Would u say something??

Hollie84

Ok so our package includes 65 for the evening buffet so we have said we will pay for an extra 5 to make it 70,even though we have around 80 guests.Some of the day guests probably wont be massively hungry and there is about 20kids and u know what kids are like.so anyway we invited my neighbour,his wife and there two kids 16 and 23.my neighbour mentioned the wedding a few weeks back and mentioned that all of them will be coming more than likely and he will probably hire a 7 seater,by all i mean there kids partners,i barely know them met them twice and ive said to OH TBH im a bit peeved they have presumed there kids partners can come,so mentioned to OH should we say something that we are on a tight budget and havent catered for the extra 2?? yes i know its 2 people but like i say we wasnt asked,there was only the 4 names on the invite and i dont know them.i thought about saying if they want them to come can they pay for them but i dont know if that sounds really cheeky.we havent got people at our wedidng that we dont know.

Stephb1986_2

I would say that the invite was for only them and their kids and sorry for the confusion.

Good luck

Steph xx

VfM4meplse

Hollie84 wrote: »

there was only the 4 names on the invite

This is the key - it's really rude of your neighbours to deliberately ignore it! I think you should make your position clear to them, say it's about your budget and you hope you haven't caused offence but would feel dreadful if they went to the expense of hiring a 7-seater!

Let them make the choice after that, but bear in mind you probably won't see any of them there and it will sour your relationship with them.

LEJC

If you want a way round it Its not so much the catering budget that you need to focus on...as you say people dont always want to eat...

but what you should be looking into if you are going to exceed the numbers set by the venue are the fire regulations....basically if your venue can hold a maximum of 70 then to invite more could put them in breech of regulations.

With that in mind and if your venue is strict about regulations then you could find them turning away guests you want at the wedding at the expense of partners of children of others.

I would check with your venue regarding numbers and make the decision to tell these "presumed invited guests" that the reason they may not be able to attend is because of a limit on space rather than them not being wanted there....

horsechestnut

Definately go with the restricted nembers for Health & Safety reasons.

Hollie84

Thank you for replies,limit on space is a very good idea.i know the room fits upto 100 people but we dont want it so people are crammed into a room and claustrophobic,i like space lol

Hollie84

VfM4meplse wrote: »

This is the key - it's really rude of your neighbours to deliberately ignore it! I think you should make your position clear to them, say it's about your budget and you hope you haven't caused offence but would feel dreadful if they went to the expense of hiring a 7-seater!

Let them make the choice after that, but bear in mind you probably won't see any of them there and it will sour your relationship with them.

Funny thing is its not the first time it happened,when we first told them the wedding was booked they said o what date etc i said friday the 10th,o right well i dont think we can make the day so just put us down for the evening :eek: i said u was only coming to the evening do anyway as we are having a very small intimate day :rotfl:

Maysie

Not everyone turns up on the day. We were 5 short and had massives of food left over. As nice as the pork roast was we ate it for 3 days after (rolls, curried and bbq casseroled sauce. If they are just to the evening i would not even worry about them. You would probably just be focusing on enjoying yourselfs and talking to your nearest and dearest anyway. Thinking about it mums friend came with her husband and son and his girlfriend who i had never met.

You are talking about only 2 extra in the end and you have over catered for anyway. Don't they say to only cater for 3/4? I am sure i have seen that on here somewhere. So you tell neighbours they got it wrong. It creates bad feeling a they don't' come at all or b they come and perhaps is loads of food left over. Yes its damm rude of them to assume you won't mind. But its only 2 people in the evening. If it was daytime i would be horrified.

wanchai_2

If it's only in the evening, let it go.

VERY rude of them though!!!

Maysie - 5 people just didn't turn up??? I would be horrified if anyone did that to us without letting us know - even the day before the wedding, they could at least call! :eek:

YoungBaker

I agree I would personally leave it. It depends how close you are to them as if you don't extend the invite and allow the partners kids to come - maybe they have them that weekend and won't be able to come or something? So it all depends whether you want that scenario to happen...

I personally would just put it down to experience, as ultimately 2 extra kids isn't really going to make too much of a massive difference -they'll just play with the other kids and are hardly gonna make it so full people can't move. And as you say, you know what kids are like so it's unlikely they'll be mauling the buffet either!

I do get what you mean though and a lot of it is the principal of it, but to keep piece and allow my friends to see me I would just let it slide...

wanchai_2

They're not kids Allan - they're partners of their grown up kids (well, 16 and 23)!