Church marriage class, what should we expect?

Xaniwoop

mine was a fairly basic chat about our attitudes to money/children etc. Thankfully we didn't have to talk about sex at all as our vicar knew us quite well and was a bit embarrassed by that idea (he did ask if we had a married couple in church we could talk to about that - erm it's ok I'm sure we'll figure it out given we are already living together...)

The course my current church offers is brilliant though. Its called 'the marriage course' and the programme is run in lots of different churches. There is a book that goes with it ('the marriage book') that I would highly recommend. Lots of practical advice on marriage eg communication, conflict, how people show love, how to forgive, dealing with the inlaws. It has a Christian basis but isn't about converting you just helping you build a strong foundation for married life.

Seanymph

we had three I think - I don't know, I only went to one and then my husband-to-be went to the next two alone because I refused to go. I have no idea what lies he told to the vicar to explain my absence.

I could have told him - in the first session the vicar told me 'never to assert my will above my husbands'. Really?

When challenged he said that my husband's role was to 'lay down his life for me if necessary'.

I figured there would be a lot less opportunity for him to lay down his life than for me to have to give in over something and spent the rest of the session so cross that I can't remember any of it. I also refused to go back.

'Never exert your will over his' - how would that ever work?

*we lived together for four months before he moved out, the divorce took longer than that to come through *

anon123456

We had ours on sunday and it was actually very enjoyable 22 couples at ours. Like above have said they talked about if you were on the same page as your partner in key life issues. Careers / Family / Money / Beliefs and if not on the same page had you at least discussed them and understood the others view.

Then they discussed the languages of love which is how your partner best expresses and likes to receive love. Gifts / Acts of Service / Touch / Words of Affirmation / the other one i forgot

Highly recommend it!!

Gloomendoom

Gingham_R wrote: »

Seriously? :rotfl: Thank goodness our lessons didn't go down that path. I'd have been in stitches.

I was! It didn't help that the vicar is a friend of ours.

To be honest, it was probably quite a small part of the whole course. It is just that it stands out in my mind. I do feel that the subject of children could have done with a bit more attention though.

Perhaps some sort of pre marriage training course should be compulsory before for all weddings, not just those in a church.

sassyblue

Emmarillo wrote: »

Ours was hilarious. We were with one other couple (the lady was heavily pregnant). Mens and womens differing sexual needs were explained by a man being like a kettle and a woman like a toaster- the kettle heats up faster, but if you put them on at the same time, they tend to boil and pop up at the same time. It was very hard to keep a straight face.

I've read it all now... :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

System

ianbar0 wrote: »

We are getting married in may in our local church of England church. Part of doing this we have to go to some marriage class on Saturday, run by a local vicar. Has anyone been to one before? Thank you

If you don't get a grade C or above in the exam at the end you will only be allowed to get married in the vestry.
If you get an A* you can upgrade to the local cathedral.

DVardysShadow

Seanymph wrote: »

we had three I think - I don't know, I only went to one and then my husband-to-be went to the next two alone because I refused to go. I have no idea what lies he told to the vicar to explain my absence.

I could have told him - in the first session the vicar told me 'never to assert my will above my husbands'. Really?

*we lived together for four months before he moved out, the divorce took longer than that to come through *

Didn't the fact that the 2 of you did not see eye to eye about whether or not to attend actually tell you something ???? Either you both go, or you both don't?

If I was the priest, I would not have conducted the marriage as much for him going to the class when you didn't as the other way about - I would have felt far happier if you had both skipped the marriage class.