HELP 2 babies in 14 mnths now cant return to work what can i claim ?

merlot123

What we need to see is a breakdown of your bills etc and your OH income and any benefits you are currently receiving, that way we can make suggestions etc on how to reduce your spending and increase your income.

It's not as though the two of them have never worked and the OP is expecting her 12th child, is it?

Some of you are the most judgemental people I have ever come across, the OP is expecting a second baby, maybe not planned and ask if she is entitled to anything from the state, what is wrong with that?, child benefit is a universal benefit at this moment in time and some tax credits are too upto a income limit of £66K (I think), of course she is entitled to them as some of you are.


merlot123

kingfisherblue

Congratulations on your pregnancy. I hope all goes well for you. Having children close together is hard at first, but does get easier as they get older.

Many teachers on maternity leave return to work for a week or so before the summer holidays, so that they get paid for the six week break. Also, as someone else has pointed out, you may have to pay back some maternity pay if you don't go back for a three month period - but this is only if you received additional maternity pay from your employer. SMP does not have to be paid back. If you have received additional maternity pay, you may want to consider returning to work after the Easter or May holidays and putting your child in nursery or with a child minder for a few weeks.

mishkanorman

ViolaLass wrote: »

I'm pleased you're pleased that you're pregnant but the bit I've highlighted is nonsense. You're pregnant for no better or more spiritual a reason than you had unprotected sex.

its clearly what the OP believes, if you dont then thats up to you but why feel the need to call it nonsense !?!

ViolaLass

mishkanorman wrote: »

its clearly what the OP believes, if you dont then thats up to you but why feel the need to call it nonsense !?!

Because it is and because I don't think the OP feeling like the baby has been imposed on her by someone else is helpful. She needs to feel that she can deal with it as she wants to, not as she thinks someone else wants her to.

Nicki

ViolaLass wrote: »

Because it is and because I don't think the OP feeling like the baby has been imposed on her by someone else is helpful. She needs to feel that she can deal with it as she wants to, not as she thinks someone else wants her to.

That is very clearly NOT what OP thinks and your very abrupt post is quite offensive.

OP has said that she took a long time to conceive her first child, and had stopped using contraception because she assumed that it would take a similarly long time to conceive her second, when you added into the equation that she is also breastfeeding which suppresses fertility. The fact that she has conceived easily and quickly this time has come as a surprise, hasn't been completely factored in financially, but is a blessing and the child is not unplanned, just early.

OP - I had a similar story. Fertility treatment for 6 years, then fell pregnant 4 months later whilst fully breastfeeding the first, and still on maternity leave. We'd been advised that breastfeeding would be adequate contraception, and the best way to manage our fertility if we wanted more than one child. That turned out to be at least half true! We have always regarded that second child, born 13 months after the first, as a blessing and miracle too.

Ignore the nastiness, the financial stuff can and will be sorted and you've already had some good advice on here. I would just caution, as someone else has already said, that you shouldn't make any hard and fast decisions in relation to giving up your job at least until you have had your 12 week scan and know that all is progressing well.

mishkanorman

ViolaLass wrote: »

Because it is and because I don't think the OP feeling like the baby has been imposed on her by someone else is helpful. She needs to feel that she can deal with it as she wants to, not as she thinks someone else wants her to.

its nonsense to you

The OP has clearly expressed how much a baby is wanted, and as such would never be 'imposed' and actually in those circumstances I think its probably of great support to have faith that some things are just meant to be.

Tippytoes

It's a bit late for comments about should have used contraception. Work opposite "shifts" to your husband. It's what we had to do back in the dark ages before benefits were dished out like confetti.

There's always a way round things, but sometimes you have to self-help rather than rely on the system to bail you out.

lizzywig

Since so many people are so quick to criticise OP for not using contraception I just wanted to share my story.

My DD is 12 weeks old, after she was born I went to the doctors to arrange contraception. My doctor asked if I was breastfeeding and I said yes, he said that I did not need contraception as breastfeeding is a natural contraceptive. So I went away but then started thinking that it was a pretty big gamble to take. I looked it up online and it's true, it is, because breastfeeding (usually) stops your periods. However it's not 100% effective (the doctor didn't tell me this) so I went to see another doctor who told me the same. I had to be really persistant to be taken seriously and to actually be given anything.

My point being that OP was breastfeeding and if (and I'm not saying she was) she was under the impression that many women are that you can't get pregnant when breastfeeding, then she would not have known that she would fall pregnant.

OP - I can't answer your questions I'm afraid but congratulations. My advice is that if you want something enough then you can usually make it work - try to think laterally. Work out what you're entitled to (and don't feel bad about it, you've paid into the system) and also think about using some of your 'free working days'. I can't remember what they're officially called but when you're on mat leave you're allowed to work x number of days, I think it's 5 or 7, get paid for it and also get your maternity pay - completely legal. So maybe you could find a bit of casual work on some days when your OH is around to look after the baby you have now (before you get too pregnant). Have you also thought about working in a nursery? You would get a discount off of childcare. Alternatively I have a friend who upon having two children didn't know what to do because she also couldn't afford to return to work, so she became a registered childminder. She can look after her own children and others at the same time and make more money than she would than by going back to work. Just a thought...

looby75

zzzLazyDaisy wrote: »

Congratulations OP! My beautiful G'daughters are 11 months apart. DGD1 was planned. GDG2 was conceived while her mum was on the pill. DGD3 was conceived one year later when her (somewhat paranoid!) parents were using both depo injections and condoms! Some things are just meant to be!

I am very sorry about the negative comments that you have received. The simple fact is that child benefit and child tax credits are there for everyone. At 37 you don't have all the time in the world to have more children. You will manage, and things will work out.

Good luck!

Dx

you can say that again! My sisters youngest 3 are all under 4 and there is only 10 months between the last 2. The first was planned and was supposed to be her last (4th child) she went on the pill and then she found out she was expecting no 5, then she had the implant fitted because she was determined no more.

Then 7 months later she went off coffee which always happend with her other pg's, so to put her mind at rest she took a test which came back positive. She went for a dating scan and found out she was 30 weeks pg :eek: no 6 was born 6 weeks later! In total she knew she was expecting for a total of 7 weeks.

OP I know you are in shock but you will manage, as for childcare some nurseries will discount fees for a second child. My sister (a different one from the one above) used to get a 25% discount on the fees for her second child, not all nurseries do it but it's worth asking around to see if it would make returning to work more affordable.

jellyhead

As a lazy mare I'd just like to add ... if having 2 young children means you don't feel up to working for a couple of years that's fine - don't feel guilty just because some people on here think you shouldn't get tax credits for sitting on your backside.