Ideas for daughter to get out of london for the summer

RAS

Community Service Volunteers offer stuff for 16-25 year olds as well as mature volunteers. Some of it means working away.

http://www.csv.org.uk/volunteering/youth

If she explained the context, they would probably be happy to find something a long way from London for her.

rachbc

I would recommend CSV - I did a year will them before Uni.

However I think its also important to look at building her confidence, self esteem and support networks here and now - are there any youth projects specifically for young women that she could get involved with - these can often have a really positive impact on helping young women understand how about healthy/ unhealthy relationships and they impact it can have on them.

Corelli

Thanks, you lot have given me some food for thought. My idea was for her to be away from her everyday environment to give her some thinking space. Yes, summer is some time away but I thought she would be tied up with exams until then. I was wrong. Building up her self esteem is obviously essential and I was thinking that earning a bit, or feeling responsible and useful in a volunteering role would be good for that. We will look for local projects as well. Now we have a short holiday planned for her with supportive friends who are talking a lot of sense to her and will take it from there.

Peater

Grape-picking/wine-making down in France?

Good seasonal work, get to meet some different folk.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

First thing to do is get her a new SIM - so she can change over all her other numbers, but not his and he can't get hold of hers or swap to another phone to get around her blocking his number. And promise her that, whatever happens, as soon as he gets hold of her number, you won't complain one bit about replacing the SIM again.

So from the moment she is away from him, she can't be bullied by suicide threats, proclamations of undying love, demands for 'stuff', etc.

And make sure she isn't alone when she gives him the news - it's a very, very risky time for women of any age.

Savvy_Sue

I agree that you need to work on her self-esteem etc, and especially in relation to understanding healthy / non-healthy relationships. Otherwise this will only be the first of many such relationships.

daska

It seems to me that she could do with going on an assertiveness course. Ring her school/college and ask or try the local Adult Education Service, there may be a cost involved but there are often free courses around.

Are there any particular types of activities she likes? Is she interested in children, horses, motorbikes, gardening, reading etc? We might come up with other ideas for you if we know what floats her boat.

Acc72

the_cat wrote: »

I think you would be better off helping her deal with her problems at home. Teaching her that running away from her issues is the best option will not serve her best in the long term. At 17, it is understandable that her first instinct is to avoid her problems but that imo does not make it the right course to take

(Sorry if that comes across blunt, not intended to be!)

I agree with the above.

And also the comment from Savvy Sue - your daughter is very young and she needs to understand that "running away" from a problem is not the best answer, and that she needs to understand how to deal with "issues" otherwise she may find herself moving from one such relationship to another in the future.