Is my friend a hoarder?

Hanging_by_a_thread

I think this thread may be about me I am just as the OP describes.

I have a washing machine that is 13 years old. It works perfectly okay and in all the time I have had it, it has cost me about £100 to repair by replacing the door seals. The bloke that came to fix it told me to not replace it till it falls apart as, in his words 'they dont make them like they use to love'. Quite how old he thought I or it was I dread to think :rotfl:

My hoover is 15 years old. It is a dyson and works really well. Sometimes I consider trading it in for one of those lovely looking 'ball' types but what is the point. When it gives up the ghost I will.

I have two lovely old sofas which have grown more and more comfy with age. My grans beautiful old chair sits by my window. I had it re-upholstered a while back and some new padding put in it. With any luck it will last for years.

By not replacing stuff that works perfectly well or is reasonably priced to fix I can spend my money on other areas of my life like eating out, socialising, having lovely holidays, driving a nice car and wearing nice clothes. I dont go without at all or struggle on with well past their best equipment or utensils etc. I just prioritise how I spend my cash.

To be honest when I first saw this thread I thought it was going to be about someone who filled every room in their house with collections of things and didn't have room to move. Like the folk you see on those documentaries sometimes.

Interesting thread OP

nearlyrich

I have just thrown away the broken bit my son put back in the box after repairing my old IBM laptop in 2004, not sure why it was still in the drawer in my office LOL

tinktinktinkerbell

bigpound wrote: »

Whenever I have challenged them for example, 'If you get rid of this old junk from this room, you could use this room for something useful'

and what right do you think you have to do this?

anyone who comes round here telling us what we could do with rooms get a swift sharp kick up the backside out the door, you have no right to go into someones home and start telling them what they can do, no right at all!

and good on your friend for getting full use out of items rather than replacing it when the sniff of a new model comes about

its none of your business quite frankly

tinktinktinkerbell

Hanging_by_a_thread wrote: »

To be honest when I first saw this thread I thought it was going to be about someone who filled every room in their house with collections of things and didn't have room to move. Like the folk you see on those documentaries sometimes.

thats what i thought too lol

was shocked to read it was actually about a person who gets full use out of products

Gingernutty

bigpound, you have my sympathy but unless there are compelling safety, hygiene or fire hazards, then you just have to button it.

My Mother hoarded small trinkets, junk shop finds and bargains. Sorting through it all after she died brought up a load of '!!!!!!' moments. :huh:

Size 20 knickers when she never made it beyond a size 10, six pairs of pyjamas for Dad who is a vest and pants man, more curtains than the house had windows for - it was all crammed into every nook and cranny around a huge house she obsessively cleaned every day until she became too ill.

:mad: Even now, the words guaranteed to have me screaming in disgust are "It might come in handy some day". :mad:

Keeping the whistle from an old kettle when they replaced it with an electric one, the plastic gubbins from the old vacuum cleaner, old purses and wallets, old broken watches - the kitchen drawers of my parents' house were shrines to the useless 'bits' that accumulate over time. :shocked:

Dad was a builder and kept every little bit of copper pipe he had spare. Not to sell it, but "It might come in handy, on a job".

It got so bad that he started to nail old doors to the rafters of his shed and slide pipes, tubing and old bars into the gaps, like shelves.

Of course, one day, the washing machine (in the shed) went into spin cycle and one of the doors fell off bringing the whole lot down onto the machine and everything else that was in there.

I had to shift a good hundredweight of copper, pewter and lead before I could get to the machine.

Using old, well looked after stuff is one thing but keeping the old when you've got a new thing to replace it is pointless - the parts won't fit as the newer model won't be compatible with the old and it's a waste of space.

Just cut the plug off it and dispose of it responsibly.

Me? If I have no use for it, then I don't give it house room.

When I acquired an RSI called tenosynovitis, there was no point keeping my old flute. I couldn't play it anymore and I just didn't want the reminder of what I now couldn't do hanging around the house. So I sold it through a dealer.

One of my brothers still can't get over how I got rid of something that I had once enjoyed using. After all, "It didn't take up too much room."

Arrrrrgh! :mad:

So, every time your friend complains that she doesn't have the space - back away from the temptation to scream.

Tell her you've said all you are going to say on her clutter problem and she had better change the subject. :sad:

If there is a real problem - she has to climb over stuff to get through the house, :eek: certain rooms can't be used anymore, :eek: the ghosts of washing machines past are rusting away in the garden or garage :eek: and it's so filthy that you try to avoid going there - "Let's meet at Starbucks for a coffee" :eek: - then you might need to offer help and support.

Only then. And keep schtum until then.

Padstow

bigpound wrote: »

Tiddlywinks, you sound exactly like them!

To all the people saying it's none of your business: they keep complaining they don't have enough space and need to clear out all their stuff to eventually sell the place.

This is the whole point I think. Hoarding causes no problems until circumstances suddenly change and someone else has to take over.
My ex, hoarded everything up the third floor of our home. There is heavy DiY machinery, client records held in huge metal storage etc. There is no way I can get them down for disposal.

He sudenly left for a newer model which was fine, :Tbut now the home is to be sold, I'm faced with somehow getting this stuff down two flights of stairs and disposing of all the confidential paperwork regarding his clients.

So by all means live in a tip, just don't bequeath it to someone else to sort out.

I have yet to sort the junk drawer in the kitchen. Where the old or new batteries live, who can tell? Yards of whirly cable pertaining to long defunct electrical devices. Are they defunct though? Will I come across a device that I have no whirly thing for, and think dammit, I should never have thrown it away?

Hoarding is selfish, with no concern for those who have to sort the stuff.

fluffnutter

I think your friend sounds remarkably pleasant, bigpound. If someone came to my house and told me 'If you get rid of this old junk from this room, you could use this room for something useful' I wouldn't mildly remark that I'd get round to it some time, I'd show them the door. Are you this rude and patronising to all your friends?

tom717

Your friend does not sound like a hoarder! You should see my grandad's house. He has rooms piled so high you can't get in them. He doesn't like to throw things away in case he finds a use for them one day, but there is no way he could get to most of the items in his house even if he remembers where they are. He doesn't even like to throw away newspapers.

thatgirlsam

My Grandma has had her ironing board since 1940!!

Its wooden and looks like it belongs in a museum but still works fine so why change it?

It would be UNTHINKABLE for my Grandparents to change something that still worked - and they are not poor!

My Grandad was brought up in poverty in Poland and then spent 2 years in a concentration camp and then they both lived through the war.. so to them they are living in luxury in their bungalow

He looks through skips to see what people have thrown away and then knocks and asks for it if he thinks he can mend it!

He is 90 and got his overalls on to try and mend my car recently!

They don't come from a throw away generation like us and more power to people who follow suit..

He isn't like Mr Trebus though! There isn't that much in their house, just some very old working items

Hanging_by_a_thread

thatgirlsam wrote: »

He isn't like Mr Trebus though! There isn't that much in their house, just some very old working items

I bet they all work far better than anything he could buy now too. With all the technology we have it is disappointing that products tend to be such poor quality. I think the throw away attitude in society now contributes alot to this. Manufacturers dont see the need to provide things that will last. They see more profit in selling cheap and cheerfull.