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Misunderstanding? Or just me worrying about nothing!
CKhalvashi
Posts: 12,134 Forumite
I’m going to keep this as short and sweet as possible.
Had HSBC Premier on the phone earlier regarding a payment.
They’ve taken through security, I’ve verified who they are by asking details of 2 payments and they’ve lovingly asked whether I know who ‘Capital Prestige’ is.
At this point, I’ve asked them if they can speak to the wife, to which they’ve replied ‘But there’s a Miss T*******idze on the account, not a Mrs K’. Their internal markers also apparently show us ‘living together’ and not married. We are not married, neither of us ever have been, but we’ve lived together for the last 11 years (and have 2 children), so I do consider us ‘as good as’ married.
They’ve quickly ended the call at this point, after asking us to go into branch ‘at our convenience’ to discuss the problem. They’ve also blocked OH’s debit/credit card (although mine still works). They’ve also refused to speak with our Commercial/Premier manager, who would both tell them (both personal and business are joint) that I refer to her as such.
My main concern is whether anything will be flagged as a result of this, as I’m in the process of remortgaging 2 BTL’s at the moment (with HSBC, needless to say!)
CK
Had HSBC Premier on the phone earlier regarding a payment.
They’ve taken through security, I’ve verified who they are by asking details of 2 payments and they’ve lovingly asked whether I know who ‘Capital Prestige’ is.
At this point, I’ve asked them if they can speak to the wife, to which they’ve replied ‘But there’s a Miss T*******idze on the account, not a Mrs K’. Their internal markers also apparently show us ‘living together’ and not married. We are not married, neither of us ever have been, but we’ve lived together for the last 11 years (and have 2 children), so I do consider us ‘as good as’ married.
They’ve quickly ended the call at this point, after asking us to go into branch ‘at our convenience’ to discuss the problem. They’ve also blocked OH’s debit/credit card (although mine still works). They’ve also refused to speak with our Commercial/Premier manager, who would both tell them (both personal and business are joint) that I refer to her as such.
My main concern is whether anything will be flagged as a result of this, as I’m in the process of remortgaging 2 BTL’s at the moment (with HSBC, needless to say!)
CK
💙💛 💔
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Comments
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CKhalvashi wrote: »......., so I do consider us ‘as good as’ married..........
your problem is that in the parallel universe of the real world, nobody else does.
I'm not sure whether you've misled the bank or yourself, but you probably would do well to pop into the bank together, apologise for the confusion and ask them how you should best arrange things so it works how you want.The questions that get the best answers are the questions that give most detail....0 -
your problem is that in the parallel universe of the real world, nobody else does.
I'm not sure whether you've misled the bank or yourself, but you probably would do well to pop into the bank together, apologise for the confusion and ask them how you should best arrange things so it works how you want.
Point taken. OH has always been known as ‘Mrs K’ for things like school (as most teachers do when speaking to parents), and it’s well known within the main part of our business (as in the part that we run together) that we have been together for a long time. The other shareholder on one of our bits (we’re 50/50 on a Holding company, which owns bits/all of a further 11 companies) refers to his wife as ‘OH’, which IMO is just as bad.
CK will be quiet, go to bed and sort it out tomorrow.💙💛 💔0 -
I'd be hopping mad about the stopped card and the hassle, because nothing seems to be wrong here. It's not like your "wife" has a false name on her debit card.
In any case, it makes no difference if you were married. It's not a legal requirement for women to change their names, and many don't. Nor is it a legal requirement that they don't call themselves Miss if they want to. Marital status affects nothing and is a question they ought not to be even asking."It will take, five, 10, 15 years to get back to where we need to be. But it's no longer the individual banks that are in the wrong, it's the banking industry as a whole." - Steven Cooper, head of personal and business banking at Barclays, talking to Martin Lewis0 -
I'd be hopping mad about the stopped card and the hassle, because nothing seems to be wrong here. It's not like your "wife" has a false name on her debit card.
