Can we afford to have a baby?

Derivative

The simple answer is - you can't afford a child. The way that Britain is at the moment, in order for the average person to have children, they must accept various handouts from the government in order to get by.

If you think of a child as an item to be budgeted, it'll probably be the single most expensive thing you'll ever have. Most people don't think of their children as cost centres, except in dark humour.

Personally I can't see myself ever having children as I wouldn't be happy without being able to comfortably afford top tier education and a good location to bring them up in.

If you want children - you can't let the budgetary constraints stop you, as said above. Most people don't go for ruthless efficiency in their finances. We buy cars even though it's cheaper to take public transport/taxis for most people. We eat out at restaurants when Tesco would be 1/10th the price. You have to work out what you want in life.

an9i77

Basically would you rather be struggling to make ends meet and have a baby, or slightly better off but childless?

dreamsicle

Thank you again for your replies. I don't live a luxury lifestyle as it is, most spare cash is saved or put into the house in some way or another, so I am used to budgeting/looking for bargains/collecting points etc... and as it's the way I've always lived, I don't think it will become a massive shock for me, if you see what I mean.
In respect to the comment about maternity pay (and sorry for my naiivety) but when you leave is the decision as to whether you return to work made when you leave or afterwards? It's just I know several women who have said they'll return to work only for the baby to arrive and they change their minds?
I have thought about my age and the fact these things can take longer the older you get. I would have loved to have had kids years ago, but I had never found the right person before now.

Carl31

I disagree with what many say, You can always afford a baby, its whether you want to thats the difference

Babies do cost a lot, and it will probably mean giving up luxuries, prioritising your life differently, maybe not using the car so much, not having takeaways, not having holidays, losing the sky TV, cutting back on bills etc..

Although i would never advocate it, there’s plenty of single parents out there raising children with nothing, no job, no savings. What your opinion is on what and how they do it is another matter, they still manage it, but they generally go without many luxuries that working parents may have

Gigglepig

I'm sorry if this isn't the answer you are looking for, but there is no way I would plan children right now in your current situation unless there was an immediate medical problem which made it unlikely that you'd be able to have a baby past 30.

Instead I'd save as hard as possible for the next 3 years, see if your OH can look for promotions, additional training or other ways to earn more, and then re-consider in 3 years time when you should be in a much stronger situation financially. At 27/28 you are not that old yet!

Edited to say
I think you are being very sensible to try to save up a bit first!

zaksmum

When I had my firstborn many years ago, I was 19 and O/H 20 and we didn't have a penny to our name. We rented a cheap flat from the council and just coped as best we could. We used terry nappies and were grateful for second hand baby stuff from kind neighbours...everyone was in the same position. All we had was our baby and each other, but we managed and we're still together 40 years later.

It's not just about waiting till you have enough money or you'd be waiting forever.

Gillyx

dreamsicle wrote: »

Thank you again for your replies. I don't live a luxury lifestyle as it is, most spare cash is saved or put into the house in some way or another, so I am used to budgeting/looking for bargains/collecting points etc... and as it's the way I've always lived, I don't think it will become a massive shock for me, if you see what I mean.
In respect to the comment about maternity pay (and sorry for my naiivety) but when you leave is the decision as to whether you return to work made when you leave or afterwards? It's just I know several women who have said they'll return to work only for the baby to arrive and they change their minds?
I have thought about my age and the fact these things can take longer the older you get. I would have loved to have had kids years ago, but I had never found the right person before now.

Depends on your maternity pay benefits, if you get the minimum of 6 weeks at 90% pay and then the rest at SMP, you can decide not to go back after baby is here, if your work offer enhanced maternity benefits, i.e full pay for 3 months, half pay for 6 months etc, then there is a lot of built in clauses that say you have to return. So just depends really.

mrshappy

You learn how to manage on what you have, I had my first 15 years ago, separated from my ex husband when my son was a year old and got by fine-it was tough financially, but I worked and we managed fine, fast forward a few years-I met someone else, settled down, waited until we were in a decent financial position and we are currently undergoing fertility investigations-in all probability we have left it too late, so we have a nice lifestyle and house, but no much wanted baby.

Oog

Alternatively it can happen right away...

I think being a little financially prepared is not a bad thing so checking out maternity/benefits/flexible job options out now might not be a bad idea!

dreamsicle

Gigglepig wrote: »

I'm sorry if this isn't the answer you are looking for, but there is no way I would plan children right now in your current situation unless there was an immediate medical problem which made it unlikely that you'd be able to have a baby past 30.

That is fair enough, tbh that's the response I was expecting to get from everyone. I know our wages are not great, it's just frustrating that there are such a lack of jobs out there atm.

Thanks Gilly (sorry can't work out how to multi-quote!), my employers like to give their employees as little as they can legally get away with, so I'm 99% sure they will not offer any maternity benefits and it will be SMP.