Im not going to be an Ostrich anymore (or in short F1s debt diary)

PinotGrigio41

Just want to drop by and say I havent forgotten you. I have actually typed three posts to you, then had to run off to do something else halfway through then logged myself out. I will be back later xxxx

PinotGrigio41

f1widow wrote: »

Hi well I have had a very emotional few days mainly from the kindness my lovely friends over on "Knit your Share" forum have shown - its just a shame its virtual kindness - we live in all different directions - Ive even been offered more wool if I get short of pennies - its strange that out of just one other "real" friend and my Mother In Law its actually only my virtual friends who have shown any real support (sorry real friend and MIL but thats the truth!) - thats another reason why Ive decided to ramble on here - some around me are as helpful as a chocolate fireguard:D
Secondly on day four I have had a few tears a couple of letters came today - nothing different to normal but it showed how long we have had one of the debts for and I realised that we have been so silly - it should have been paid off this year - so we have doubled if not tripled the length of time it should be paid in!
Anyway I must stop as I cant afford to replace my computer through water damage :rotfl:

1. I found 68p on money hunt - so that now in pot
2. An elderly friend has kindly told me about "Marmade" - makes 6lb marmalade - you need one bag of sugar - Marmade is 1.48 plus 99p sugar - she says it tastes lovely and she would normally buy the more expensive marmalade - Im not sure whether it works out better / cheaper than a value marmalade though - but I could have a couple of jars and a couple could be used as gifts or bottle gifts for school - something to think about
3. Meant to tell you about www.offeroasis.co.uk - its worth a couple of clicks every day so far Ive had some Olay Regenerist, 2 mini tubes of toothpaste, sample biscuits, BB Cream samples, and shower gel- the way I look at it is that you can store all these little samples etc up and could be classed as a treat for you for free - one of our sample toothpastes covered us until payday one week

Plus sadly I felt a little disheartened by the news that my lovely sister is having an extension and whilst Im not really jealous I realise that my inability not to be good with money has made our lives so very different (oh and the fact she married a well off fella whereas I married a not so well off one:rotfl:) and I always worry that at 40 will we ever have a place of our own etc

Sorry Im whinging! Tomorrow is another day & another dollar

Oh by the way I meant to ask when you have all said try CCCS etc Im a bit unsure whether they are different from the Money Advisor that Im using - Money Advisor is from our local DIstrict Council - Ive been given his services due to my health issues and using the services of a support organisations - he is pretty much like National Debtline (from the things he has asked and dealt with) but my own personal advisor - he deals with my creditors, advises on benefits, etc explains for want of a better word any loopholes - in our area Welfare Rights had there budget for benefits/financial advisor cut from the Council and they now employ there own advisor which is him - so think I dont want to jeoperdise my relationship with him by going to CCCS or confuse things for that matter - but please tell me if Im wrong

Well this is a really long post so im sorry but its off my chest now
Hope all the rest of you have had a good day x

Morning, how you doing ?

I feel like its probably a bit late to answer your post from a couple of days ago now, but as you were feeling a bit up in the air at the time, I didnt want to ignore it ! I hope you are feeling brighter now though. Your posts on my diary sound like you are pretty upbeat ! Or is it all an illusion ?!:D

Re the letters and the length of debts, I know the feeling there, we have paid ours about 10 times over I'm sure and had the interest not been piling on all the time they would have been long gone by now, also I have kicked myself why I didnt do what I'm doing now many years ago when I had my first LBM, but I didnt and I'm doing it now. You are doing really well now and we need to focus on the here and now and the future, not what we did and didnt do as it wont do any good whatsoever

Ok, re the extension, snap, my sister is also having the same, well its not an extension its knocking downs walls, kitchens , you name it and no doubt there will be an extension involved somewhere along the line. Another relative is having her house totally knocked down and rebuilt. But do you know what, although obviously money helps ( particularly in our situations !) I am a big believer in that it doesnt always make you happier. I see plenty of people who appear to really have it all, but in reality if you dig deeper the show homes, clothes etc are hiding the fact that they arent as happy as they appear, things arent always as they seem . I'm not including your sister in this obviously. I now think to myself "Well good on her, its lovely for her to have these things, they work hard for it, but then we work blimmin hard too, but have got in a pickle along the way , but we will get there, and if we dont then cest la vie !:T Will a bigger kitchen really make me a much happier person ? Maybe for a week !! Thats probably no help to you at all, but I am surrounded by very wealthy people and sometimes feel like the poor relation in comparison, but I keep smiling broadly ! Am I going off on a tangent again now ?!:rotfl:

Re your Money Advisor, he sounds to me as though he is doing the same if not similar job to the CCCS anyway. Would you be able to ask him the question ? Might be good for you to have a specific person who knows your situation inside out helping you out rathert han whoever happens to pick up the phone at the CCCS.

