Ectopic pregnancy

Candlewax

Would anyone be interested in starting a new thread for those who have experienced an ectopic pregnancy?

I have been on the ttc and miscarraige support threads which have been really helpful but wondered if a more specific thread might be a good support (to me and others)

So my story: me and DH have been ttc since July 2011 and I had a miscarriage at 6 weeks in September. Then surgery for an ectopic pregnancy in December 2011. I had a tube removed. We are waiting 3 months before trying again (as advised). I am eager to start trying again but also really sacred about another miscarriage or ectopic pregnancy.

Has anyone else experience similar? Perhaps we could support each other? Help each other to look to the future and discuss our experiences?

lisawood78

I have had 2 ectopic pregnancies, one spontaneous and one IVF. Both resulted in full Salpingectomies leaving me with no tubes and no other chance to have a child than through IVF, of which I have had 8 rounds (but that is another story!)
I have no children and the chance of now having one seems extremely slim.

I hope that as a TTC'er with one tube you can be successful, just because you have had problems in the past does not mean that it will happen again, I had problem tubes to start with which is what caused my issues.

Good luck

liuhutOz

Hi Candlewaz, I just wanted to post to offer you support. I went through the same thing in Jan 2000. I also had a tube removed and then had to wait 3 months before we could try again. It was a very difficult time for me and I was very low. It did work out ok for me, I now have two girls, 10 and 6! I still get a little bit upset about it now, at the time it dominated my left but as they say time is a great healer and I just tend to think about it on the anniversary which is coming up.
Just give yourself and your body time to get over it.. Hard I know
L x

CH27

I had one 18yrs ago & went on to have my son who is 16.

I worried myself sick before we started trying again & worried until he was born.
I was offered an internal scan ery early to check if he was in the right place & this was very reassuring that he was in the right place.

I always remember who I lost & always will & my son is so precious & I know I am blessed to have him.

Good luck xx

moomoomama27

I had an ectopic pregnancy in April 2002. It was almost 12 weeks before it was detected and I lost a tube and almost my ovary. My other tube was said to be fine, and we could start to TTC after 2-3 months. I was told it would be difficult to become pregnant, and that it was not unusual for it to take up to 18 months. We started TTC after the 3 months and I became pregnant immediatley giving birth to my lovely little lady 9 months later! I became pregnant again when she was 9 months and miscarried, but 4 months later became pregnant with my Son who I carried to term. I didn't have any problems with my fertility following the ectopic, so there is plenty of hope, and my story is not isolated. I used to post on a support board in the early days following my ectopic, and the ladies were great, I'll see if later on I can find if the website still exists.

In my subsequent pregnancies following the ectopic I was offered early scans at 6 and 8 weeks each time to make sure that the baby was in the right place.

Candlewax

Thank you so much for your responses. It helps to feel that I am not the only one to have gone through this.

lisawood78; I truely hope you do have success. A" slim chance" is still a chance. Are you going through IVF at the moment?

Thank you all for sharing your experiences which have given me hope.

I have been told that if we get lucky again I will have a scan at 6 weeks which reassures me. I am a mixture of emotions really. I am frustrated at having to wait at least another 6 weeks before we can start ttc again. I am going to turn 35 soon, not old I know but I am concious that age may become a factor if our ttc journey is a long one. At the same time I am really scared of not being in control when we do start ttc again as it often made me feel like I had absolutely no control over what my body was doing (or not doing properly).

Anyway, enough of me rambling on!

Thank you all again for taking the time to read and for responding.

Chocolate_Cookie_Monster

Hi Candlewax,

I had an ectopic in Nov 2011, I had surgery but they managed to save my tube - I say save but they said it means a higher risk of another EP in the future. I had been trying over 2 years and this PG was from IUI.
I only just stopped bleeding last week and my HcG only dropped to very low levels the week before. I am 2 months post op now and like you I'm eager to get back to it.

Mentally I'm OK - I have had a few bad days but generally I'm fine but I'm very scared of it happening again. It is a hard one as I have read the miscarriage thread but don't feel like I belong there. I have read many websites recently and some professionals don't even consider an ectopic as being a "proper" loss rather than "just" a procedure. The number of times I was told its products of conception - I think thats why I felt so detached from it all. :cool:

Take this time over the next 6 weeks to fully recover - physically and emotionally. It will fly past.

Candlewax

Hi Chocolate Cookie Monster. Thanks for your reply. I know what you mean about feeling detached. Emotionally I am doing ok too. But have been having difficulty getting to sleep. I'm not really thinking about the EP when I am trying to get to sleep, so not sure if its that or other stuff I have going on in my head at the moment, (eg work etc).

I was quite surprised at how nice the hospital were. They gave me the option of attending a service and having the "pregnancy tissue" as they called it cremated and scattered in a memorial garden they have there. I chose not to attend but was reassured that they were acting appropriately.

Sometimes I worry that I haven't been upset enough about what has happened. I know what you mean about having bad days though. I am reassured to know that when we do start trying, if we get pregnant I will have an early scan.

Good luck for when you start ttc again. Hopefully both of our dreams will come true!

CH27

Candlewax wrote: »

Hi Chocolate Cookie Monster. Thanks for your reply. I know what you mean about feeling detached. Emotionally I am doing ok too. But have been having difficulty getting to sleep. I'm not really thinking about the EP when I am trying to get to sleep, so not sure if its that or other stuff I have going on in my head at the moment, (eg work etc).

I was quite surprised at how nice the hospital were. They gave me the option of attending a service and having the "pregnancy tissue" as they called it cremated and scattered in a memorial garden they have there. I chose not to attend but was reassured that they were acting appropriately.

Sometimes I worry that I haven't been upset enough about what has happened. I know what you mean about having bad days though. I am reassured to know that when we do start trying, if we get pregnant I will have an early scan.

Good luck for when you start ttc again. Hopefully both of our dreams will come true!

You've been through major surgery & it all happens so quick that you're possibly still a bit gobsmacked by it all.

Chocolate_Cookie_Monster

CH27 wrote: »

You've been through major surgery & it all happens so quick that you're possibly still a bit gobsmacked by it all.

That is so true. I went for my early scan (due to fertility treatment) and I was more concerned about how many sacs there would be in there - only to be told there was nothing and I would have to have an operation on top of that. I had only just got my head around being pregnant - then I had 3 days in hospital on a waiting list and after the surgery I was in a haze of painkillers and pain.

My OH said he had a good cry at the time but I was stuck in hospital and my emotions were more about being lonely and bored than anything else. I certainly don't think I am emotionally over this - like you candlewax I haven't been as upset as I feel I should be - or as I know I could be. So in the back of my head I know it will come. I have drawn a line for now though and I will focus on TTC again. I am sure I will be affected if I ever get PG again and the stress of losing one already.

Its never far from my mind though - especially when I see friends that are PG and they talk about being PG - I remember that I was one of them once (albeit for a short amount of time) talking and making plans and being excited. I'm not sure how I will be when all the babies are born.

My EDD was mid July. I think that will be my tough time. x

Candlewax

Several people I know are trying or expecting. Some have recently had their baby. It is hard. I flit from being totally fine about it all to quite angry that it is so easy for others and not for me. Not very nice of me to think that way I know.

Interestingly it is CD1 for me today and feeling the pain and seeing blood has bought it all back again. So I am feeling a little emotional and not really with it. But that is one cycle closer to trying again I guess.