Move back in with parents to save deposit??



  • Am I missing the point? Are you suggesting that you are going to live RENT FREE with your family at your parents' home? Why should 2 adults who are earning expect to live with their children at their parents' home FOR NOTHING??? Do you really think your parents should put you all up in their house for free? Are they going to feed and clothe you as well? I'm amazed that everyone seems to think this is OK. If your parents are happy to go along with it, more fool them - have you actually asked them about this plan?

    Call me old-fashioned, but I think people who are old enough to start a family should be able to stand on their own two feet and not expect to sponge off their parents.

    You have a very valid point- we have discussed this with my folks and they are ok with it. We would be making a contribution every month (£400) which has been agreed but thats more than a token rather than a reflection of the cost of taking us on- we are aware and grateful of my parents generosity in trying to help us get a strong base.

    After all, a small token parent to my folks is better than paying off some strangers mortgage!
  • Dave_HamDave_Ham Forumite
    6K Posts
    Tenth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    I honestly think most of you lot are taking yourself way to seriously, or are just crackers..

    The OP has been very diplomatic as they have posted and between a few "you should save more than that" posts and a couple of "you can do better" we then get a "don't sponge off your parents" Firstly can we all say our posts were helpful and Windsor castle, I would fancy Christmas Dinner at yours - bring your own crackers (quite literally)

    Just to add some perspective, I think there are always ways in we can tighten our belts and the other forum is a great support BUT

    £17.5k each before tax.

    So say after tax and work travelling costs the OP and partner probably take home £1k each.

    With rent at £900 and associated council tax, utilities and phone/broadband they have got to be looking at another £300. With food shopping for 4 say £200 and I am being liberal already at £1400 outgoings without trying.

    Add in nappies and milk (age dependent), children clothes, car tax, car insurance, contents insurance and TV license forgetting life insurance or dare I say private health and maybe 1 family outing a month...

    ..... where on earth are you crazies getting save all this money from ????

    OP - good call using parents, stick to your guns, good advice on fixing a date and amount and make it happen.

    Rest of you - get of their back...
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  • Dave_Ham wrote: »
    unparalelled wisdom..

    Thanks you- really, thank you for your understanding! You pretty much have our outgoings pegged apart from that fancy healthcare or life insurance lol

    We are really keen to get this going and I do have half a mind to give monthly updates of our progress along with maybe a diary of our current mental health!!

    Really appreciate all the input and look forward to hearing from others who have done this or are considering this- oh how we wish we had taken the plunge in the good ol days of 110% mortgages lol;)
  • getmore4lessgetmore4less Forumite
    46.2K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper I've helped Parliament
    do a soa and post

    Use the last 12months as the basis for current income/outgoings.

    Then do a 5 year plan with a savings goal.

    Challenge every spend you have and prioritise.

    one area is PC's
    A £200 PC will do for more than 5 years unless you need top end for work.
    you probably have enough kit to not need to spend anything in this area for 5 years.
  • getmore4lessgetmore4less Forumite
    46.2K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper I've helped Parliament
    I think some are a bit ambitious on there savings estimate for a family of 4.

    £35k net £2100-£2340pm + benifits.
  • I think people are forgetting the most valuable money saving element here. Grandparents on hand to babysit! ;)

    OP - You seem to be going into this with good sensible reasons so I'm sure you will be able to manage to save. Good luck
  • edited 18 March 2012 at 10:07AM
    BrallaqueenBrallaqueen Forumite
    1.4K Posts
    edited 18 March 2012 at 10:07AM

    We are really keen to get this going and I do have half a mind to give monthly updates of our progress along with maybe a diary of our current mental health!!

    Please do this! There are some personal savings logs on the savings board and they are really inspirational for readers, and the OPs find it helpful too.

    Living with parents can be really trying but, depending on how well you get on with m&d, your children could really benefit from a close relationship with grandparents.

    Needs careful thought though - how big is m&d's house? There needs to be space enough for all of you without feeling on top of one another.

    Would you/could you leave some parts of it 'exclusive' so your parents can have their privacy when needed and not feel overrun?

    Anecdata - at one point myself, my brother & GF were living with my mum in her 'one and a half bed' bungalow. I slept on a camp bed in the attic space, brother and GF in the single room and my mum kept her bedroom.
    Emergency savings: 4600
    0% Credit card: 1965.00
  • SuarezSuarez Forumite
    970 Posts
    Can you not look for a cheaper rent just for now where you can change your elec/gas suppliers etc. Could save you an extra few hundred month.
  • I hope it all works out for you :beer: it will be so worth it in the end.

    Me and my partner will be on a similar wage to yourselves ( I start my new job soon ) with 2 children under the age of 6 and we would love the opportunity to move in with my parents while we save but my parents are on benefits now so we´d have to pay their rent etc which is the same amount as ours in the house we live in now.

    If you have the opportunity to move in with parents and they are ok with it I say go for it :)

    Let us know how it goes if you decide to.
    :j Comping wins: Gig tickets, Lovemydog tag, Country Livings Christmas fair tickets

    Freebies: Redken hair product, Cow teddy, Pebble grey illuminated compact mirror.
  • You can only guess at how it might work - why don't you suggest a months trial period at your parents' house before you make the decision and leave your place - it won't be exactly the same as properly living there with no 'safety net' of moving out, but it should give you a good idea as to whether it will end up as family-cide!

    BUT you must all agree to be honest about it all, there's no good being all 'British' and polite about it, and then it all exploding in the future. Grown-up discussions can be hard but it does ease the way. Maybe suggest a family meeting every month to ensure that nothing gets left until it explodes.
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