finding it difficult to disipline a well behaved child

angelil

I don't know how you handle it (I'll ask my mum for you if you like ) but my sister and I were exactly the same. I was the elder by three years and you had to constantly tell me to stop doing something before I got the message ("getting the message" usually came in the form of a smack eventually as I just wouldn't listen ). My younger sister, however, was soooooo sensitive - you only had to look at her to let her know she was in trouble and she'd almost be in tears there and then. Just to reassure you that your pair are not the first or last in this regard xx

paidinchickens

bigmomma051204 wrote: »

LOL - wish i got paid in chickens, if it means i could live on Prada Hill... Hell, even if i just live in the next street down (Gucci Close or Chanel Lane) i'll be happy! :beer:

would lurrrrrrrv to have you round these parts as my current neighbours are rather stuck up and think we are slightly bonkers for our money saving ways another MSE buddy would be fab plus I could use a [STRIKE]victim[/STRIKE] willing volunteer to try my thrifty home made wine :D:D

ruby-roo_2

A good way to reprimand a child is to talk through with them about what you disaprove of. Make it very clear that you are upset or disappointed by the behaviour and not with the child themself. Talk quietly, so that they really have to listen to you to hear what you are saying, and keep eye contact with them. By starting a discussion in this way there is nothing for them to feel worried about, so no reason for them to feel upset or clam up and refuse to discuss things with you.

Help them see why doing or saying something is not a good idea, discuss the effects of what they have done on themselves and others. Ask them to tell you whether what they did or said was a good choice. If they agree with you that it was not a good choice, encourage them to say what would be a better choice.

Bit by bit they will realise the error of their ways and will have come to their own conclusions about how better to handle a situation in future. So a good choice over how to react will be more deeply inbedded in their mindset.

Of course this will not work with every child and works better with older children. It can be very effective though and encourages children to take those first steps towards reasoned thought and self discipline.

SmallL

I think my parents had the same problem with me, i was very well behaved but when i did get told off by my parents i was shocked and usually went to my room and cried.
I think i wanted to be told WHY it was wrong and for them to listen to my reasoning for acting that way rather than just being told 'You stupid child' . I also think it was due to that wording as to why i was so upset when i did get told off.
Once i got told off for not letting my parents help me pack to go on holiday with my boyfriend (i was 17) They threatened to stop me going because i wanted to pack myself :rotfl:

HelenYorkshire

I was the kid who cried in class if there was a general "someone's flooded the toilets"-type telling off. (Primary school, I hasten to add!)

Um not sure what advice to give, I still hate confrontation and would probably burst into tears if my boss yelled at me :eek:
I tend to get around it by asking for help before I completely make a mess of something

I would go with the "you did something wrong, here's why it's wrong", a spoken explanation, rather than a "WHAT THE HECK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!?" b*ll*cking.