affording to be a stay at home mum

Rachie_B

when I was a SAHM the best thing i did was join https://www.netmums.com and find other mums in the area who felt like i did !

go to the meet a mum page and answer someones post or add your own

Ive met a fab group of mums in my area and we meet up regularly.

Give it a go

aswell as meet a mum they also have listings of things to do in the area etc

3KIDSNOMONEY

There isn't that much to do in my area, and I always have to be back to fetch my other kids from school. I don't drive.

Self-esteem definitely goes and in my case my ability to hold real conversations with adults, i have depression and i really think this is brought on partly by the lonliness and isolation from being a SAHM. Sorry this is off-thread.

dianadors

My friend registered as a childminder - for school aged kids only. She gets a couple of kids dropped off early morning and takes them to school with her older kid, then looks after them until around 6 ish after school. This pays around £5 per day per child plus she charges if they want tea or breakfast. She also makes a packet in the school holidays as she has the 2 kids then - but they tend to keep her oldest entertained so its not too hard work. This way it leaves her free with her baby during the day.

Rachie_B

3KIDSNOMONEY wrote:

There isn't that much to do in my area, and I always have to be back to fetch my other kids from school. I don't drive.

Self-esteem definitely goes and in my case my ability to hold real conversations with adults, i have depression and i really think this is brought on partly by the lonliness and isolation from being a SAHM. Sorry this is off-thread.

how old are your children ?

have you thought about doing a college course,they have creches (subsidised if you are on low income) it would get you some "me" time,learn a new skill and get you back in the "adult world"

or maybe some voluntary work ,volunteer at your kids school / playgroup etc

being a SAHM shouldnt make you feel like you have described,if it does id maybe re think its what you really want

you have been a SAHM for a decade though ,thats a long time ! so its no wonder you have lost your confidence etc

are there toddler groups in your area ? if not why not set one up ?

Lo.j

3KIDSNOMONEY wrote:

I am a SAHM too. Making ends meet is really hard and we have only just started to spend to our means, despite me being a SAHM for over 10 years. It is really hard, especially when unexpected expenses come or, or the kids need shoes, days out, etc.


Agree with the craft ideas, they don't have to be expensive, save kitchen roll tubes, bubble wrap, cereal boxes and let the kids go mad!

I find it quite lonely being a SAHM as we don't having much money, I don't drive and do not have a close family. Does anyone else feel like this?

I am in the same boat re making ends meet and being lonely. I don't regret my decision to be a SAHM, but I find it hard when people assume that we are loaded because I didn't go back to work. Perhaps I put too good a face on things and nobody really knows how hard we have struggled to keep things together over the years. I didn't feel lonely until I had DS in March 2005. I have 9.5 year gap between my children and since birth of DS I feel friends treat me a bit differently now that I am back in a sea of nappies and Barney/Thomas Tank and chums. All I seem to get ( from people I considered true friends ) is " oh I couldn't go back to all that" and then proceed to tell me how great life is with older children ! Suffering from PND didn't help with the feeling of isolation either.
Sorry, I am off OP as well. Don't know what came over me ! Must be high on Infocare/Sudocream !
Good luck to all SAHMs ! If we all support each other we will get there !

lebly

get friends etc who dont use money off vouchers to give them to you, then shop at asda if they sell it they take it hether you have bought items or not aslong as they are not asda vouchers! Save a good £5 a month this way!

ps it is never affordable, you save one way the little angels somehow find a way to get you to spend more! The smiles hugs etc even for giving them shopping receipt are worth it! Cant put price tag on it!

Shop around but most of all enjoy your children at least by the time you are 90 or so you have done your bit and given them everything (including the unpaid house!)

You cannot not put a price on it or a saving, still trying to find a way to save my sanity!

3KIDSNOMONEY

:eek: The strangest thing is that I am a SAHM my youngest will be in full time school next year, and I am thinking about having another baby? I think I have finally gone mad.

Rachie_B

3KIDSNOMONEY wrote:

:eek: The strangest thing is that I am a SAHM my youngest will be in full time school next year, and I am thinking about having another baby? I think I have finally gone mad.

are you maybe worried about feeling the pressure of having to go out and find work etc ? as that is what will be "expected " of you ?

staying at home is all you have known for years and the prospect of going back into work etc can be kinda scary !

or maybe indeed you are just mad lol

3KIDSNOMONEY

You could be right. Going back to work fills me with dread.

But maybe your last statement is right, my kids have finally driven me mad!

mirrorimage0

i was a sahm mum and when it got to my youngest going full time ireally wanted another baby but resisted the urge, i went and got a job only four days a week though and got school time friendly hours too (really great boss) but its been nearly 6 or 7 months now and i still want that baby and yes OH is still saying no,