In any case, it makes no difference if you were married. It's not a legal requirement for women to change their names, and many don't. Nor is it a legal requirement that they don't call themselves Miss if they want to. Marital status affects nothing and is a question they ought not to be even asking.
all very well, but if you take that attitude into the bank with you, the likely outcome is you'll just get up the nose of the person who is best placed to help you; why risk making it more difficult than it need be to sort out?The questions that get the best answers are the questions that give most detail....0 -
Is this a joint account? If not, they are unalble to talk to a even the married partner about an individual's account.0
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CKhalvashi wrote: »........to which they’ve replied ‘But there’s a Miss T*******idze on the account, .......
I think that tells us it's a joint account doesn't it?The questions that get the best answers are the questions that give most detail....0 -
In any case, it makes no difference if you were married .
Personally I still wouldn't try to claim to a bank that I was married if I wasn't, just because "we've been together so long that it pretty much counts as such" - because it doesn't, in a legal sense.It's not a legal requirement for women to change their names, and many don't. Nor is it a legal requirement that they don't call themselves Miss if they want to. Marital status affects nothing and is a question they ought not to be even asking.
Clearly. I've always been Ms since childhood, and my OH and I both doubled up our names (so, known as Ms Smith-Jones and Mr Smith-Jones for legal stuff). But to claim you're married on a bank account is kind of asking for trouble - surely this might affect risk scores and demographic-based marketing and stuff like that? You might think whether an account holder is married or not doesn't matter, but it will to the bank for perfectly logical reasons.
I certainly don't think the OP has any right to have a !!!!!! attitude with HSBC for wanting to correct the information on his account.
The thread title is also misleading. This isn't a misunderstanding, the OP has provided false information and then got angry when HSBC staff queried it. Stopping cards is going a bit far, but it still doesn't mean the OP is innocent in all this.CKhalvashi wrote: »They’ve also refused to speak with our Commercial/Premier manager, who would both tell them (both personal and business are joint) that I refer to her as such.
I also don't understand why this would matter a jot. She's *not* your wife. Whatever you refer to her as in the presence of bank staff doesn't result in a legal status change from unmarried > married. Only a, you know, marriage ceremony/certificate/etc can do that.
If you're not fussed about a wedding but want the legal status of marriage (and all the legal benefits it brings, such as next of kinship, inheritence stuff), go down to the registry office in a t-shirt and jeans and sign a form.0 -
The way I read it, nobody's made any false claim to be married and there isn't any incorrect information on the account.I certainly don't think the OP has any right to have a !!!!!! attitude with HSBC for wanting to correct the information on his account."It will take, five, 10, 15 years to get back to where we need to be. But it's no longer the individual banks that are in the wrong, it's the banking industry as a whole." - Steven Cooper, head of personal and business banking at Barclays, talking to Martin Lewis0 -
Personally I still wouldn't try to claim to a bank that I was married if I wasn't, j.......
think you're reading this wrong; OP didn't try to claim he was married but simply referred to his partner as 'wife' more-or-less as a familiar term, regard it as a slip of the tongue.
And nowhere is there mention that he 'has a !!!!!! attitude with HSBC' - in fact the tone is very even. No need to make a drama out of a simple misunderstanding, hence my post #2.The questions that get the best answers are the questions that give most detail....0 -
think you're reading this wrong; OP didn't try to claim he was married but simply referred to his partner as 'wife' more-or-less as a familiar term, regard it as a slip of the tongue.
And nowhere is there mention that he 'has a !!!!!! attitude with HSBC' - in fact the tone is very even. No need to make a drama out of a simple misunderstanding, hence my post #2.
Same here, I thought it was just that the OP said 'you'll have to ask the wife about that one' and the person on the phone freaked out and blocked the card.......?
If that is correct then I think maybe that is a slight over reaction by the bank I've been referred to as the OH's 'Mrs' ever since we got together and we don't even live together, it's just a figure of speech isn't it??0
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