Why do sellers lie for no reason?!?

mummybearx

I bought an item on 21st April, listing said postage within 8 days. No problem, I don't desperately need it, and I don't mind waiting.

Got an email from seller today saying they have posted item, sorry for the delay but their mother died at the weekend and ebay was the last thing on their mind.

Now, I looked at their recent feedback, people had bought things around the same time as me and the week/two weeks after me. They have left feedback saying 'quick delivery' etc etc. So I'm guessing the seller simply forgot about mine, maybe had too many deliveries/sales and mine got forgotten. But why email and say their mother died?? I'm guessing it was an 'excuse' as to why the postage was delayed, but as I said, I wasn't that bothered about the delays.

Is this just a ploy to get good feedback even with the slow delivey?

floss2

Maybe someone else had taken the others to the Post Office because the sellers mum HAD died? Give her the benefit of the doubt and don't be so quick to check if she's lying. I know that when my mum died, even though it was expected, I still forgot things up to several weeks later and yes, Ebay WAS the last thing on my mind at the time.

Riversong

They may have forgotten your parcel through grief? If they had indeed been to the post office after their berevement they may have simply not been thinking straight.

eBayRipOff

For some reason I do not think many would use such a "lie", not saying that some don't care, but there are so many other "lies" that could have been a good excuse too, that would have been much less extreme, and that probably would have satisfied you too!

There might have been a few glitches, impossible to judge in such situations, I might sometimes said a white lie due to some unforeseen reason, but I would never use a lie about death as an excuse, and I hope to think that most other people also would find that to distasteful as excuse to use!

Give them time, as long as you get your item eventually, you will never really know the truth.

mummybearx

As a rule, death is quite an extreme 'white lie', I agree on that. I don't generally think that ebay sellers are liars, but after reading numerous posts on here about lies/un-truths sellers tell (and buyers for that matter!) I thought that this is another one.

I should clear up, I looked at their other feedback last night, I was planning on messaging them myself today. That's when I noticed their sales seem to be carrying on as normal, only my one item hasn't been posted yet. I wasn't trying to 'catch them out' as it were.

Seller posted today, so should hopefully receive in the next few days x

hermum

I've had lots of buyers & sellers who haven't been able to either pay or post due to death, disease etc.
I've had a couple who even claimed their baby was in ICU & unlikely to survive.
Yet they were still active on their ebay account during their deathbed vigil.
Personally I would much rather they said, sorry I forgot to post-pay or whatever.

Gleeful

One seller I dealt with recently had been in a car crash. Apparently. It took 6 weeks for me to get my money back.

Another one didn't communicate with me at all throughout the whole transaction, eBay refunded me in the end.

I think I just prefer to be ignored than lied to, to be honest.

dasophster

hermum wrote: »

I've had lots of buyers & sellers who haven't been able to either pay or post due to death, disease etc.
I've had a couple who even claimed their baby was in ICU & unlikely to survive.
Yet they were still active on their ebay account during their deathbed vigil.
Personally I would much rather they said, sorry I forgot to post-pay or whatever.

I had that but it wasn't a seller but a buyer. She made all kinds of false claims about the item I sent her not being as described (when it was exactly as described and I could prove this) and postage charged, firstly she claimed that the postman ripped off the recorded delivery labels before throwing it in her garden, then the story changed, then it was 'oh my baby was in NICU so I got confused', having really had two babies who were in NICU and thankfully recovered I was not amused. xx

Crowqueen

hermum wrote: »

I've had lots of buyers & sellers who haven't been able to either pay or post due to death, disease etc.
I've had a couple who even claimed their baby was in ICU & unlikely to survive.
Yet they were still active on their ebay account during their deathbed vigil.
Personally I would much rather they said, sorry I forgot to post-pay or whatever.

This happened to me a number of years ago - I bought something from someone on the discussion boards, she suddenly disappeared, I wondered about it for a month but then I got a package with an apologetic note about her mother dying and of course I was happy to believe her and left her good, sympathetic feedback.

Honesty is its own reward.

I think if someone is genuinely bereaved or whatever, it's not easy to predict their motivations or priorities. Certainly, I wouldn't hold it against them - and that could be 'Sorry, I forgot to post your item because my mother has died' - which is fine, unless it so happens that you have been otherwise quite active - or you never know about it because keeping active on eBay is a way of coping with the death and you know you have a commitment to a complete stranger, at arm's length, who has paid you for something.

I would thus expect someone really in difficulties to stop dead, or continue selling - and I'd also expect them to be reasonably apologetic about it - because you are having to let someone else you have a commitment to down.

What is unreasonable is a brusque 'hey my mother died I have a right not to post your item at this sad time!' and then for them to carry on as normal.

I don't by any means think there is a wrong or right way to go about this while active on eBay - but I think someone genuinely in that situation would be polite about it. After all, you can't predict what someone might do if you have never been in the situation yourself - but it doesn't mean reasonably polite behaviour towards someone who has paid you for something goes out of the window.

You would, after all, be polite to your boss when you were asking him for a few personal days off work. eBay customers are your bosses too.

ads2608

zepsgal wrote: »

Got an email from seller today saying they have posted item, sorry for the delay but their mother died at the weekend and ebay was the last thing on their mind.

Was the seller's ID - Stephen_Ireland??

I would believe them otherwise.

mummybearx

Nope it wasnt him :-)