Can we afford to have a baby?

dreamsicle

My husband and I would like to start a family in the next couple of years (2014 perhaps?). The problem is, I do not think we are, or ever will be, in a position to afford a child, especially as I would most likely have to give up work, as with the hours and type of work I do, it would be very difficult to continue working with a child.

I know this is probably a very vague sort of question, but I was wondering from the experience of others, how much it is possible to survive on as a couple with a child and stay at home parent? We both earn approximately £12000 after tax and our outgoings are roughly £1300 a month (we could possibly cut that down by around £200) meaning a shortfall of at least £100, not to mention of course costs of things like nappies or other baby essentials, heating/electric on more if I’m at home. We were hoping to build up some savings to put away and use these to live on in the first few years while I’m not working. Are we being totally unrealistic?

BOBS

Hi and welcome dreamside. In my opinion if you waited until you thought yourself in a good financial position to start a family you would never do it. Sometimes its a leap of faith. D
Have you checked out entitled to .com - if you are a SAHM you should get some tax credits based on your husbands 12k income, plus you get your family allowance.
All the best with your decision x

daska

You can never afford a baby, largely cos they grow into children and then teenagers - surely the most expensive creatures in the world LOL

No, actually, babies themselves are really cheap, generally you don't have to pay for them (I'm thinking IVF not black market baby snatchers) or pay for food and you can get the various bits you NEED for free if you look around. The biggest costs are loss of earnings and nappies.

Realistically, if you have a baby, you find ways to afford what you need. That's just what parent's do.

BOBS

Quick look at entitled to seems you should get about £105 extra per week (i think )

tescobabe69

Dreamside, you dont say how old you or your husband are, could you work and save for a few years ? Might your husband improve his earnings ?
We didnt have our first until we had a good home, my wife was 29 and we had been married 8 years at that time.

flutterby_lil

I agree with the others, you can never afford a baby as no matter how much money you have you live to your means and always want your child to have the best.

You just learn to adapt and change your priorities - you may not think twice now about going to chiqiutos for a £60 meal, to the cinema in the executive seats, buying their popcorn, spending over £100 for your night. When you have school uniform to buy you will get this first and may get a takeaway at home instead of the expensive night out.

Instead of your luxurious holidays to the Maldives costing £3500 (I am not saying you do, just being hypothetical here lol) you will have a lovely family holiday at a ParkDean/Haven site for £400. You make changes to suit your money and will not think twice about sacrificing what was once normal to give your child a good life.

Good luck.

I am 29 weeks pregnant with my second, work in a school and OH is self employed, we manage ok but times are tough sometimes.

Kandboys

I agree that if you wait until you can afford to have a baby you will always be waiting. DH and I used to work and earn good money but over the years our income reduced with me going part time then eventually giving up work to raise our boys. So now we rely on DH's sole wage. You adapt to whatever income you have coming in believe me

dreamsicle

Thanks everyone, I honestly thought I would get replies saying I'm selfish to even think about it! So thank you for making me feel better.
Tescobabe69 - I'm 27, my husband is 28, so we would be thinking of trying for a baby when I'm 29/30, husband is 30/31. He has been applying for jobs for over a year, the most he's had is 1 interview and they gave the job to someone internal Unfortunately there's not a lot going, but we both try to get a bit of overtime in when we can, that sort of thing.

Thank you BOBS, I didn't realise tax credits were an option. I think I may have done the calculations wrongly as it came out as £30 for me!

Flutterby - £3500 in the Maldives, ah that would be the life, wouldn't it?!

an9i77

Hi there - just to echo what others have said there is never a 'right' time to have a baby. In my case I got pregnant by accident, so I suppose I was lucky in the sense that we never had to make the decision to have a baby (although we did decide of course to keep it, but I suppose that's a different kind of decision!). I think what it boils down to is if you want a baby enough to make the financial sacrifice, but I'd hate to think of someone who really wanted to have a baby but didn't purely because of financial reasons. Throughout history, people with not much money have had kids, often lots of kids, and coped. You will get tax credit/child benefit of at a rough guess a couple of hundred pounds a month for someone in your situation (perhaps more, that's a rough guess so check it out). Although youre bombarded with the message that you need to buy all sorts of things when the baby is born, they can and do survive on just the essentials, and second hand is the way to go, there are so many bargains to be had from ebay/charity shops. My baby's nearly one and I've sold a lot of the things that we bought for him in the beginning as he no longer needs them, some of these things I bought second hand to begin with so I suppose you can say for those things he's more or less had them for free minus the ebay fees, or occasionally I've sold something for more that what I bought it for and made a profit! What you really need is - buggy/moses basket/cot/car seat if you have a car. All can be got second hand except perhaps the car seat for safety reasons. Plus nappies/wipes. I couldn't breastfeed so had to buy milk/bottles/steriliser etc but if you can breastfeed that saves a lot. I bought loads of clothes which was a complete waste as a few babygros will do with perhaps a couple of outfits for best, in the early months my baby was sick several times a day anyway so there was no point him wearing anything 'special'. (but I couldn't resist all the cute baby clothes in the shops). Anyway what I am saying is you don't need to spend as much on the baby as perhaps you think. Can you get saving now, save hard for a year, and then you'll have some money tucked away for when you fall pregnant?

flutterby_lil

dreamsicle wrote: »

Flutterby - £3500 in the Maldives, ah that would be the life, wouldn't it?!

I did it once, was just a touch over £4000!! Best holiday I ever had as when I got back I left the loser I was with at the time (and had been for 10 years) and never looked back since. Best £4000 I ever spent

Good luck, perfect ages for having a baby. I am 31 and my son is 3. Can't wait to be a mother of 2.

dreamsicle

an9i77 - that's what we plan to do, save so we have a bit of money behind us. I'm quite frugal to begin with, if I want, say a new top, I ebay one I already have and put the money towards it (also helps keep the place free of clutter!), I do surveys and things like that for extra pennies and we don't really go out much - and when we do go for meals we use vouchers if possible.
flutterby - sounds fab and good luck with baby no. 2