Anyway as you say another day, another dollar. You will get there, keep positive . You can do this !

Enjoy your day!

Pinot x

HappyNow

Hi, I've seen your posts on a few other threads so I just thought I would pop by and say hello . Isn't this forum wonderful for keeping the motivation up? Good luck and I will keep popping back to see how things are going for you X

f1widow

Ive been so busy reading everything else on here had forgotton to pop back on my own diary

Thanks for the comments - yes Ive got my head round the savings bit and what to do with it - me just having a made mental block really - spoke to the Money Advisor and she agreed to just keeping it to one side and using it when needed or if have enough pay something off completely- she said that if you start paying bits and pieces to your creditors they will expect it all the time - I kind of thought I was being dishonest to the creditors by not declaring it (iykwim!) - whilst Im not saying lie I think in the last week Ive realised that by being "over honest" Ive not done myself any favours if that makes sense
When I did budget plans before I always cut ourselves short this meant the budget was never going to be kept to - you stop paying it - you get them on the phone - you hide - the problem gets worse etc etc

Thanks chalky I will go over and have a look at that - you are a star xxx

And yes with all eyes watching I cannot give up - main reason I "came out"
Monday is the start of another week another week and another few pounds in the pot :j:j (hopefully!)

f1widow

Well Ive been AWOL for a few days and I feel guilty

I have:-
1) Finally done my Income and Expenditure for the Money Advisor - part of it is made up of what we actually do spend and the other half shows what I want to budget for ie MOTs, tv licence etc on a monthly basis rather than wait for it to arrive and then wing it
2) NOT spent any money for 4 days - just used what we have in the cupboard / freezer (Believe me thats good for us!)
3) Been doing more plotting in anticipation of DHs first pay day since I stopped being an ostrich - its Friday!

On the bad side 1) my Dr decided to give me the good news that I have Costachondritis (?) - basically ligaments in my ribs are inflamed and it hurts like billy o! and Ive been feeling a bit sorry for myself - I saw on some other diaries that others are feeling poorly - is it all the worry coming out of us after admitting problems etc or is it just that time of year!
2) My DH keeps talking about spending some money at the end of the month as he will receive his yearly bonus - whilst I agree that he works so very hard and does not have a lot any other time of the year I could weep as Im trying to sort things out and he wants to be "Edna Bucket" - when I say spending Im talking small treat not hundreds! - most of the bonus will be used to pay things ie DS school trip which I agreed to before pulling head out of sand - with a little going in the pot - and by the way the bonus is not huge (especially after Mr T gets his cut!) but it is something

In the meantime I saw on another Diary (sorry mind gone!) that we were discussing pots and I too have virtual pots in my head and cant wait to get them going to relieve the worry on how it will all come together - I wish my bank had the pots like I think Barclays do - I mentioned on the other diary that I remember when the men got paid in cash - walked in on a Friday - put money in pots in cupboard ie £x in rent pot £X fuel £xrates gave some to the wife for housekeeping and the balance went in his back pocket - I know this to happen as I saw my neighbour do it and they always maintained they owed nothing and always paid their bills - maybe my Mum and Dad did it as well but I never saw it happen - in those days it was all a mystery to children wasnt it - I sound old dont I!

The downside of doing my Income and Expenditure is that Ive realised there is not a great deal to pay Debitors and now Im even more worried that the Money Advisor will sway even more towards Bankruptcy - I cant fully do my SOA as Im waiting for some figures from the money advisor to come over - BUT I do believe there are some savings to be made from my I&E and Ive been over budget on things like food etc as I do want to shave that down but thought I ought to be over rather than under

Im just one big ball of panic this week:D:D:D:eek::eek::eek::D:D:D

Catch up more later xxx

PS Thanks to the member who gave me the survey sites - fantastic will be looking at those :T:T

f1widow

Phew Just spoken to Money Advisor - they are happy my I & E is as it is at the moment and they understand that somethings will be tweeked and budgeting for car, birthdays, etc is starting from now

Ive told them to tell me off if somethings are way off or somethings not enough! I have broad shoulders I can cope - Im a woman after all

Did anyone watch Super Scrimpers Channel 4 Monday night - I think it is great - watched last series - only critisim is the family of 5 fed for £50 well if it was just evening meals I would say that was easy - did not show breakfast, pack-ups and tea! - I already make the "Sausage Surprise" (always with the announcement like Jean on Eastenders gives!) - did like the nails the girls were doing

Im off for a break- tea and island Parish recorded from last night - its not for the religious aspect i like to see how others live - its a very calming programme and like to see how they survive as its quite low income there on Bara etc - ps you will learn im documentary queen me!

