NEW! My son went to Prison today, I'm sad, but glad

robster1964

Guys, I am going to check out for tonight.. I have a feeling Dylan is going to assassinate me?
Apparrentlly, I can. Send stuff to my boy... I just want to say I will be sending him the best of things!

robster1964

One other thing is most of his family have saidj they will not visit him? That makes me sad again xj

con1888

Does the first thread still exist?

I am wondering why 'DylanO' is glad he is locked up, does he know you personally?

con1888

Why won't the rest of your family visit?
Has he done something to upset them badly?

If so then I can understand that I guess and it may take time if they EVER come round.

There_Goes_Trouble

robster1964 wrote: »

I am sick, that my boy has come to this....
I think it may be about me, but I don't know what I wrong?
He doesn't like me either, and blames me for his failures?
Thanks for listening x
Robster x

You blame yourself.
He blames you.

BUT... he is an adult. He makes his own decisions. No one forced him to break the law, he can change his behaviour IF HE WANTS TO.

Did it occur to you that maybe you did nothing wrong? That he is the way he is because that's the path he chose? You have 4 other children who did not turn to crime so you can't have got it that wrong.

He has to take responsibility for his own actions. It's his life, his choice of lifestyle.

Stop blaming yourself and stop allowing him to blame you. You're not making him take responsibility for himself and while he's got the "it's Mum's fault" excuse he's never going to change. He can do what he likes and it will all be your fault. You are enabling him to continue his lifestyle because you allow him to blame you and you continue to support him.

ikkle87

Can I ask, have you ever been the victim of a crime? Ever been burgalled, mugged, assaulted etc?

robster1964

There_Goes_Trouble wrote: »

You blame yourself.
He blames you.

BUT... he is an adult. He makes his own decisions. No one forced him to break the law, he can change his behaviour IF HE WANTS TO.

Did it occur to you that maybe you did nothing wrong? That he is the way he is because that's the path he chose? You have 4 other children who did not turn to crime so you can't have got it that wrong.

He has to take responsibility for his own actions. It's his life, his choice of lifestyle.

Stop blaming yourself and stop allowing him to blame you. You're not making him take responsibility for himself and while he's got the "it's Mum's fault" excuse he's never going to change. He can do what he likes and it will all be your fault.

It's hard when it's one of your kids!
When they make their own choiches,
But I think you might be right with that statement?
Thinking about it x thanks x

DylanO

robster1964 wrote: »

I am sorry if I appear to act like that, I am glad that he's locked up too.. He has got problems...
But I can't leave him on his own...
Is it wrong, to say, that I will always stand by him?
Most of the family have already said they can't be bothered with him... But I can't do that...

Robster x

You're not leaving him on his own - you'll always be there for him, when he chooses to cease being a criminal. By being there for him while he's a criminal he has no need to stop.

If you don't do everything you can to stop him, by letting him hit rock bottom - then when he hurts, or kills someone's grandmother and destroys a family - you will be partly responsible.

Will you be able to look at a family robbed of their grandmother in the most brutal way and spout some of the crap you've spouted on here?

DylanO

robster1964 wrote: »

Guys, I am going to check out for tonight.. I have a feeling Dylan is going to assassinate me?
Apparrentlly, I can. Send stuff to my boy... I just want to say I will be sending him the best of things!

Oh for crying out loud!

DylanO

robster1964 wrote: »

A bit of background, I have 5 kids. We have had a fabulous life... My boy is the youngest, and thinks for some reason he has lost out? I truly don't know why?

They're all drug users - that's not a fabulous life.