

Perhaps it is just reminding me that my own grieving is not yet done. I just hope I don't come across as selfish because I would hate to upset anyone else when they have their own grieving to do, if you see what I mean!

Anyway, better go and get DD........running late now!

pania

i completely understand where you are coming from and this will be a harsh reminder of the grief you went through, you don't sound selfish at all. I think you hold a lot of grief for your father still and that will make this all the worse for you.
does length of life = quality of life? i bet your dad packed as much into his 55 years as he possibly could and lived every minute of it. As much as i bet grandad has in his 94 years. big hugs xxx

millionaire_in_training

Hypno I know exactly what you mean. My dad died at 37 and I am quite cynical about old folks dying. I have upset a couple of people by saying folks have had a good innings. Not intentionally just absent mindedly. Now that I am over 37 myself I am not just so bad but I still see a lengthy life as a major bonus. Chin up xx

Seaxwyn

Hello hypno. You feel what you feel and you don't need to be ashamed of it.

Of course this new death will bring up feelings about your loss of your dad, and of course it is much sadder for someone to die at 55 than 94.

That said, all deaths are sad, because that unique person is gone. I surprised myself by how sad I was earlier this year when a 90-year-old friend died. She had a long, rich life, and noone could wish her to hang on any longer, frail and blind, but I feel the world is a poorer place for her not being in it.

atypicalblonde

Hello hun haven't been around for a while but just wanted to say all the best for tomorrow, and I'm sorry to hear about Grandpa. All the best x

hypno06

Thanks guys. Am going to have an early night - take a hot water bottle to bed and snuggle down under the duvet.

see you in the morning xx

Sea78

Hugs Hypno - thinking of you and yours tonight.

Sea xxxx

LookingAhead

Just catching up with a few threads....had a quick skim through yours since my last visit.

Wanted to say good luck and also sorry to hear about Grandpa but I completely understand how you feel too. I think that train of thought, in the circumstances is totally understandable.

I hope hubby is OK.

Take care.

LA x

slowlyfading

Sending big ((HUGS)) your way. thinking of you and your OH. xx