PinotGrigio41

Hello you !

How are you feeling now ? Think you may be right with all the illnesses going around. Yours sounds particularly nasty though. Get well soon ! Im thinking it could be a whole host of reasons we all feel so grotty, money stuff, miserable January blues , the list goes on and on....or may be we really do just have good old fashioned virus's after all !

There has been so much going on with you, never a dull moment eh ? !

Good news from your Money Advisor with the I&E then, thats a bit of a weight of off your mind at least. Are you still waiting on which route he thinks you should go down ?

I didnt watch Super Scrimpers, I meant to record it and completely forgot, but I will see if its on I player maybe or being repeated as I would like to watch it. We did watch DIY SOS last night, just happened to switch the TV on. Well, if I was even considering feeling sorry for myself at the moment, it well and truly snapped me right out of it. I was is absolute pieces watching how the lady and her Autistic son were living, and then his wonderful reaction to what the DIY team had done to their home, and how pleased with the little things he was, blinds at the windows, a door on the loungefor example. We are so so lucky in comparison, regardless of everything, although I know that anyway and am always telling the chldren so it really brought it home to me ! ( Actually I probably should be posting this in my diary as well, but I will burble on then maybe copy and paste !!) Mr Pinot and DD2 were both watching with tears in their eyes, then when it had finished I called DD2 down from her room, rewound it and then made her sit and watch it as well...........just to remind them how very very lucky they were, incase they ever had any doubts ! Think they thought I was maybe going slightly stir crazy, but hey ho whats new !!

Anyway I'm off now, take care x

Box_of_Fluffies

Hi F1, well done on finally doing your I&E. It can be a scary moment but it looks like between you and your Money Adviser that you have things under control.

The tea & parish thing on Bara is that the programme with Martin Clunes or something else?

PinotGrigio41

How you doing F1 ? All good I hope ? x

f1widow

Hi all - have really neglected the diary this week and I feel very guilty (dont worry I have not slipped or anything just not got on here!)

Oh Island Parish - no its not Martin Clunes (i think you mean Doc Martin) - Island Parish is real life islanders off the coast of Scotland - I also have a particular want to watch it as I belong to charity knitting group Loving Hands (HQ is in Scotland) and a lot of them are in that direction or have visited Barra etc.

Well Ive spent a few days surrounded by bits of paper working out how Im going to sort my pots out - this is my biggest headache for me!!!! - am I making it toooooooo difficult?????????????????/

Right so now Im throwing it over to you - here it is ................

OH's payday - Ive allowed for all the monthly bills that come out in the next week - this leaves "x" left over it is not enough to put all the money away in my "pots" ie food for month, petrol for month, monthly items such as saving for car tax etc and this is also before I take the money out for debt payment - I have little payments during the month for benefits and this is where we always go wrong as I pay all the bills and then you find such big gaps to try and survive food and petrol wise ????????????????????????? - I think if I just take out debt payment and as much as I can for food and petrol - the rest goes in another "virtual" pot for tax, emergencies etc

WHAT WOULD YOU LOVELY LOT DO?????
You would never believe I used to be an office manager/accounts
am I "over working this"

So whilst I have been quiet on here - my brain cells havent:rotfl::rotfl:

Also I feel a little dispondent as I dont feel things are moving quickly enough with the Money Advisor - although its not making any difference to me as I dont need (as they are doing all the work for me)the information, I still have not had the final balance of how much I have in total outstanding and then a breakdown of how much to who - also this month I dont know how much they want me to pay anyone - Im probably just fretting about it too much

On a positive note - I used everything up in my fridge this week before my weekly shop came (its sounds terrible but it not a regular occurance in this house) - also when I did the shop I worked out my list (something I had let slip - Ive become very aware of whats in the cupboards both food and toiletries - so the F1 household only brought this week one loaf of bread and 2 pints of milk - I have not noticed any loose change lying around but am going on a hunt shortly

Sorry for waffling and hopefully in the next week I can start putting some figures in my diary of savings / paids etc
Have a great weekend x