Stopping son from borrowing money

Tremour-88

Valli wrote: »

UNLESS he/she is living in your home! Your house = your rules.

Since when does finance, credit cards etc. effect a home or rules?

The son is an adult and treating them like a child by threatening them or talking down to them like a kid is only going to make things worse.

If he insists on doing it, let him. You have to learn from your mistakes.

paddyrg

You can't stop him, but you can advise. It will be a self-limiting condition soon enough, if someone is stupid enough to lend £2000 to someone with no income, they're fools, it will end in tears, but your son's credit record will get hosed, preventing more borrowing.

But if he feels he can afford loan repayments, he can pay towards rent and housekeeping instead.

rdchick

I'm sure the OP doesn't want bailiffs banging on their front door when their son can't pay back what he owes so definitely their house=their rules

I also wish I told my parents before borrowing anything, I have just 'come out' to my parents that I owe £8k they are devastated, I'm 23 but I don't live with them... Would have been a different story if I had.

Yes the son is an adult but the OP is still their parent and can and should give advice to give them the whole picture, let's face it to a 19 year old the adverts for a payday loans where they show you using the money for holidays and such likes is pretty tempting but make sure they know the full picture.

Find that thread of the kid who's parents are threatening to throw him aout because he took out a couple of payday loans...

zzzLazyDaisy

The interest on payday loans is seriously scary. They are very much short term loans, if you don't pay them off when you are supposed to, the debt runs out of control before your eyes. Is it possible that he is trying to get a £2000 loan to pay off the payday loans?

Yes, he needs to stop borrowing money, but at this stage he probably also needs help to get on top of his current borrowing because although he may legally be an adult, he is still a vulnerable young man, with little life experience.

Is it possible to sit down with him and find out exactly what he owes and work out a way to sort this mess out before it overwhelms him? For example, is it possible for you to repay the payday loan and for him to repay you? It would stop the interest running and help him to get control of things. I would only suggest this, though, if this is the first time this has happened and there is no previous history of bailing him out. And of course if your situation is such that you can afford to take the risk that he may not pay you back. Only you know if this is a serious risk and if you are willing/able to take the risk.

Alternatively help him to make an appointment at the CAB and get some independent advice for him.

WhiteHorse

Infoseeking wrote: »

Can anyone give me any advice on how to stop my 19 year old son from borrowing money from payday loan companies? He has no means of paying back and lives in my house.

Simple. He lives in your house.

He will default and then you will be plunged into a nightmare of visits from bailiffs and DCA goons.

If he wants to destroy himself, fine. But he has no right to involve you. Inform him that if he intends to go ahead, you will throw him out.

SailorSam

If he's not going to listen to your advice, and he isn't able to keep up the payments he'll end up in big trouble and there's little you can do. We all learn from our mistakes.
On the bright side at least the debt remains his if he's only borrowing from PayDay loans, if he started going to one of these illegal money lenders they come around with threats to the rest of the family.

whatmichaelsays

Valli wrote: »

UNLESS he/she is living in your home! Your house = your rules.

Disagree. How does that sort of attitude encourage young people to go out, make their own choices in life and be independent?

Once I have kids reach the age of 18, they're free to make whatever decisions they choose - and they'll live with the consequences of them.

WhiteHorse

whatmichaelsays wrote: »

Disagree. How does that sort of attitude encourage young people to go out, make their own choices in life and be independent?

And what sort of message is 'you can do what you want regardless of the consequences for other people' ?

Decluttering

I think you would earn more respect if you sat him down and expressed your concerns about his application. The adverts make the process sound so quick and easy and there's little thought as to how much has to be paid back or where the money to pay back will come from. If you ban him from borrowing without explaining why you will just sound like a killjoy, it would be better to explain that while you can't stop him, you strongly advise that it isn't as good an idea as it sounds on TV.

It might also help to establish why he wants the money and suggest other ways of how he could earn it / cheaper alternatives.

zzzLazyDaisy

As the OP was a first (and only) post by a newbie who hasn't come back, it is probably safe to say that we are chatting among ourselves here