Primary school putting kids "in the naughty corner" if they need the toilet

Sparklyfairy

themull1 wrote: »

My daughter who is 12 had just started her first period, when she felt it leaking during class, the teacher wouldnt let her go to the loo, i blasted the headteacher, and they have changed the school policy to allow kids to use the loo during class if necessary. its the same at the end of the day, the kids havent got time to use the loo before the school buses leave which is ridiculous.

:T:T:T:T:T Well done, you! x

Gingham_R

Nicki wrote: »

I can't see how asking a 6 year old to think about whether they need the toilet at break time, and learn to take responsibility for doing so without being reminded, is any different from asking a toddler whether he needs to go before you leave the house, as most of us do as a matter of course..

I don't think anyone has issue with reminding children and encouraging them to take responsibility without being reminded.

That's not what's happening though, is it?

And the head?! I think this is an ofsted matter, personally.

themull1

Ive seen bus drivers park up for a wee - so it does happen!

meritaten

Nicki wrote: »

I know I am in the minority but your last post sparky faerie has confirmed what I strongly suspected was happening, and I still dont find it all that disturbing.

The kids are being told to go to the toilet during their break or lunchtime. If they come back into class and ask within a very short period of time (you've said maximum 20 mins) they clearly have ignored or forgotten this request, and they either wait for the next break or go but are being punished to reinforce that this is the rule. If they ask after a longer period of time, I assume they are asked if they can wait and if not, it is accepted this is an urge which has come on after the break time and they are being allowed to go without punishment.

If there is a rule that you go during break if you can, then how do you reinforce that rule if you allow children out of class 10 minutes after break with no repurcussions? Then you very soon end up with classes being disrupted with half a dozen kids leaving for the loo in any one session.

I can't see how asking a 6 year old to think about whether they need the toilet at break time, and learn to take responsibility for doing so without being reminded, is any different from asking a toddler whether he needs to go before you leave the house, as most of us do as a matter of course.

As for adults using the toilet at will at work, that depends on the job. I've never seen a newsreader interrupt the news for a loo break, a vicar interrupt a church service, a doctor leave a consultation or a barrister leave court. Shop workers aren't usually allowed to leave the shop floor and factory workers can't leave the production line. Bus and train drivers don't park up for a wee.

Havent you Nicki? but then a newsreader is only on air for half hour or so. and even the longest winded vicar doesnt go on for more than an hour or so. as for the rest, shop and factory workers are certainly allowed to leave the shop floor after telling the supervisor they need to! If you believe otherwise then perhaps you dont know employment law.
You obviously dont get out much Nicki!

jackyann

Sparklyfairy wrote: »

Thanks for the responses - it's very reassuring .

If I learn it does happen again, how do I go about filing a complaint? (I've never done this before..) Should it be with govenors 1st, then council then Ofsted?

When I mentioned filing a complaint with the council, the head just laughed at me & said "that will get you nowhere!" =( Really odd woman to say the least!

I find this response and your later discussion at least as worrying as the original concern.
I think you have handled this correctly and made it clear that you will stand up for your daughter.
I would take notice of whether she is generally happy in school and if she seems to be learning & thriving there.

I can see that some kids will take it into their heads to go to the loo & mess about and cause a bit of disruption, but it seems to me that is something teachers need to handle appropriately. I am getting the impression of a school not quite on top of its game I'm afraid.

And as for what used to happen: at my primary school well over 50 years ago, we could ask to go to the loo during lessons.

Sparklyfairy

faerie~spangles wrote: »

That is irrelevant.

The OP's child has been humiliated on four occasions.

For the record I'm an adult and when I need to go, I NEED to go.

Spot on. Thanks. :beer:

Oldernotwiser

faerie~spangles wrote: »

For the record I'm an adult and when I need to go, I NEED to go.

For an adult, that's a fairly silly thing to say, whatever the rights and wrongs are for young children.

artichoke

hi

we had a similar issue with DS wetting himself every day at the beginning of the school year in september. The teacher said they were not allowed to go to the loo in the first 15 minutes after break.

I tackled this by asking for a meeting asap with the school nurse and either the teacher or the head. I said that i needed to talk to the nurse because if school expected 6 yr old children to be able to hold a wee, then i knew mu DS could not do that so i needed a medical person to find out what was wrong with him, and to help me to teach him etc. I all along thought the school policy was wrong but wanted evidence to back me up. I got an appointment with the nures within the week. The nurse came along and met with me and the head. It was brilliant - she explained how many children could not hold a wee at this age, it was not seen by the medical profession as abnormal, ie not worth investigating for a medical problem at this age, and how children age 6 and even older should be allowed access to the toilet at all times...the nurse was shocked about what was happening in the classroom and explained it all in medical terms .., The school have now had to change their policy.

so get the school nurse involved asap...

Art

Art

Sparklyfairy

jackyann wrote: »

I find this response and your later discussion at least as worrying as the original concern.
I think you have handled this correctly and made it clear that you will stand up for your daughter.
I would take notice of whether she is generally happy in school and if she seems to be learning & thriving there.

I can see that some kids will take it into their heads to go to the loo & mess about and cause a bit of disruption, but it seems to me that is something teachers need to handle appropriately. I am getting the impression of a school not quite on top of its game I'm afraid.

And as for what used to happen: at my primary school well over 50 years ago, we could ask to go to the loo during lessons.

Without giving too much away, the Head is very much old school - nearing retirement. She works very hard & does many things wonderfully. However, there have been numerous issues between her & other parents. She doesn't seem to be a people person at all & has no children of her own. I personally feel that she is a perfectionist of sorts & I also think she's feeling stressed (enrollment number are low for next reception class, surprise surprise!) & when she's stressed, she kicks up a fuss & this time it happens to be using the loo. Academically, I can't fault the school. They do many wonderful trips & activities & my kids do love it there. I would recommend this school to anyone before this happened, but now I'm not so sure. I always looked past her toughness as a drive to improving the school & never thought for a minute the kids would be made to suffer like this. If I seem to be ott about it, which it may come across like I am, I wish you could have seen my dd sobbing the other day - truly shocking - then they pass it off as "she probably has a water infection" knowing full well she clearly doesn't! Grr gets my back up!

Gingham_R

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

For an adult, that's a fairly silly thing to say, whatever the rights and wrongs are for young children.

Why? I can't 'wait' either. I now know this is fairly typical in people with ADHD, but I've lived with it for 40 years and have always had to know where the toilets are wherever I go and have been known to duck behind a tree or bush when out with the dog.

Also, when I was teaching I used to go out between hour long lessons as I couldn't always wait till break.